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JACKSON WAS DONE WITH theway things were going, so just a few weeks later he found himself parked outside of Y/Ns home, tears spilling from his eyes while he sat there, just simply staring. He wanted her, he desired her, he craved her. He truly didn't know what he was going to do without her now that he knew how she was. All of the other times he's obsessed over her was only because she existed throughout his mind, but now, he had her, and he wanted her some more.
His chest rose and fell while he bit down on his lip, his mind all clouded from the huge wave of mixed emotions that hit him like a bus. He gulped and kept each of his hands tight on the wheel. Considering if he shoulder crash into the luxurious home or not, he then turned his head down and started to sob some more. Heart yearning for the older woman, he gripped his hands tighter around the wheel.
"I... I can't do that. I.. I just need to speak to h-her.... She'll understand...!" The redhead mumbled to himself with a sweaty face and his voice sounding almost stuffed. Of course he had no idea what he was doing at her home, he just wanted to look at it for comfort, but now that he was there, he knew he wouldn't be able to just go.
Straightening himself up, the blue eyed man pulled his head back and let it rest against the seat for a moment as he took a deep breath. Flickering his eyes back open, he pursed his lips and placed his hand on the handle, wasting absolutely no time in pushing it open in the process.
He shut the door and began to walk right up to the home, but just as he was about to make it to the door it was pulled open to reveal the H/C haired woman standing there with a serious look against the features he thought were so beautiful. Now that's when his heart sank. Just thinking back to the photo she posted with the other man made him want to beg her to love him again, but he didn't want to humiliate himself.
"What are you doing here??" She asked, her eyebrows knitting as she leaned against the door a little bit. She didn't care if her tone sounded judging or rude, he'd basically just messed up her life, and not even too long ago. He had the audacity to show up to her house.
Jackson shifted in his stance and continued to purse his lips, the same pleading look in his eyes returning from before. That made her feel a little guilt but it wasn't enough to make her facade fade away. All she did in her mind was keep reminding herself why she was even upset in the first place, and since the reason why wasn't small at all, it wasn't hard to hide her displeasure for him.
Shaking his head from side to side, the teen stuffed each of his hands deep into his pockets and didn't dare look away from her. "I... I really wanted to see you... Y-Y/N, I'm so sorry for fucking with your career. I didn't mean to. I only wanted to gain your attention-"
"You wanted to get my attention so you make up these stories to fuck with my work??!" Y/N told him, her voice growing louder and louder with each syllable that passed her mouth. Now Jackson didn't know what to do. He realized it was going to be a lot harder to gain her love and trust once again.
Sniffles were the only thing heard from the ginger for a minute, but then he thought to himself and tried to put the perfect words to say together, he just hoped they would work, "I'm sorry!! You weren't answering my texts, calls, or emails..!! I just... I fucking want you to love me, please, Y/N...!"
It was clear the young man was about to enter a breakdown, and Y/N really didn't want anybody else to notice, so she scrunched up her face, sucked up all of her feelings in and took a step to the side, showing him that he was allowed in. The people that lived around her knew who she was, they just tried not to disturb her peace and she was thankful for that, so she wanted to return the gesture as well.
Jackson paused for a second and let his jaw drop while the rest of his small tears streamed down his face. She sent him the same serious look as before and he stood straight, his eyes never leaving hers as he walked right into the house, listening to the sound of her closing the door behind the both of them.
"Jackson. You need to understand that me and you are never going to happen again. Ever." The harsh tone in her voice made the redhead want to crumble onto the ground, yet he didn't do that. He was just glad she even let him in her house again. It felt like he was getting even closer and closer to her loving him and his delusions seemed even stronger for some reason.
The boy snapped out of his thoughts and crossed his arms while he stepped closer to her, noticing the small goosebumps that grew on her arm due to that action, "But why...? It isn't that big of an age difference. It's not like you can be my mom..."
"Ugh, I don't even want to think about what your mom goes through." Y/N mumbled, still making sure it was loud enough for him to hear. She raised a few fingers up to her forehead, pushing away some of her hair before she rubbed against her forehead, a low groan erupting from her throat, causing Jackson to wonder why she was so stressed already.
The huge wave of silence was enough to make Jackson's stomach turn, but he couldn't say anything to her. He didn't even know how he was speaking with her for this long. All he knew was that he felt so much guilt for ruining her image but it was too late now.
A look of sadness formed over Y/Ns face and the male was quick to notice that, but the second he decided he was going to say something about it, she beat him to it. She whipped her head back up at him and shook her head, her E/C eyes tearing up as she did so. The fact that she was face to face with someone that broke her down just a few weeks ago made her feel off. "How could you do this to me?? Like seriously, I don't understand it.."
"I.. don't know... I'm crazy, Y/N... I don't know why I do things... All I know is.. I can be better if I have you by my side... You have to believe me...!" His smooth voice was barely above a whisper as he told her that, but it brought her absolutely no comfort at all. It actually made her feel horrible on the inside. He wasn't seeing where she was truly coming from.
Now it was her turn to sniffle as she stared at him, then for a moment it felt like he'd been paralyzed. He watched her own salty tears go down her cheeks. He didn't want her to feel the way he felt just a minute ago. "You claim to love me, but you ruined my life..."
