The Book of Love

1992

"Driving to Barcelona now, of all times, was a crazy idea!" Marta complained, visibly stressed. Shortly after Toledo, the streets were already much busier and it hadn't taken long for them to get into the first traffic jam. This had been quite short, at 30 minutes, but now, not too far from the Catalonian city, they had got into a traffic jam again that would probably last much longer. And even though the air conditioning was fighting bravely, it was getting noticeably warmer in the car. Not to mention the fact that if this traffic jam lasted any longer, they might have to turn off the engine at some point.
Nevertheless, Fina only saw happy faces around her. It was obvious what the destination of most of them was.

The only one who was obviously not looking forward to Barcelona - even though they would finally see Luz and Begoña again - was Marta. Her forehead was more wrinkled than usual. She tapped the steering wheel with her fingers. Beads of sweat slowly formed on her forehead.
Fina knew that it wasn't just the traffic jam. She had been in a bad mood all week, probably because of the tax audit of the foundation, which hadn't gone too well. And when Fina had cautiously suggested that it might be time to leave such things to others, especially Julia, it hadn't helped to lift Marta's mood. Quite the opposite.
Fina understood. She understood that Marta loved their work at the foundation and would find it difficult to give it up. Or at least reduce it, that would be a start. She also understood that the stress and the heat were a strain. But Fina had little sympathy for the fact that Martas bad mood was increasingly affecting her.

"It's not too far now, Marta," she tried to calm her down. "You should have a drink."
"Not too far..." Marta snorted. "If this continues, we won't be there in another two hours. I don't know why I let myself be persuaded to come. We could have easily waited another four weeks. They've rebuilt the whole city for this, I hope we can even find our way."
"We wanted to greet Luz and Begoña shortly after their arrival and view their new apartment. You wanted that, especially."
"You could have reminded me that a mad invasion is imminent," Marta grumbled.
"They're sports fans in a good mood, I actually think it's quite nice. Unlike you, most of them smile at me despite the traffic jam."
"Good for them and good for you."
They had only gone a few meters before the line of cars came to a halt again. Marta groaned.
"Have a drink, Marta." Fina handed her the water bottle.
"Can you please stop treating me like an old woman all the time?"
"Treating you like an old woman all the time?" Fina asked in disbelief. "I'm just trying to make sure you're okay, that's all."
"Yes. But it bothers me. You're always trying to take everything off my hands, telling me to work less. Or you hassle me with drinks or fluff pillows. If it starts with you telling me to eat my vegetables, then..."
"You're accusing me of worrying about you and trying to take care of you, Marta."
"Yes."
"Yes?"
"You used to bring wine, not water. You fed me dessert, not added vegetables to my plate. You were the dessert, my goodness! You didn't fluff the pillows, you pushed me onto the pillow. When I worked too hard, you argued with me and yelled at me."
"You want me to yell at you?" Fina stared at her again in disbelief.

"For heaven's sake, Fina... no... yes, maybe... I don't know..." Marta stared out the window. "I want us to remain us. Even when I'm 85 and you're 73, like me now. I want us to tease each other. Get each other worked up. Make each other laugh. Try new things. I still want passion and... and... everything else. And not matching jogging suits on the couch, in front of the TV."
"We don't even have jogging suits. But I'm sure," Fina pointed to the cars around them, "one of them could help us out with that."
Marta let out another rumbling groan. "Am I still your wife, Fina? Or am I slowly becoming a project for you to take care of, like your father?"
Fina was so surprised she could hardly answer.
"I'm serious, Fina. Am I still your wife?"
"Marta, stop it. This is silly. And it's starting to make me angry."
"Am I still your wife? The woman you so often literally worshipped with your eyes? The woman you provoked and challenged? And vice versa? The woman you wanted to escape with? The woman you so often rendered speechless? The woman you could never keep your hands off, even in the most impossible and dangerous moments?" Marta looked Fina in the eye. "Am I still your wife?"