Only You - LingOrm Unofficial Fanfic - (IraTawan)

Chapter 11: The Distance Between

It had been a couple of weeks since the shooting incident, but Ira couldn't shake the memory. The media had picked up on the story, though no one knew who the intended target was. Thanks to Tawan's quick thinking, the driver had sped off just in time, leaving the would-be attacker behind and the press guessing. To the public, it was an unfortunate incident at an otherwise uneventful celebrity event.

But Ira knew the truth. The shot had been meant for her. And since that night, Tawan refused to leave her side. Even on her off days, she'd station herself in Ira's apartment, silently watching over her, always alert. Tawan had become even more attentive—guarding Ira's every step, meal, and moment outside the penthouse. 

Surprisingly, Ira didn't find this increased protectiveness annoying, as she might have once. In fact, she found it endearing. Tawan's constant care made her heart warm, even though she knew what Tawan was doing—building a wall between them.

Ira had tried everything to make Tawan see how much she cared for her. Little hints, playful touches, lingering glances, but it was all in vain. Tawan remained stoic, smiling softly but never crossing that invisible line between them. Ira could sense it—Tawan was afraid of falling for her. She was determined to stay professional, to ensure Ira's safety at any cost, even at the expense of her own feelings.

And that worried Ira more than anything. She couldn't stand the thought of Tawan sacrificing herself for her. The nightmares had started shortly after the shooting. Almost every night, Ira would wake up at 3 AM, heart pounding, sweating, seeing Tawan's lifeless body in her dreams. She hated it. The fear of losing Tawan had become a constant, oppressive weight on her chest.

But as much as Ira begged Tawan to stay over, Tawan had refused after that one night. "I'm close enough," Tawan had said mysteriously, never revealing where she stayed. Ira had tried digging into Tawan's personal life, but every effort had been futile. Tawan was an enigma, always one step ahead, guarding her secrets as fiercely as she guarded Ira.

Despite this, Tawan had softened toward her lately. She smiled more, laughed at Ira's antics, and even allowed Ira to tease her occasionally. It was a small victory, but it made Ira feel closer to her.

Today, Ira was trying to balance a book on her head, mimicking the poses of a model. Tawan, ever watchful, placed a second book on top, testing Ira's stability. Ira, feeling mischievous, decided to drop the book on purpose and lunged playfully at Tawan from behind.

Tawan, always alert, sidestepped easily, catching Ira's wrist in a soft but firm grip. She twisted it gently behind Ira's back, locking her in place like a police officer subduing a suspect. They both laughed, Ira trying to wriggle free.

But in her playful struggle, Ira's nails accidentally scratched Tawan's upper cheek, drawing a thin line of blood.

"Tawan!" Ira gasped, her eyes widening in horror as she saw the small but visible cut. "I'm so sorry! Does it hurt? I didn't mean to!"

Her voice cracked with worry, and for the first time, Tawan saw real tears in Ira's eyes—tears that were meant for her. Something in Tawan's heart shifted at that moment. The way Ira was looking at her, the concern in her eyes—it made Tawan's chest tighten. Her heart was pounding, and she couldn't remember the last time she had felt this way.

"It's okay," Tawan said softly, trying to reassure her. But Ira didn't seem convinced. She kept her hands on Tawan's face, gently wiping the blood away, her fingers trembling.

"No, it's not okay. You're bleeding because of me. I hurt you," Ira whispered, her voice thick with emotion.

Tawan felt a wave of guilt wash over her. She couldn't let Ira be this upset over something so small. But more than that, Tawan realized that if Ira was this devastated by a scratch, how would she react if Tawan ever got seriously hurt? Or worse—if she died protecting her?

The thought sent a chill down Tawan's spine. Ira couldn't afford to care this much about her. It would only cause her more pain. Tawan couldn't let that happen.

"Stop," Tawan said, stepping back from Ira's touch. Her voice had turned cold, her walls slamming back into place.

Ira blinked, confused. "Stop? What do you mean, stop? I'm just worried about you."

"We are not right for each other," Tawan said, her voice icy, the words cutting like a blade.

Ira's face fell, her confusion deepening. "Not right for each other? What does that even mean? And what is right, Tawan?"

Tawan stood there, silent, unable to answer. She couldn't bring herself to tell Ira the truth—that she was in love with her, but could never act on it. That she was terrified of what might happen if she let herself feel. Ira deserved to be safe, not burdened by a love that would only put her in more danger.

The silence stretched on, and Ira's hurt was palpable. Her eyes shimmered with unshed tears, and Tawan could see the heartbreak she had caused.

Without another word, Ira turned and walked away, her shoulders hunched, her steps heavy with sorrow. Tawan watched her go, the weight of her own emotions pressing down on her like a vice. She had done the right thing, hadn't she? Keeping Ira at a distance, ensuring her safety above all else—that was the priority.

But as Ira's figure disappeared from view, Tawan realized with a sinking feeling that she had made the biggest mistake of her life. She had hurt the person she loved most, all in the name of protection.

And now, she had to live with the consequences.