fresh start ; paige bueckers

✮ 11

Lily

For the first time since meeting her, I was nervous to see Paige. Our text conversation earlier in the day weighed heavy on my mind. She wanted to talk about us when we saw each other but I'm not sure a frat house party was the best setting for such a loaded topic. Even though she had reassured me that she was enjoying what we had going on - whatever it was - there was still a voice in the back of my mind that told me I wasn't good enough for Paige.

"Lils, are you ready?" Madison asked peeking her head into my bedroom as I spritzed my favourite perfume on my wrists and collarbones.

"Yep! Coming now." I replied, grabbing my bag and slinging it over my shoulder, my phone, wallet and keys nestled perfectly inside.

I checked my outfit one last time in my full length mirror, I had gone for a simple black mini skirt and white baby tee with some black boots and an oversized leather jacket, before joining my roommates in the living room.

"You guys look amazing!" I complemented seeing my friends fully ready for tonight's party.

"Says you!" Hannah responds, "Paige is going to be like a dog with a bone!"

I look to Kelsey as she says this to gauge her reaction. I had told Paige I would tell her about us but hadn't had the chance to yet. I didn't want to disappoint her at my lack of loyalty to our pact, our friendship meant a lot to me.

"I'm sure Paige has lots of bones." I say trying to play off Hannahs comment but just voicing that made me recoil. The thought of Paige with anyone else the way I'd been with her made me want to hurl.

"And she'd be crazy to not choose you. You're for sure the juiciest." Kelsey quips playfully smacking my ass and we all laugh.

My friends relaxed demeanour about the topic of me and Paige put my anxious thoughts at ease.

"OK, enough with the bone metaphors, lets go!" Madison piped up, leading us out of the door.

Kelsey and I walked together behind Hannah and Madison as we made our way across campus to the girls' apartment for pre drinks.

"What's up?" She asks, nudging me gently. I'd not said a word so far, trying to work out the right ones.

"So..." I begin, "I've kinda been hanging out with Paige a lot recently."

She gasps dramatically, hands over her chest, "Really? I would have never guessed."

I look at her seriously, has it been that obvious?

"Are you mad?"

"Mad? About how long it's taken you to tell me? Yes."

"But our pact...our bracelets...I don't want you to think-"

"Girl, those bracelets cost me like $2, don't sweat it." She says placing a reassuring hand on my arm.

"Really?"

"Really. Besides, I don't know who I was fooling telling myself I'd be single an entire semester. I'm already so bored, I got a job!" She laughs.

"This wasn't my intention, it just kind of happened naturally and the more time we spend together, the more I'm realising how much I actually like Paige." I confess.