One Direction Preferences

You die

Liam: “So full of life and joy, when she was with us. Now she can take that and share it with anyone she meets wherever she is.” the pastor says. It brings tears to my eyes again, and they continue to fall out. I sat in the back of the church, alone. I didn’t want to see anyone, and I didn’t want anyone to see me like this. Depressed, sad, lonely. But what else was to be expected, how else was I supposed to react to Y/N leaving me here all alone. Sure I really wasn’t alone, but it felt that way. My friends and her family would stop by, but it didn’t make up for the fact I would never see her again. God I really was saying goodbye forever. Never again would she laugh at one of my stupid jokes, or smiles at me after I got home from work, or even just grab my waist as she fell asleep. The services were over, and I ducked outside so no one could see me, or ask how I was. I waited until everyone had left, then I walked back to her coffin. I stopped and looked at the closed lid. “It isn’t fair you know.” I began sitting on the floor in front of it. “None of this is fair. I… I just wish that.” I stopped, I could wish for a lot of things but it would do no good. “I just wish you hadn’t left me here alone.” I mumbled looking at my hands. I was startled when a voice said “You’re not alone mate.” I spun around and saw Louis standing there, hands in his pockets. “Listen Louis, I know,  but.” he stopped me. “I know you feel like we aren’t enough, and that’s fine, but you still have her. You know, always with you in the back of your mind.” he said, crouching next to me. “It’s not the same Lou. I miss her.” I said now starting to cry over her again. “I know, but she’ll always love you alright?” I nodded, just like I knew I would never find anyone to replace her. I looked one last time at the casket, and grabbed a rose from the wreath next to it. I gently placed the red rose on her casket and murmured “I love you, I always have and I always will. See you soon ok?” I choked out, biting my knuckle. Louis grabbed my shoulder, supporting me as I walked out, still feeling alone, without any trace of her.

Harry: I took one of her one of her stupid stuffed animals and chucked it across the room. I then proceeded to pick it up and squeeze it tightly. Like there was this sensation I got whenever I held something of hers. I was cleaning out our room, but it was never used anymore. I couldn’t bear to step inside of it a few months after she died, and I had just mustered up enough courage to start to go through her things. I had just walked into the dusty room, and already, I was pissed, at everything. How nobody saved her, how she didn’t tell me what she was feeling, but mostly at myself for not saving her. I should have known, I should have been able to tell that something was bothering her. I sighed and threw the stuffed animal into the box, then started in her dressers. I was doing ok, folding her clothes fastly, not paying attention to them, so nothing would come back to me. I had just cleared another drawer out and opened the last one, when I hit the wall. Right on top was her wedding dress. I pulled it out and laid it on the bed. She looked so beautiful that day, just like any other. “I miss you.” I muttered hugging the dress up, drinking in it’s scent. It still smelled of her, her flowery perfume. I threw the dress in a box, but grabbed it up a few minutes later and sat bawling like a child into it. “I don’t know what to do anymore, I don’t know what to do.” I whispered. I sat there for what felt like hours before I finally recovered, and finished her clothes. I placed the dress on the bed, and even laid my suit out on the bed next to it. I looked at the two imaginary people and my heart lifted a little. At least I could still be with her in some way. I closed the door, and left them in privacy.

Zayn:Just a couple. I thought, looking at the small white pills. Just a few would bring me back to her. I could finally hold my baby again, I could hold her close and tell her she didn’t have to be alone anymore. I loved her and it almost killed me when she died in my arms. It was slow and painful and honestly, I wished nothing more than to take her place, to ease her pain, to not have her look at me with so much pain, but here I was. I would have been lucky to die with her, to not have to endure the constant hole that consumed me. I wasn’t myself, and I didn’t like the new one. Just a couple. I thought again, struggling to get the top off. “Come on love, let me join you.” I said as if she was the force stopping me from getting the top off. After another minute, I finally got the bottle open. These were sleeping pills, and if I took enough, I knew that I would sleep, forever.I poured out a handful, and swallowed them whole. “Zayn, hey man.” I heard and I panicked. I struggled with the cap when Harry walked in. He say me with the bottle and ran over, dropping the mail he had collected. “Shit, how many did you take?” he asked, after I had began to wobble, losing sight of the real world. “Y/N, I’m coming love. Wait for me.” I stuttered as my vision blurred and i felt pressure around me, and I heard yelling. Then there was nothing, I felt nothing, and I heard nothing. This must be what death is. I thought, but then light was in my eyes, along with the sound of panicked voices, and beeping machines. I looked around, and saw Harry sitting there, speaking frantically on a phone, and the rest of the boys talking with each other. “Fuck you Harry.” I spat our, rubbing my temple. “Hey man, how do you feel?” I let my mouth drop then I yelled with anger “I feel like shit Harry. How the fuck do you think I feel? I was almost there, I almost had her again, and you screwed it up.” hot angry tears now flooding down my cheeks. I didn’t even know where my anger was coming from, but it was there. “Listen mate, she wouldn’t have wanted you to do that. Alright? She needs you here for a little while longer.” Louis said, looking at me sympathetically. I let the tears fall silently and nodded knowing he was right. But I still wanted to be with her. “Listen, you’ll get her back one day, but until then, make some stories to tell her once you do.” Niall said and I nodded again. I was hesitant at first, but I knew Y/N would want to hear as many stories as I could tell her, I had to get busy.