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"WHAT YOU MEAN LILAH" JAYC says looking at me. "Exactly what I said.. this is all a mistake. We're suppose to be friends what the fuck are we doing?!" I say a little louder. "If you didn't want to do it you wouldn't have been kissing back." Jayc says stern. "Okay I'm saying we don't need to do this anymore." I say calmly trying to keep this conversation calm.
"You right let me go do the same shit with Nadia you gon pop up at my door like a fucking crazy person." He says loudly. "No I won't." I say, still calmly. "You did though." He says getting up being way more loud. "I told you why I did it, I didn't even know she was over there. I told you I didn't care. You insisted on coming to my house. You insisted that our friendship was more important then whatever you have with her." I say calmly. "Whatever Delilah." He says before leaving out and not to long after that I hear my garage door alarm, meaning he left my house. I tried to text him but they weren't going through.
I just turned on Frank Ocean and wrote I'm my journal.
The day I lost my "friend" or that's what I thought we were
Today, and the day before today were very weird. The things he did to me were weird considering we were just friends. But I couldn't say I didn't like it. But I hate uncertainty in a relationship. Not knowing what you are with someone could tear down your personality, and I don't love anybody enough to lose myself. I tried to have a calm talk with him and surprisingly he got aggressive with me, he's never done that. He's always been so calm with me. Now I've lost one of my favorite friendships, my bestfriend Lelah told me this wasn't going to work. But you know me, I just.... dont.... listen.
Jayvon Wilson(2)
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I DIDN'T KNOW WHO I COULD TELL bout how I feel because nobody knew about what we been doing these past days. I figured I would tell my older brother, Justin, to see what would be do.
"Mannnnn what the fuck." Justin says reacting to all the information I told him. "I know I know" I say shaking my head. "Well for one that's your man's sister two yall suppose to be friends? She didn't say anything wrong." He says looking at me with one eyebrow up. "Bro I know."
"What you like her or some?" He says with the most confused face ever. "No."
"You do. Nigga you ain't do that shit for no reason." He says still with a confused look on his face. "I guess." I say. "So again, do you like her? Fuck you gon lie to me for?"
"Bro yes." I say finally openly admitting the feelings I thought would never escape my brain. "So you already fucked up." He says putting his hand over his face. "You should've just been straight up, you being confusing which obviously bothers her." He adds. "Man you don't know shit." I say mugging him. "Okay don't listen, not my problem."
"When you shooting yo music video so I can pop out" He says purposely changing the topic. "Next weekend but I want-"
"I know just try and make things right and be responsible and respectful. You being weird to girls make them not want to fuck with you." He says cutting me off. "I'm not being weird. I feel like what am I being loyal and being good to a girl for if they not my girl." I say causing my brother to smack his forehead. "You not gon get a girl being fucked up to girls, that ain't how it works"
"Everything I say and do you say is wrong." I say bluntly. "Because it is. But like I said don't get it together, don't listen. That's fine." Justin says before hanging up. "Bro." I mumble under my breath. I just got on the game and tried to get my mind off it but I couldn't. I was playing 2k then I got a FaceTime call from Mar. When I answered it he looked he was upset, then I already knew. I felt like he knew what just went down. My heart dropped to my ass. "Bro." Was the first word he said before he took a long pause.
"Why them K block niggas dick riding you. He said making all weight leave off of my shoulders. "What you mean?" I say bluntly, trying not to show how relieved I am.
"They talking about how you not really outside, and you just an internet ass nigga."
"Man," I say shooing at my camera "nobody worried about them niggas."
I started focusing back on the game. "What we gon do bout it wtf?" He said in shock I didn't care bout it. "I got bigger issues right now Mar, just ignore it right now."
"No girl is more important than something our homeboy died for."
"Okay so what happen to our homeboy, for us,should be a lesson learned not an excuse to make more bad decisions." I say and Mar just goes silent. "I guess.." He says. "We'll get to them niggas when we get to them, again, I got bigger issues." Mar nods and we say our goodbyes.
I got bored so I decided to hop on live. "Wassup guys." I say looking at the camera then at the TV, playing my game. "Me and her not talking right now." I say bluntly, not taking my eyes off the TV.
"Ya I'm done with Nadia, I'm not talking to Lilah right now. Stop asking bout them."
"Nah it's Ight, new music coming soon. Bye." I say ending the live. I think about what I'm about to do but I just do it. I go to Lilah's contact and unlock her.
