Goodbye Agony- Chapter 1

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**TRIGGER WARNING (But only mentions of certain triggering things)/ LANGUAGE WARNING (but unless you are a lil bitch then it doesn't really matter haha)

A/N- I'm Aussie, so I say Mum instead of Mom  (realised instead of realized, etc.) just so you know X3

Also, the BVB timeline isn't 100% correct, to make the story flow better (the band as it is now {Andy, Jinxx, Ashley, Jake, and CC} was established at the time of Knives & Pens' release, and there is a different vid in the story instead of the real one)

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The shrill sound of my alarm clock pierced through my head, making me sloppily sit up in bed and shoot a death glare at the clock radio next to me and angrily hit the 'off' button. "DESTINY! BREAKFAST!" I heard mum shout from the other room. I could smell the irresistible scent of bacon frying in the other room and sprinted over to my wardrobe to get dressed, because although I usually took my time, I had woken up hungry that morning.

"Coming!" I threw on a black Bring Me The Horizon t-shirt and leggings and padded down the hallway into the kitchen.  A steaming plate of bacon and eggs sat on the table. "Thanks!" I sat and started to chow down.  Bacon used to be the highest luxury for us, like a once-every-six-months meal. My dad had died in a car accident the previous year, and was unemployed even before the accident, meaning we were never a rich or well-lived family. My mum's previous job hadn't paid well, but she had since gotten employed as a hair dresser at a fancy hair salon in the city which paid good money. That also meant she could cut my hair, and we saved on the expensive hair dye jobs I had wanted. She did it for me, and the pale pink was certainly worth the stains in the bathtub. My dad's death also meant my mum got child support money, so we went from barely being able to afford anything other than bread to upper-middle class in about a month. I missed my dad. He had gotten me into the music I was into then: Green Day, Nirvana and Blink 182, and from there I discovered other bands like Chelsea Grin, Pierce the Veil and my all time favourite, Falling In Reverse. 

Their music had helped me in so many ways. I was treated pretty badly at school for dressing the way I did and listening to the music I did. 'FREAK!' 'EMO FUCKTARD!' 'UGLY GOTH BITCH!' It really got to me, although I was pretty good at concealing it and never let anyone see my true pain. It started when I was about 11, and I self harmed for years. I tried to commit suicide 4 times... once by overdose (although there were only 12 or so pills left, and they just gave me blurry vision for a bit and made me fall asleep so that didn't work) and three by drowning. It fucking sucked, and I lost interest in everything except sleep, American Horror Story and Jacky Vincent's guitar solos. I tried to get help. I really did. But I couldn't. Until I realised, one day while I was watching AHS,  that what I was doing had absolutely no point to it. Slicing your skin did nothing except leave scars that would remind you of the past when things got better, so I actually started trying to help myself stop. The rush from inflicting pain on yourself was pretty damn addictive and it took me 6 months to work up the willpower to flush my blades and really try to stop fucking up my skin. My self esteem didn't get any better, but I had at least figured out how to stop making it worse with physical pain. I was one month clean, and there I was, still being called names and being neglected by everyone except for music and my mum, (as soppy as it sounds) but I managed to suffocate the urges and ward them off with music.

I finished my breakfast, applied my makeup (heavy eyeliner, of course) and headed off to school with my earbuds in and Suicide Silence blasting through them. As I arrived at school, people passed me in the  hostile corridors and made comments as they usually did but I just focused on the music and headed to class. English...yuck. I resumed my usual spot at the very back of the room, in the corner, removed one earbud so I wouldn't get yelled at and blankly stared at the whiteboard. I scribbled in my book, acting as if I was busy so I would be left alone, and noticed someone approaching me. I sighed and acted as if they weren't there.  I could see the tousled brown hair out of the corner of my eye and knew exactly who it was. Jason, the quarterback on the football team, 'popular guy', and the dude that calls me 'emo bitch' as if it were my real name. He came up beside me. "Hey emo bitch." He smirked. "Who are you plotting against today?" I looked up at him but didn't react, making a point of turning up the volume on my headphones and putting the other one in.  He walked off, looking slightly defeated but with that stupid smirk still on his face, and said something to his friend. I saw our teacher, Mr Wofsworth, enter the class saying the words 'good morning class!' and then signalling for me to take out my headphones as he usually did. I reluctantly removed them and tucked them into my pocket. He looked around the class with his usual, annoyingly cheerful expression and started to write something on the board. 'Exciting news!' In bold orange marker. 'Yeah right...' I though to myself, knowing that it was probably another stupid field trip to another stupid museum or something of the liking.

