Their Little Life | SVT 96L

Chapter 8

After his social media live with Juniper finished, it didn't make Wyn famous in one day. Juniper said it just makes him more known to the people. His social media where he started to post his own music started getting notice but it wasn't enough.

But it was enough for his family to know what happened. After that live, he kept getting messages from home which he tried to ignore as it was questioning his act with live and his social media which became active as an artist. His father and mother now eagerly asked him to come back home repeatedly until Wyn didn't reply to them anymore.

Last time he spoke to them, his father was mad at him and said things like he would never succeed in this field. That made him angry too and he said that he was gonna succeed on his own. And then wondering if he made the right choice by getting angry at them. As he knew, he couldn't survive without their money. He wasn't a dreamer willingly to go broke to pursue his dream, for now at least.

All of his life has been planned out as to continue his father's business and he felt that he was never enough. He is always very eager to prove himself that he can do anything besides what his father wanted him to but even having something aside from what his father wants is hard too.

Finally, being away from them made him braver. Living with his friends makes him able to dream things that he thought were only a hobby, an appreciation for playing music. But then, he got greedy and started making music. One of his first songs was a success and their family all were saying how it was beginner's luck as the second, the third and so on were never picked up.

Most of the time, he was tired of trying. He was thinking of coming back fulfilling his father's desires but he wasn't sure of the kind of tiredness he will go through when he goes back. Even Juniper's help only gathered a few fans. Though, he keeps emailing samples to producers and music labels. It seemed too hard to get picked up.

"I think I'm losing to my father now," Wyn said to Serkan one day.

They were eating in the cafeteria campus. Only two of them because Rayinu's campus was far and Juniper already dropped out.

Serkan's eyes looked up at Wyn, he gulped down the food and drank water, "Why? Why you suddenly want to give up?"

"I'm getting tired, Ser. They worried about me. They want me to have an internship at the company," Wyn said bitterly.

"You won't have time to do what you like then. Are you sure?"

Wyn let out a heavy sigh. He didn't know anything anymore. Everything seemed wrong. "I can't always live in between like this."

The small eyes of Serkan were staring at Wyn. There's a hint of disappointment there and Wyn felt bad about it. Serkan was always supportive towards him but now he couldn't feel the support he gave anymore. Maybe Juniper was right, Serkan was too dreamy for himself. Once he was deep down in pessimism, he was just jealous that Serkan had that kind of confidence for Wyn.

"I'm sorry I'm giving up," Wyn said.

Serkan raised his eyebrow, "Why you apologising to me?"

Wyn gulped down his saliva, "Because you put hope on me. And I might lose it all." It hurt to say that he might let go of his small dream. He thought it would be big, bigger than him. But it turned out it'll be a small part of him forever

"You should apologise to yourself, Wyn," Serkan said. His disappointment wasn't about Wyn giving up, but seeing the light fading on Wyn's eyes made Serkan sad about his friend. He believed through his bones that Wyn was gonna succeed. He made songs like there's no tomorrow and there are so many cases where Serkan would cry with his songs. That he knew every part of the songs of Wyn and he knew unsaid things that Wyn never told through his songs.

"You would do an internship at home, then?" Serkan asked.

Wyn replied with a nod.

The plan was Serkan was about to do an internship in his family business while Wyn was about to find the closest one from here. He didn't want to go back at first because in here was close to the music industry rather than his own hometown. But the plan changed.

Wyn was thinking that Serkan had been his rock. He was the strength in their little group. The one who can put spirit and energy on them. Serkan has a tough life that he never disclosed with someone that he rarely knew. He was such a social butterfly that hanging around with people but only with them, he could curse out his father and his mother and all of his illegally step siblings.

Serkan knew every woman that his father ever slept with and kept the contact. It has been like that since he was in high school. Ever since that his mother divorced his father because of his habitual cheating. He never remarried someone but the women he met were in big numbers. Serkan even said that he had data written in his spreadsheet for that. Rayinu said he was crazy but he replied that he was crazy at the second that his mother was giving him the responsibility to take care of his father now.

Some of his step siblings were famous too (As his father sometimes dated celebrities and made a child out of it), but most of them were not. Serkan needs to remind his father's assistant about giving money to each one so there would be no drama. He never skipped school unless there was a problem with his father or his step siblings or maybe the women that his father slept with started causing trouble.

It was very funny, Wyn thought. Serkan definitely has an only son vibe and even more child-like but what he held on his shoulder was bigger. Maybe that's why he had so much anger in himself. Because he knew he didn't deserve this kind of life that he had to suffer because of his own family.

That anger made him stronger, fiercer. He never hesitated to throw tantrums on his family, he was very decisive since he made hard decisions since high school. Sometimes when things got too hard, the three could see him as a first child of the Arslan family. But most of them looked at Serkan as a little brother. Maybe that's what he needed, though. A place where he could drop all the adult acts.

"You know sometimes I wish I was you, Ser," Wyn said thinking being Serkan wasn't easy but at least it doesn't feel complicated.

Serkan laughed hard, "Because?" He doubted that anyone wanted to have his life.

"You are passionate about business. You take care of people as the first child. I wish I had more responsibilities like you as a first child myself."

That was the most honest thought that he shared with Serkan. He was born as a first child and had a little sister. But he never thought he would set a good example to his sister. Even living his own life was hard, let alone to show people that he could love or even give. Unlike Serkan, he had so many let-downs that he was ashamed of himself. And that adds to his insecurities. He thought he could prove himself by finding his own passion but truth is the competition was hard. He was drowning either way, he thought.

"Everyone had their own problem, Wyn. You wouldn't want to switch bodies with me and have my own kind of responsibilities. I won't have your own responsibilities too. Maybe I got lucky that I like business and it made less of a problem for me. But if I find music as my passion, I might throw tables and drinks in my father's private room for me to be able to pursue it too," Serkan soothed him.

They were quiet and continued to eat their food while suddenly Serkan started speaking again, "The more I think maybe it's right, Wyn. Maybe you should try business like your father asked. Maybe you could find that it is really not your path or maybe that path is not so bad. Either way, you have to try to decide whether it is to give up or to hold it, right?"

"You're right. I should have given it a try, indeed," Wyn said after giving much thought. He could think later after trying the job. For now, it was even unimaginable he was about to go work like businessmen do. He even hated to socialise and have connections. But he needed to go through it to finally say that he really hated it so much. "Juniper and Rayinu will be here alone, then," Wyn commented.

Serkan chuckled, "Both like quietness. They will miss us so much."

Wyn shrugged, "You are the only one who is loud in this group. They might miss me but certainly, they throw a party in silence seeing you off for a month."

"Oh, shit. You are right," Serkan smirked. "I need to hug y'all before I go."

Wyn gave an ick face.