The games people play By fvdv123

Chapter 1

Disclaimer:

Mrs. J.K., Yep, Inspiration kicked me in the but again. No, I spend ten minutes looking at my screen, wondering what to type next… Meh, it fills my day, so I do this for free.

I am not certain if this counts as a crossover or not, I searched an hour for the appropriate category, and could not find one. So… you not like this? Buzz of dude. You like this? You are one with good taste, the best, the most beautiful, handsome… and if you are a guy… you are ok too.

Previous:

Nothing, it is the first chapter. There is another story: A frying pan did it. It is about the same old guy.

It begins the same though.

1 Don't jump in Black Holes!

You know, if you are on your deathbed waiting for the end… Yeah, breast cancer can you believe it? I didn't know guys could get that too. Unbelievable I know! I used to check my ex-wife regularly for it… I confess it wasn't always searching for nobs but what the hell? Then, when I found out, it was spread out too far, so amputating my breasts would not work. Those bastards did it anyway.

My stupid younger brother laughed his ass off when he heard I got 'titty cancer'… OK, he stopped laughing when he found out it was terminal.

Stupid fart felt guilty and visited me every other day. I heard he fell off some stairs and was in a coma in the next room. I laughed my ass off… I stopped laughing when I heard he can't survive when they pull the plug.

A professor did some experiments on my brother, that dumb ass donated his body to science. So here we lay… It did save traveling expenses for the family, you know two for the price of one. Anyway, I said my goodbyes to the kids and grandkids, the wife got lucky and found a better man ten years ago, yeah yeah, I can finally admit that. I am known to carry a grudge for a long, long time.

Where was I? Ah yes, deathbed, kids next to me, my other younger brother, my annoying sister... she got hit on her head with a Bible and is now nagging at me to go to the bloody Light. She can't stop nagging, she did it with mum too. Stupid Light.

WTF? There is a bloody Light! All those years I was arguing to sis over that Light and she is right? Hey, there is a Black Pit too… Let's avoid that one, I better not risk that. Though choices, Light or Dark… Aha! A Gray Light! I'll take that one. Nononono… It could be a trap! For all I know, there is someone on the other side ready to smack me with a frying pan!

Let us calculate my chances: I am not very religious, certainly not a bloody zealot, but not an evil one either. Yeah mainly because I can't lie. Honestly! Everyone can tell when I am lying. I tried to steal some candy in a shop and got busted. The wife asked me if a was faithful to her, a month later the divorce papers went through.

Where was I? Ah Light or Dark. You know, most religions have an exclusivity clause, You can't get in if you are not one of us. I have two options open, so I am in the right religion, or it is something completely different… …

Fuck it, I'll try the Black Hole. If it is Hell, maybe I will meet a Succubus. I jumped in the Black Hole.

Xxxxx

I woke up, feeling as if I was run over by a car. Believe me, I know the feeling, it happened once to me. A month in hospital and two to rehabilitate. A blue screen was floating in front of me: