I'm Harry? Lets fix this mess by fvdv123

Chapter 4 : To kiss or not to kiss, that is a question

I was still holding Hermione's hand, all kinds of different thoughts and possibilities going through my mind, then I remembered I was going to wake up sleeping beauty… with a kiss. Maybe you don't realize it, but this opens a whole big can of worms.

Here is the dilemma: Old guy falls downstairs, wakes up in Harry. Now, who is he? Harry? Old guy? Or maybe Harry with old guy's memories, or an old guy with Harry's body.

Now, what is going on when they kiss? Is it Harry's first kiss, or an old guy with a pedo dream? This could be as innocent as a white dove, or as nasty as the cops, banging on my door to arrest me. In fanfics the self-inserts are young, 13 til 20 years, so still acceptable... kinda, and most start at year 4 or up.

So here I am, staring at Hermione's lips. Next dilemma: If Harry kisses Hermione, and she doesn't wake up, is this his first kiss? Or doesn't it count as one? By now all kinds of questions pop up.

If she is awake in there, and Harry kisses her, will he get slapped? Her mouth is open, should I use my tongue? Should I wait for the potion to wake her up, and then kiss her… No, I was trying to wake her up with a kiss. Now...What to do….. Inspiration struck me.

"Hermione, if you are awake in there, I am going to try, and wake you up, with a kiss. If this fails, don't kill me when you get your potion. If it works, sorry for not trying it sooner."

Now tell me, this got all bases covered, if not meh, I'll pretend it is CPR. I'll not use my tongue then, that would be creepy.

If it works, Colin bloody Creevy can wait on his potion, no way I am him kissing him, he is a crazy fanboy already, if he gets a kiss, he will go nuts, and me mentally scarred…. Penelope on the other hand, 7th year…. Yes, with tongue on her, she is an adult, so my morals are put on the shelf. I'll give Percy a green hat, two even, she is a looker too.

I lower myself to Hermione's lips, half expecting to be interrupted. Most fanfic authors do that you know, It's called cock blocking or something, personally, I never liked it. If you start with the action, you don't stop for some fucking useless comments, I really hate that.

To be sure nobody is looking, I looked around, all clear, I hold one hand, and I put the other on her body so I don't fall over ….. …. I moved my hands to a safer spot. Looked at Hermione and said: "Sorry about that."

And I went for the lips. I hesitated long enough, so I kissed her. The lips were warm, it surprised me, a statue normally has no blood circulation, so I was expecting cold lips. Strange texture, not hard not soft, daring I gave them a lick… …. …. nothing, no taste at all.

By now 15 seconds passed, and I heard someone behind me clear her throat "I hope you have a good explanation ready, you are going to need one." I raised my head, looked at Hermione thinking: "Wake up please, wake up" The Great Goat God didn't hear me, racist, probably he's only working for Goblins.

I looked up, and saw a woman in her late thirty's, with a monocle on her eye, sternly looking at me. Well, if she raised her eyebrow, her monocle would fall down.

"Ehmm, This is not what it looks like… … yeah, it is what it looks like. I was trying to wake her up with a kiss." "Good try boy, but why on earth would you think it would work?" "Well Madam I am muggle raised, and in one of our fairy tales, there is a story about a sleeping beauty waking up with a kiss, so I thought let's try it?" Madam Bones raised her brow, her monocle falling down. "And you believe in fairy tales young man? How old are you?" Now have some fun with her.