Beneath The Surface || KNJ

06

Namjoon sat at his office desk, his eyes staring blankly at the stack of papers in front of him. The pages of his latest writing project, waiting for his review, were scattered across the table, yet his mind was far from the task at hand. He was lost in thought, his focus consumed by the conversation he’d had with Yoongi earlier that day.

Yoongi’s words had struck a chord, reverberating through the walls Namjoon had built around his heart. “You deserve to be happy, Namjoon,” Yoongi had said, his voice calm but firm. “We all want that for you—your parents, your friends. You’ve been stuck in this place since Yeji left, and it’s time to move forward.”

Namjoon sighed, running a hand through his hair. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to be happy. In fact, he longed for it—longed for the vibrant colours that had faded from his life after Yeji had left him.

He remembered the emptiness that had followed, the way everything had seemed to dull and lose its meaning. The thought of going through that kind of heartbreak again terrified him. It wasn’t just the fear of being left alone; it was the fear that he might not be able to recover a second time.

The energy, the resilience it took to rebuild himself… he wasn’t sure if he had it in him anymore.

But as much as he tried to shield himself from that pain, he couldn’t ignore the growing sense of unease. His parents worried about him, constantly reminding him that he deserved to find happiness again.

He hated seeing the concern in their eyes, the way they tiptoed around the subject of his future, never wanting to pressure him but clearly hoping he would take that step toward settling down.

And then there was Hana.

The memory of their recent meeting at the café resurfaced, mingling with his thoughts of Yeji. He had been unfair to Hana, lashing out in frustration and hurt, assuming she was behind the marriage proposal that had blindsided him.

But now, in the quiet of his office, he realized he might have been wrong. Maybe he had been projecting his own fears and insecurities onto her, seeing betrayal where there was none.

Namjoon leaned back in his chair, closing his eyes. Hana was different. She wasn’t Yeji, and their circumstances weren’t the same.

The way he heard things from Taehyung was enough to know atleast, She wasn’t someone who played games or manipulated others. And yet, he had allowed his fear to cloud his judgment, to push her away without giving her a fair chance.

Maybe, he thought, just maybe, he was overthinking all of this. He had been so consumed by his fear of another heartbreak that he hadn’t considered the possibility that things could turn out differently this time. That he could be happy again, if only he allowed himself to take that risk.

What if, instead of running from the idea of marriage, he embraced it? What if marrying Hana wasn’t the end of his freedom, but the beginning of something new—something better? The thought of settling down with her, of building a life together, didn’t seem so frightening when he looked at it from this perspective.

Maybe he wouldn’t be left alone this time. Maybe, if they took this step together, they could find happiness in each other.

Namjoon opened his eyes, a sense of clarity washing over him. It was still a terrifying prospect—putting his heart on the line again—but maybe it was worth it. Maybe, if he let go of his fear, he could see the potential for something beautiful with Hana.

He reached for his phone, his hand hovering over the screen. He wanted to call her, to apologize for how he had acted and to talk about everything that had been left unsaid. But as he stared at the screen, he hesitated.