MyStandIN: Back to Joe (alternate ending)

16- In the same boat

Vibrations, Ming's phone. A message appeared on the app. We finally arrived at our destination. Even though I tried to squeeze information out of him during the ride, he would not budge.

Curious, I got out of the car first. An unfamiliar alley, passers-by, street vendors, noisy cars. After settling in, Ming took my hand, guiding me through the chaotic traffic. Further down, a deserted alley, to where? Last building on the block, a highway, endless waves on the horizon, Khao Praya River's Pier 5. The traffic light turned green, we made our way past the foreigners' counters to the yellow ferry waiting. Ming took us two tickets. Both excited, we sat under the tarp of the half-filled boat, close to the waves, seeking their coolness in the ambient heat.

- I haven't been here for a long time !

Here and in my former life, although I lived by the river. I spent my time in the city looking for some luck, opportunities they so ften told me about in the industry.

- The sound of the waves...

My arms folded on the edge of the boat, the ebb and flow was gently rocking my troubled mind.

- You're soo close... but still absent somehow !, Ming noticed.

Puzzled, I turned to him.

- What are you dreaming about, Joey?

A fleeting smile. I had not been dreaming for a long time. Surviving was hard enough every day. I could not waste time on fantasies, not knowing where I would wake up tomorrow.

- Since I'm back... Would you like to... leave?

My blood ran cold.

- Is that what you want?

Once again the guy next to me randomly blew hot and cold.

- That's not what I mean...I...

After a quick stop, people leaving, others coming in, the boat's engine fired up. I could not hear his voice. Was it worth trying? Facing me, Ming was waiting to explain himself.

- Understood, I'll just tell Mom that...

My voice became hoarse.

- No, it's not what I mean!, he clarified.

A long sigh, another silence of his.

- You've taken great care of her, this home.

I was caught off guard.

- Don't you have any dreams? Things you want to accomplish?

Yes of course, in my previous body... I was full of ideas, positive energies and hope.

- I don't want you to feel trapped... prisoner of anything... when I'm here and capable.

At these words, my gaze got lost on the horizon again.

- What do you dream of, Joey? What did you want in the other life but didn't have time for... what could you turn into reality these days?

Ming took my hand in his, closing his fingers on mine.

- How... can I help you?

My chest swelled hearing his words.

- Why would you want to do this ? You don't know anything about me... I'm not a saint like you think !, I warned him.

Plunging his eyes into mine, Ming moved closer, our knees touching.

- I see a wonderful person with a big heart... his mind in the clouds... sometimes lost. More there, than here. I wish this person could come down on earth, stay with me, for a while.

My heart was heavy, breathing was a arduous task.

- We spent lots of time together... slept together... What could you possibly be scared of?

Ming was hanging on my lips. Words could not find their way to my throat. My heart was beating fast.

- We've got 20 minutes to the next stop... 2 hours to the terminus... It's going to be a long journey if you give me the silent treatment.

My anxious thoughts were tangling, I bit my lips. Ming gently laid his head on my shoulder. The wind was soft on my skin. The weather had cooled down, the boat was continually filling up. Students deep in their books, retired folks telling yesteryear's stories, children with their mothers, young couples, all taking part in the joyful hubbub that unexpectadly made my heart lighter. I turned to Ming, his eyes were closed. He must have dozed off. In the distance, birds were taking off, seeming to soar higher than the clouds.

- I'd like to leave... for some time... A few weeks maybe...

Ming swiftly opened his eyes.

- I thought that...

- I'm all ears Joey.

- On vacation... somewhere by the sea... has been a long time and... founding a standins school one day...

- Sometimes I'm jealous of you... You have this killer bod, a loving Mum, a wonderful soon-to-be boyfriend, ambitious projects...

Again Ming managed to make me laugh. He gently held out his arms, put them around my waist, reminding me of the previous night.

- Ming... not here...

The lad straightened up in his seat with a serious look.

- I'm glad it's you.

He took a deep breath, laid his right hand on my knee.

- We can talk about your past if you want to... But don't live there forever...

Frowning, my eyes were questioning him.

- It's gone like those waves your sight is lost on... Isn't it time to lift your head, look ahead, at the horizon?

Ming turned my face to the bank, straightened my chin. Temples, blocks, greenery, buildings under construction that seemed to reach for the skies.

- I had lots of time to think about all this. Despite the grief I caused my mother, the harm I might've done to other people, I've been given another chance to start afresh... with someone who's been through the same trials.

Ming turned my chin towards him, affectionately laid my head on his shoulder.

- I don't want to pass it up. What about you Joey?