Under His Control [ON HOLD]

18. Numb

I'm only whatever you make me

And you make me more and more a villain every day

But you don't know, you reap, you sow

           𓇢𓆸݁˖ ❀ ⋆｡˚ ⟡⋆.˚❀⋆.˚⟡ 𓇢𓆸

It felt like my world stopped as I stared into the void eyes of the girl I killed. She had a family , friends—a life that I stole from her. The blood flowed from her  blue, bloodstained lips. Her body lay battered and ruined from the constant tortures she was put through before giving the final blow.

I slumped down on the hard concrete floor as the sobs shook my body uncontrollably. I didn't want this to happen. I didn't want to become a murderer.

I reach out to grab her hand, shaking her body to find even a glimpse of life in her but there was none. My heart thumped against my chest—dread creeped up my veins as I stared into nothingness. My hands were cold as ice.

I felt Ranvijay kneel in front of me —making me lose my hold on her hand. He cradled my face in his hands and looked at me.

"She's dead, Aleyna." He whispered as he wiped the tears off my cheeks gently. My vision cleared and I saw his face clearly. His dark eyes had a glint in them while his lips were stretched into a smirk.

"I-I didn't want to kill her, Ranvijay." My voice barely hearable , I sobbed loudly , the sounds of my cries echoed in the room .

"It's okay." He cooed me while burying my face in his hard chest. He ran his hand over my back as I weeped in his arms.

"You did a great job. Sweetheart. I'm proud of you." His voice so deep and rough alarmed my senses of the things he was capable of doing.

"Get away from me." I tried to push myself away from his strong frame.

"I can't breathe." I said while I rubbed my chest .

"It's difficult. I-I can't be a murderer. Ranvijay." I started trembling violently —the sound of the gunshot rang in my ears again and again making my heart drop.

"I killed her, Ranvijay." My one hand clutched on my chest while the other rested on the cold floor —I became a snivelling , shaking mess.

The look in her eyes was haunting me and the sole reason of her state was me.

Black dots started to appear in my vision as I tried hard to breathe .

"Ranvijay, Take her away." Avinash, Ranvijay's friend's voice sounded like a distant murmur.

"My wife is strong. Aren't you ? Sweetheart." I heard his faint voice when the exhaustion finally took over me.

****

"Please save me"

"He will come back and hurt me"

The voices came from under the vacant hallway as I went towards the sounds. I looked at the girl covered in blood , she had hid her head in between her arms.

I touched her shoulder wanting to ask her what was wrong.

She looked at me instantly and I screamed in utter horror as I took several steps back.

The blood was seeping out from her eyes and nose.

"You killed me, Aleyna"

"I wanted to live"

"You killed me"

She started moving towards me while her thigh bled out.

I gasped as I opened my eyes.I was shivering—tears rolled down my eyes . I was petrified of the nightmare I saw , it felt so real for a moment I thought she was alive.

I took in my surroundings—I was in the bedroom that was dimly lightened up. I curled myself more into the sheets , hugging my body tightly as the tremors of cold hit me.

The door opened slightly and someone came in. I didn't look into the direction. I sobbed as I felt the mattress dip beside me. A hand caressed my head—removing my hair that was covering my face completely.

"Sweetheart." His voice sent chills down my spine, I felt my throat tightening as fear began to run up my bones. I wanted to get away from him. I wanted to run away and never look back. He terrified me to the point I began shaking vigorously.

"Shh, It's going to be alright." His thumb rested on my lips as I whimpered.

"Leave me a-alone." I whispered shutting my eyes tightly.

"Now why would I do that? Baby." His tone changed—sounded more like he was mocking me. Making me remember who he was.

"Please , I want to be alone." I sniffled , my stomach churned as his hand stopped near my waist squeezing it gently.

"I can't leave my wife alone in this state." He whispered as he continued his ministrations.

"Come on, Eat something." He said making me sit.

"I don't want to, Ranvijay." I whispered while looking down on my lap—my fingers gripped the sheets in a firm grip.

"Are you defying me?." He eyed me while lifting my face with his hand on my chin. His hair fell over his forehead as he watched me with hooded eyes.

"No." I cried and shook my head. "I'm not defying you. I-I am not hungry." My lips quivered and my voice cracked.

I hadn't felt this much fear from a person in my entire life.

He hummed and snuggled me to his chest. I laid stiff in his arms , my breath hitched as he tightened his hold on my arms.

"What did you do to her brother?." I whispered, my voice sounded vulnerable. I wanted to know if the child was okay.

"He has been escorted to his home along with the corpse of his sister. I'm not that cruel." I flinched at his heartless words —not even empathy could be expressed.

"This wouldn't have happened if you had minded your own business, sweetheart." Tears prickled in my eyes once again as I registered his words. He was right. If I had stayed away she would've been alive.

"Right?." He asked.

"Y-Yes." I managed to mumble under my breath.

"But you had to poke your nose in things that don't concern you." He hissed near my face making me sob out loud.

"This was not even a percent of how much of a monster I can be, Aleyna." His voice reverberated against his chest.

"This was your first lesson." He said as he looked in my eyes.

"Now it's in your hands whether you want to make it your last lesson or one of the many more to come." He whispered and leaned in —smashing his lips against mine , his hand grabbed the nape of my neck to deepen the kiss.

He left me after pecking my lips for the last time he made me lay down on the bed and I instantly closed my eyes . I wanted nothing but to disappear. The weight on my chest increased manifold after hearing his words.

"Sweet dreams." He tucked me under the quilt and turned off the lights.

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Thoughts?