もののけ | monster | soshiro hoshina (Kaiju No. 8) (COMPLETE)

ろくじゅうきゅう | sixty nine

もののけ | kaiju | monster

69

[A lengthy chapter ahead]

Soshiro

I'D TOLD THEM FROM THE START, if I had to get locked up, I wanted her by my side. But of course, they wouldn't let me have that. Now, here I am, trapped in this hellhole, stuck for nearly two days, and every minute just makes me lose my grip on reality a little more. The walls are closing in, and every tick of the clock seems to mock me.

Gen's doing everything he can to get me out of this goddamn probation, but I know it's a monumental task. The pressure's on him to spin a web of lies just to get me out of here, to make those higher-ups turn their gaze elsewhere. It's a damn circus, and I'm stuck in the middle of it.

The room feels smaller by the minute, and the isolation gnaws at me like a relentless predator. I can feel my sanity fraying at the edges. Every sound, every creak of the building feels amplified, echoing my frustration and despair. I can't escape the relentless hum of the fluorescent lights above, the incessant buzz of a world that seems determined to keep me in this purgatory.

I'm haunted by the thought of what's happening outside, of what's happening to her. I can't stop thinking about Kiyomi, about how she's out there and I'm stuck here, helpless. The longer I'm locked up, the more I feel like I'm losing a grip on everything I hold dear. I'm forced to pretend, to say whatever they want me to say, just to placate those above me and make them turn their eyes away from me.

It's a sick game, one that's tearing me apart from the inside. I have to sit here, pretending to be okay with the lies I'm being forced to spout, all while I'm seething with rage and helplessness. The frustration is almost unbearable. I'm suffocating under the weight of it all, struggling to keep my composure as I wait for Gen to pull off some miracle that will get me out of this hellhole.

I don't know what's happening, especially with Kiyomi, now that I've learned she's carrying our baby. "Fuck." I cursed aloud, the weight of it all crashing down on me. I still can't wrap my head around it—me and her... a baby. Is Kiyomi even aware of it yet? Gen stopped by an hour ago and mentioned the same damned thing—she's not speaking. And now they're planning to inject her with some drug to force the truth out of her. The very thought of it makes my nerves fray to their breaking point.

I don't fucking know whether I'm more furious with Kazuya, that piece of shit, or the higher-ups who are hell-bent on seeing Kiyomi dead. They're all scum, every last one of them, but the worst part is—l'm mad at her too. I hate that I'm mad at her. How could she just sit there, not saying a goddamn word, like she's accepting all this bullshit that's happening to her? She's not even fucking fighting! How could she let them do this to her?

But fuck, the truth is, I'm angrier at myself. I'm fucking furious with myself for not being able to save her from all of this. I should've seen this coming. I should've done something—anything. We should've run away together. I don't give a shit where, just somewhere, anywhere, as long as it's far from this nightmare. We could've disappeared, left everything behind, just me and her against the world. But I didn't. I fucking failed her. And now... now she's paying the price.

My thoughts were interrupted by the sudden shuffling sounds outside my cell. I jerked my head up and glared at the door, noticing the small sliding window creak open. Through it, I saw the familiar, smug face of my brother, Soichiro. "You look fucking pitiful," he said, his voice dripping with condescension. I rolled my eyes, not even bothering to get up from where I was slumped against the wall. "Well, hello to you too," I shot back, my tone laced with sarcasm.