The King's Eye

Chapter 39

Time blurred into passing hours as my body floated in the fountain's water, rocking back and forth in the mist spraying through the air. Above me, the moonlight outlined my limbs, incandescent wings at my sides sweeping back and forth aimlessly. It was when I stopped paddling my arms through the water that my mind began to scream. The stillness became too suffocating.

Limiting inevitable mental drowning, I let my toes wiggle against the weight of liquid in slight kicks. With hands overhead guiding me around the walls, I pushed off in large bounds floating my way across the lake size fountain.

As the words began to flood back into my mind in rage, I let myself sink down. How could he do this, my mind screamed. How could he lie to me? The freezing water of late summer made my lungs burn quicker than anticipated, the need for breath and warmth growing every second.

I sat up, letting my legs sink down to the mossy floor of the fountain as the gasp of air wretched from me.

"Sophie." Jacques stood at the edge of the fountain with my robe in his arms.

Pushing myself up carefully with my hands, I waded through the knee deep water to where he stood. The coolness of moisture on my skin made it more obvious my chemise was translucent after being submerged for so long. My husband's eyes wandered along my body, his jaw feathering as he clenched it. "Thank you," I said, grabbing the robe from him and wrapping its warmth around me.

He reached for me, lovingly. His hand went for my waist and then dropped down to his side when I stepped away. I hated how much I wanted to feel his hands on me, his thumb brushing against my ribs. "How long have you been out here?" He asked, clearly trying to break any tension that lay between us.

I shrugged in response, busying my hands with rebraiding my hair. Tangled strands grabbed onto my fingers in loops, leaving me frustratedly ripping through each one.

His hands stopped mine, ever so softly pulling them away from my hair. Replacing mine, his fingers brushed through every tangle without tugging away, careful not to rip any tendril I had plaited out of place. As badly as I wanted to pull away from him, every instinct in me fought to stay.

In awe at how he could braid hair without fumbling and so calmly, I sunk into the feeling of his fingers weaving hair over and under, back and forth. His touch was light as moved down until tying off the bottom with a string and pinning it up in a low bun at my neck. He finished my braid as I internally fought repulsion, the awe slipping away momentarily.

Repulsed that he schemed his way to my hand and lied about something as important as working for Francis. Tenderness in his touch down my neck made all the thoughts melt away, though. I sighed, aggravated with my mind and heart who could not choose what path to follow.

By pushing Jacques away I went against everything I had promised him. To keep him near though, my breath hitched at the thought.

He had worked for Francis. Francis. A man who hurt me mentally and physically. Who tore me down and thought me incapable. He knew what he did to me and still earned his pay from him. An ache began to web its way across the back of my eyes as the thoughts came flooding back in chaotically. How I wanted to go back into the water and escape them.

Dark eyes met mine as I glanced at the falling water, dismal in the moonlight. "Can we talk about it?" His Adam's apple bobbed as he swallowed. "Sophie, I wanted to tell you...everything. I just... was afraid. For the first time in my life I was truly afraid. Losing you is something I cannot withstand. I've lost everything else, but you." He let out a shuddering breath, his hands rubbing at his face. Taking a step closer to me, my body went rigid as his hand moved to my face. The back of his hand grazing my cheek. "It wouldn't redeem me to tell you everything and let you in, but it would help you understand."