Forbidden Bonds

Chapter 8.

Lily couldn't sleep. She had been thinking about Roxy and her feelings towards the older girl, she didn't know what Roxy would say if she'd found out that Lily was crushing on her, and now even Lily's own mother seemed disgusted by the thought of her daughter being who she wanted to be, Lily couldn't help but think about what Roxy's arm felt like being draped around her, she couldn't help but want to be held by her.

Lily sat up and switched on her lamp, she pulled out her phone and saw that the time read 3:56am, she sighed and placed her phone back down on her bedside table before getting out of bed, Lily put on her night gown and exited her room before she went down the stairs, she went into the kitchen and turned on the light before making herself a cup of tea, Lily always made herself a cup of tea when she woke up and couldn't go back to sleep.

Lily made her tea and went back up to bed, she rested into her bed and sipped her tea in thought, Lily thought about David and Mister Brotherhood's advice, but she couldn't help but think about her mother, and Sharron's feelings about homosexuality, the feeling gave Lily a knot in her stomach and a lump in her throat, she wanted more than anything to be with Roxy, but she was so afraid of everyone judging her, even the very girl she was in love with.

The next day at school, Lily avoided Roxy, every time Roxy tried to speak with her, Lily would dash off somewhere or go to find David, Lily knew in her heart that David and Mister Brotherhood were right about embracing who she was and what she was in to, but she was still afraid of her mother's judgement.

"I just don't know what to do, David..." Lily confessed while eating lunch next to her friend, "I want to embrace who I am and who I love...I wanna be with Roxy...but I'm scared...scared of what Mom would think about it...I just...don't want her to be disappointed in me...", Lily looked down sadly and David rested a hand on her back, "hey...you don't need to worry about what your mom thinks, she, nor anyone else, decides what you are, you do, you are who you choose to be!" He told her confidently.

Lily looked up and smiled at her friend "thanks, Dave....you always know what to say...you're a good friend" she told him softly, David patted Lily on the back and went back to eating "no problem!" He told her while chewing on his food, Lily stared back at her own lunch and thought over her friend's words.

Suddenly, Roxy approached the two friends and sat by Lily "hey, kiddo! What's up!" She questioned brightly, Roxy called Lily 'kid' or 'kiddo' as her cute little nickname, to tofu, anyone younger than her was a 'kid" in her eyes, "you've been avoiding me all day! is everything okay...?" She noticed the glum look on Lily's face and put an arm around her shoulder "hey...you okay, kid...?" She questioned tentatively, she instinctively pulled Lily close which took the blonde by surprise, Roxy gave Lily a soft squeeze and tilted her head "what's wrong? You can tell me..." she coaxed.

Lily felt safe talking to Roxy, but wasn't quite ready to tell her the full truth yet, "I'm just...dealing with a lot at home" she told the 'Bad Girl', not quite telling the whole truth ,"there's this friend who has a crush on a girl...and she doesn't know quite how to tell her, also she's worried about her judgement...about...her mother's judgement...", Roxy raised an eyebrow and she suddenly gave a little smirk, "well, tell your "friend" that whoever her crush is....she would accept who your friend likes no matter what sexuality she is".

Lily gave a soft smile and nodded "thank you...I'll tell her that" Roxy patted Lily's arm with the hand that was still around her shoulder and said confidently "Attagirl! Now, what do you say we ditch lunch and go to recess just a tad early?" Lily looked down at her food and decided she wasn't hungry, she'd eaten quite a lot and was quite full, "I'd like that!" She told Roxy, smiling brightly, the two girls stood up from their seats and exited the cafeteria, Lily turned back and waved 'goodbye' to David, who gave her a little finger salute, before turning her attention back to Roxy and placing an arm around her.

Lily and Roxy sat on a bench on the school grounds, enjoying the sun, Roxy had her arm firmly and protective;u wrapped around Lily who leaned into her touch, feeling safer than she ever did, "Roxy...what's your thoughts on...homosexuality!" Lily questioned hesitantly, Roxy turned her attention to Lily and raised an eyebrow in confusion "what do you mean?" She questioned, "I mean...what's your opinion on them...? Mom thinks it's a sin and that all gays are bad...but I never saw it that way...", Roxy shrugged and replied with a nonchalant "I don't care, it's their business...it's not my place to judge or decide who should be in love with with who...you love who you love, y'know?".

Lily nodded in agreement. "I guess...I've never seen a problem with it, my mom claims it to be an outright "sin to God".....which I always thought never made sense" she confessed, "I mean, why would God or Jesus judge anyone for what they're in to or what they may look like? My own beliefs are that if God made you, he'd never judge your hobbies, race, religion, sexuality, etcetera...I believe he loves us no matter what...".

Roxy was impressed by Lily's statement, she really did admire her new friend, "y'know...you're very much like me" Roxy told the blonde nonchalantly, "I see a lot of myself in you...you're smart, kind, loyal, bold, you have strong beliefs, I admire you're confidence!", Lily blushed slightly and suddenly looked away sheepishly "thanks..." she murmured, Roxy patted Lily's arm and tightened her grip around her shoulder, "no problem, kid...anytime".

The two girls looked ahead in silence, enjoying the time they had together, then Roxy turned her attention to Lily and commented with concern "you've been avoiding me, y'know? Is something wrong? Did I upset you in any way?" Lily turned her attention to Roxy but was lost for words, "no..it's just that I...I...." Was all she could say, she felt her cheeks flush and she suddenly quickly stood from the bench and ran off "I don't wanna talk about it right now!" Lily cried as she sprinted off.

Roxy watched Lily go, she felt a mixture of sadness and concern for Lily, she sighed and stood from the bench before lighting herself a cigarette, Roxy thought about Lily's predicament and how she was being treated by her mother. Roxy felt sorry for the blonde and was willing to d0 whatever it took to make Lily happy, she really did like her. Roxy surveyed her surroundings and deserted the bench, deciding to take a walk round campus and miss a few minutes of the afternoon's first lesson to get some air.