Pointdexter: A Swooning Over Stan-fiction

Chapter Ten

The twins lead Alice the long way into town, explaining various landmarks that only had meaning to them. According to them, there was a stump where a bunch of gnomes tried to marry Mabel, a patch of woods that had dinosaurs stuck in amber underneath, and of course, the patch of field where they met a cherub. All things that she could now imagine with everything she had been shown.

"And this is where we saw those two ghostly old people-" Mabel continued, gesturing to an old convenience store that looked like it hadn't been used in years. Alice stared at the place for a moment, Why am I shocked... Ghosts exist.

Dipper pointed out an odd, log-shaped building settled a top of an old train-cart, a sign blaring 'food' at the door. Alice took in the place, it looked cozy, a place where you get a home-cooked meal. The twins led Alice inside, only for her to realize that they seemed to know everyone in town. Several people, young and old, waved at the pair as they claimed a boot.

Alice sat across from them, glancing over the menu as Mabel blew her paper wrapper off her straw at Dipper's face. His retaliation came in the form of a swift smack with the laminated menu, earning a laugh from Alice. An older woman in a pastel pink waitress dress waddled up to the table and smiled.

"Hiya kids! And stranger!" The woman, Susan, Alice read off her name tag. "What can I get for ya?"

"Pancakes and all three syrups for me, please, Lazy Susan!" Mabel chimed as if she had known from the moment she arrived what she wanted for breakfast. Alice almost spoke up when she said the woman's name, but when she took a look at Susan, she noticed her lazy eye.

Literal naming... Very nice.

"Um... Same for me, actually." Dipper added, smiling at the woman.

"Make that three," Alice added as Lazy Susan turned to her.

"Comin' right up, sweetie!" Lazy Susan winked, with her good eyes, and started to the back of the diner. Alice wondered if the woman's wink was a blink or not, but figured it was best not to think about it too long.

The wait for food felt longer than most places Alice had been to. Mainly due to the twins interrogating her as if they were attempting to solve a mystery. It was almost intimidating but she had crashed her car into their house and started hanging around their great-uncles. They were bound to have questions. Once her irrational fear of the two thirteen-year-olds started to fade, Alice could see it for what it was.

They cared about their Grunkles.

Mabel's questions were nonsensical, such as- "If you were stranded on a deserted island with no boat- no cheating! What would you take with you?."

The answer was easy, books.

Dipper's questions, on the other hand, were far more careful and calculated, like "What were you doing before you came here? School, work, both, neither? Did you know about Gravity Falls before you crashed into the shack?"

That one was harder to answer without spilling her life story, but she told him that she was moving and trying to find somewhere, and no. She hadn't heard of Gravity Falls, ever.

Through the conversation, it was easy to see which Grunkle each twin took after. Stan and Mabel as goofy partners in crime, versus the quiet brainiacs, Ford and Dipper. It was such an interesting contrast, especially with Alice throwing herself into the middle of the group. But as the twins raced to see which syrup bottle dripped into their mouths the fastest (Dipper's blueberry syrup beats Mabel's classic mable by a millisecond, Alice swore on it), she could tell that these kids did a lot more for their Grunkles than just acting as cute counterparts.

"Aaand here we go!" Lazy Susan suddenly chimed, setting the plates down on the table in front of Alice and the twins. "Enjoy, kiddos, let me know if ya need anythin else!"

The kids dug into their food, falling silent as she shoved down pancakes like they'd never been fed before. Between mouthfuls that Alice managed, she got a few more questions about herself, and her theories on aliens versus which member of M-Syncronized was her favorite.

That was until Mabel spoke up through a mouthful of pancakes.

"So, Alice," She said, almost slyly. "If, in a totally made-up and not real situation, you had to pick who your favorite was, who's you pick: Grunkle Stan? Or Grunkle Ford?"

Alice was taken aback, it seemed too planned compared to her other cute questions. Dipper shoved his elbow into his sister's side and she elbowed him right back, their wide eyes staring at each other in a sibling-linked look that Alice couldn't decipher.

"Like..." Mabel continued. "Say you're in a movie. Like one of those weird movies Grunkle Stan watches on TV with the ladies in the poofy dresses riding horses."

Oddly specific... Dipper leaned back in his seat, sliding down as if he were just as uncomfortable as Alice

"You're the main character of this movie and you got two guys who are both madly in love with you-"

She does not mess around with getting to the point. Alice found herself thinking, trying not to meet Mabel's eyes.

"But you could only marry one of them so you could be the next in line for the throne!" Mabel followed up, holding up a knife and spoon respectfully. "What would you do? If Grunkle Stan and Grunkle Ford were your choices, who would you go with?"

"Mabel, that's kinda weird, isn't it?" Dipper chimed in, the only thing Alice could see of him was his hat poking over the table. "Like... really weird. And kinda gross."

"C'mon Dipper!!" Mabel said, turning to her brother and shoving his head farther down the seat. "This is important information that's vital to my research."

"What research?" Dipper and Annie chimed at the same time, the former sliding his way back up his seat and both staring at the thirteen-year-old girl.

"None of your business," Mabel sneered at her brother. "Yet. But I'm still gathering other research."

Mabel leaned toward her twin's ear to whisper, waggling her brow at Alice before she replied- in something far louder than a whisper.

"Research into how you're a HUGE NERD." And with that, Mabel catapults the spoonful of melted butter from atop her pancakes onto Dipper's cheek with a very satisfying splat. Dipper jerks in disgust, retaliating by smearing strawberry syrup on Mabel's nose, a drop of the stuff falling onto her sweater.

"Eww, gross!!" Mabel cried out, swiping at the stuff as Alice stifled a chuckle.

"You're gross," Dipper laughed at his sister, with no vitriol between the twins, just giggles and various food-missiles. Alice was glad for the distraction from Mabel's targeted question, nothing wanting more than not to think about it herself. She already knew who'd she pick, if she had to, but she would never say it aloud.

"You two are dorks," Alice said with a chuckle, taking a bite of pancakes.

"Maybe you're right!" Mabel smiled at her, elbowing her brother. "But we're twins, so it's adorable."

"If you say so, Mabel," Dipper said with a snort.

"WAIT, QUICK!" Mabel suddenly shouted. "Alice! Take a picture of us while Dipper's got pancake on his face!"

"I have what?" Dipper squeaked out, swiping at his face and, after several passes, got it off.

"Aww!" Mabel groaned. "I was trying to get more candid pictures of us!"

"Mabel," Dipper said, suddenly serious. "You have syrup... Everywhere."

"Really?" Mabel questioned, holding her sweater out in front of her. "Augh, then it would've been a perfect photo."

Alice reached out, "Here, let me get it. Your hands are sticky enough."

She pushed her plate to the side, leaning over the table and dipping her napkin in her water. Alice wiped the syrup off Mabel's cheek, the excess swiping off easily but a good portion doesn't dare move. She hesitated, drawing back and shaking her head.

"Maybe the syrup as makeup will be the next new look-" She tried with a small laugh.

"That's one word for it."