He looked up at the ceiling and tapped his chin as if he was trying to remember something. "Class! We have a new student joining us today!" It was different news than the regular, but it was probably some fake blonde girl with too much foundation on. The type Jason would drool over. Nothing of note. Mr Wofsworth continued, with a welcoming expression. "Welcome... Andy Biersack!" Oh, a boy. Probably a douchebag, like the ones that had overrun the school.

A tall, skinny boy, wearing skinny jeans and a black hoodie entered the classroom. Abruptly sitting up, I inhaled a little deeper than usual. WOAH. I immediately had some sort of found interest in the 'exciting news'. Confusion and disbelief swept over me, and I couldn't look away as much as I tried to. He... was... fucking...gorgeous...

Black hair...bangs swept over one of his bright blue eyes... pale porcelain skin...snakebites...

I could feel myself blushing profusely. Our eyes were locked on each other. I could not believe what I was looking at... perhaps the most gorgeous boy to ever exist, in my eyes. Jason looked over at me and gave me that stupid smirk again. "Someone has a crush!" I averted my eyes and focused on my paper, trying to gain some sort of control on my tomato cheeks and my brain which was a mess of confusion and shock and...happiness?  I could feel Andy still staring at me. He was so... perfect... as much as I hated to admit it... and I needed to have some composure. Just a bit.  Just enough not to act like one of the drama freaks who always acted positive about everything and genuinely liked other humans. Yuck. I heard Mr Wofsworth begin talking again. "Andy, you can go and sit up the back with Destiny." I nearly passed out. He was going to sit next to me?! 'Oh god, don't fuck up...' the thought must've gone through my head over 100 times.

He gave me a cute grin, flicked his bangs out of his eyes and sat next to me. My heart was racing. "W-welcome to Breskinary High!" I said, purposely fake-enthusiastically. "I'm Destiny... hi.." He softly giggled and held out his hand for me to shake it. "I'm Andy...hey!" His voice... it was gorgeous... deep and soft and just holy shit. Was there anything about this boy that wasn't perfect? I shook his hand... it was warm and a little sweaty and like twice the size of mine. I was internally giggling to myself over a fact about a guy's hand size compared to something else *evil giggle* and also internally screaming because of the position I was in. We talked a bit throughout the lesson, mainly about the school (the best teachers, people to avoid, things NOT to do, etc.) and I thankfully didn't say anything stupid. Except for avoiding the cafeteria pizza because you'd get diarrhea but he chuckled at that, thank fuck.

As soon as the day was out, I came home and collapsed into a crumpled, sobbing heap on my bed. Not because I was sad, the usual emotion I had grown immune to. But because I was so happy, so freaked out, so excited, so LOVESTRUCK by Andy and I was so happy that I was (hopefully) finally not alone anymore. I had found a person to take the pain away, to focus on.

I had found someone... like me.

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Hope you guys enjoyed it! This is my first fic, so please leave a vote or comment if you enjoyed it lmao

The BMTH shirt --> http://heavymetalmerchant.com/product/bring-me-the-horizon-wolf-bones-shirt (FREE sHIPPING TO AUS YAY) I have it and it's even cooler irl XD

"I sit here and smile dear, I smile because I think of you and I blush." - The Mortician's Daughter

Listening to: The Drug In Me Is You- Falling In Reverse

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