Contrary Hearts

Chapter 6: This Little Piggy Went to Cheer Practice

When I walk into cheer practice, I see all the other girls getting ready, lacing their shoes and pulling up their hair. I spot Riley and her posse sitting on the bleachers, chatting amongst themselves as they wait for the other girls to show up. Coach walks in a second later, pointing at each one of us as she silently does a head count.

"Alright, ladies," she calls once everyone's accounted for. "Get stretching, and then we can practice doing some throws."

Riley groans loudly at the throws part, looking over at me in disgust. She takes her index finger and pulls her nose up, and even from a distance I can hear the oinking noises she's making. My stomach pangs, and I'm suddenly conscious of how my thighs barely have a gap, how my belly pudges out when I eat anything; self conscious about the way my arms move when I wave and the amount of chins I get when I laugh.

Coach's voice cuts through my thoughts, pulling me from my self-hating barrage. "Let's go ladies, no time to waste!"

With that, all of the girls get to the floor, warming up. I sit on the ground and stretch my body forward, grabbing the tips of my shoes and leaning my body against my legs. Laughter drifts towards me, and when I get back up I notice Riley and Kaylee laughing at me. Kaylee grabs her 'back fat' and pulls on it, pointing at my back with a sick grin.

I try my best to ignore it, but God I just want to kick those annoying bitches in the face. However, being the bigger person- ouch -I let it slide. We go on to practice our routine for Saturday's game, and Coach tells the flyers to get with their respective team mates. Previously, Riley and the other girls I was close with on the cheer team were the ones throwing me, but after yesterday's debacle, I don't trust them with my safety.

Unfortunately, I don't have much of a choice- All the other girls are either already paired up or too absorbed in their own practice to notice me lingering. With a sigh, I drag my feet over, my water bottle clutched tightly in my hand. Riley's grin widens as I approach, my steps hesitant, my heart pounding in my chest. Her gaze flicks over me, appraising, like I'm a piece of meat at the butcher's.

"Hope you girls have been hitting the gym," Riley teases, her voice sugary sweet but with an unmistakable edge. Her eyes sweep over me one last time, and then she delivers the blow. "We've got our work cut out for us, huh, little piggy?"

The words hit like a gut punch, and all of a sudden, I'm not in the gym anymore. I'm ten years old, standing in a department store dressing room. The air is thick with the smell of stale fabric, and the fluorescent lights burn down from above, making everything feel too bright, too harsh. I'm standing there in front of the mirror, tears streaking down my face, as my mom struggles to pull a shirt down over my belly. It's too small, and the fabric stretches painfully tight. My mom huffs in frustration, wiping sweat from her brow, and finally gives up. She slumps onto the bench behind me, exhausted and disappointed.

"I mean, seriously, Ava," she sighs, her voice sharp as the scolding words hit me like daggers. "You need to lose some weight. You're too big for... everything. Stop being such a little piggy."

The memory feels so vivid, and I can almost feel the fabric clinging to me, the heat rising to my cheeks as shame washes over me. But then, like a rubber band snapping back, I'm yanked back into the present by a sudden sharp pain in my hand. My vision clears, and I realize I'm no longer standing still. Coach has a firm grip on my arm, dragging me away as a shrill scream pierces the room.

"Ava!" Coach says, her voice stern, but there's confusion in her eyes as she shakes her head. "I'd tell you to go to the principal's office, but... well, she's already home for the day." Coach sighs, scratching the back of her head, clearly at a loss for what to do. "Just go home, alright?"