How many days has it been? How much longer am I to stay locked, trapped in this personal dungeon of mine? Alone, tired and uncomfortable. Cold in the winter but almost boiled alive in the summertime heat. The heat made the house smell, with as many cats as my mother owned, it was something I could smell even from the basement. The very basement I've been trapped in.. for.. well, I'm not sure. I know it's been a while. A few years. I kept track for the first three, but by the fourth, fifth I had lost track completely. There was no point, there was no use. And although I had nothing better to do, it was exhausting, trying to keep track. It took more brain strength than I was willing to exert. Most of my energy went to escaping, well the first few years anyways. Now, now I spend my energy making sure she knows how much I hated her. How I was glad daddy left her, even though it meant he left me too. How I'm glad she hadn't been able to find anyone since. How she was so miserable, her own cats couldn't even stand her!
"-you hear me!!? Whether I die, or escape, I'm always gon' hate you, ma! More than daddy for leaving! More than him not taking me with him! It wasn't me that drove him away and we both know it! It was you! It's why nobody wants to be in your life!!" I screamed till my throat went raw, the built up anger and being ignored was pissing me off beyond anything I ever felt. No matter how much I banged, scratched or kicked at the walls, the door didn't budge, and my mother was continuing to full on ignore me. Maybe she left? The thought of her leaving while I was still forced in my own imprisonment sent me berserk. I was starving, dying of thirst.
"You.. You- CUNT! I hate you! I've hated you since birth, I've hated you since I was conceived! I'll hate you till the end of time!"
You're probably wondering why my mother has me locked down in our basement. It started as a child really, perhaps it was because I was born a girl. The good for nothing, future harlot of our little town, just eager to bed herself to any man willing to spare me a glance.
This idea started in my preadolescent age. When some of my.. features started to show. Though, I may not be massively busty, if I may be so bold, I did mature early and respectively compared to some of the other girls my age. Due to this, I was subjected to some rather nasty rumors. Rumors my mother caught wind of, who was already worried about my reputation.
I hadn't even kissed a boy, I hardly spared any of the boys a glance. Maybe this is why they started, because I wasn't interested.. I was only a child; I wasn't even interested in stuff like that. I just wanted to meet people, make friends. To read and learn more about the world. I dreamed of one day meeting a boy I liked, but honestly, I had always hoped I was as far away from this place as possible before that happened.
My father left when I was just a toddler, my mother said it was because of me. Because of how horrible of a child, I was, so needy, so whiny, so useless.. My mother had always been self-conscious, and she projected that onto me quite a lot. She never missed an opportunity to degrade me, to make me feel ugly or unattractive. She wanted me to feel worse than she did, but between my father leaving, and my body maturing, she decided it was her duty to shield me from the world. The world is far too dangerous for a young woman who is still coming of age.
I called bull. She was a spiteful bitch, who was jealous of her own daughter.
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