Kaia sighs as she walks home from school in the January wind. She was wearing skinny jeans, a band tee and a grey over sweater. She went to Options For Youth a couple miles from her house.
Once getting home, she walks into her room and lays on her bed. Kaia doesnt have much energy as she did a few months ago. Thats what depression was. At least for her. Never having energy. Having to force herself to do simple things like eating. Not that she really wanted to anyways. Anorexia was also with her. Haunting her thoughts. Making her see her believe she was fat, though she weighed 90 lbs.
She had a lot of these demons. Self Harm, which caused so much relief yet so many lines acorss her skin. Making it to where she forced herself to wear shorts.
Multi-Personality Disorder, which made her many different people. Being many people made it hard to make friends. Which made her lonely, which made depression come in full force.
Bi-Polar disorder which made her moods change very quickly, every couple days. This mood change often scared her mother.
Schizophrenia, which caused hallucinations. The hallucinations where often scary though she has periods of time where its just the auditory hallucinations.
How she got thesedisorders? Well...Kaia was born into a loving family. Her family consisted of her mother, her father, and her older brother.
Her mother was a very loving soul. Allowed her to do and be whoever she wanted. As long as it wasnt harmful, or illegal of course.
Her father, well her father was a confusing man. Being Bi-Polar and having an outer explosive disorder, which meant he blacked out and would beat the crap out of whoever made him black out. But, as a child, Kaia was daddy's little girl. His monkey. His gress monkey. If daddy was out working on the car, so was Kaia. She was right there under the hood asking questions. They constantly played. He taught her how to be flexible. Then he left. Went away. He'd call. But she was slowly pulling away. Not talking to him. Giving up on the hope that he might come back. After, Kaia had given up all hope that her dad was coming back. Then he did. He was back. He acted like he never left. Which annoyed Kaia, him being gone from 4 til 15. She has a rocky relationship with her father. They wouldnt yell and scream at each other. They would simply ignore each other. When they happened to be in the same room, theyd interact but walking down the halls. It was like they where invisible to each other.
Her older brother was a confusing child. He has autism, which made him slower in the educational side of things. As children Kaia and Buddy would play all the time. Buddy would play with toys while Kaia prefered to actually be whatever she felt like, though learning compromise at a young age, she ended up playing with toys. As Buddy and Kaia grew up they separated. They arent so close. Which hurts Kaia. She loves him even if she doesnt understand him.
Kaia. Kaia is currently seventeen. She has been through a lot through she is only seventeen. When her father left she blamed it on herself. Feeling like she wasnt a good enough daughter to make stay. At five Kaia's mother remarried. Everything was okay. She became a daddys girl again. Constantly following her new father around. That was until her little was born. Once Makenzie was born, Kaia was six, Kaia was kinda shoved to the side. When she'd try and follow her father around she was told, "not right now." "Go away Kaia. Im busy." "Leave me alone." Kaia finally stopped being a daddys girl. She tried to turn to her mother, who was even busyer with the baby. Finally, she turned to her brother. He was very into games at this point and Kaia never had the patients for sitting still. She couldnt figure out the controls so she gave up quickly. She turned to the oldest of her new step sisters.
Molly was fourteen. She loved having Kaia around but often needed breaks from her to do chores or her school work. So Kaia turned to the youngest of her step sisters.
Kayon was 10. Kayon loved playing with Kaia. The played games like Barbie, though Kaia dispised Barbies she had someone to hang with so she wasnt to upset. She's listen to music and dance around the room with Kayon. Kayon quickly became her best friend.
Kaia didnt really mess with the other two. Kelly and Maria. Kelly was 12 and Maria was 11. They always told Kaia no when she tried to hang out with them so she stopped trying.
Her step father. Her stepfather, Julian, was a very happy man at first. He had a well paying job. He had a family. He had a loving wife and many loving children. He had everything. Until one day, Julian was at work, emptying a cement truck. The hose didnt go on properly and swung back taking him with it and slamming him on the ground. He ended up breaking his back and having surgery.
(TRIGGER WARNING!!!)
On her tenth birthday her mom went out to bingo. Her dad calls her to the back room and raped Kaia. When he was done he told her, "If you tell anybody, i will kill you and your mother."
(TRIGGER WARNING OVER!!)
Kaia never told. Until she was eleven. She ended up telling her best friend, who told her mom. Her friends mother called the cops. When he was arrested, they took Kaia's mom down to the police station and was questioned. She filed for a divorce and therapy for both her and Kaia, and went home to hug her child and apologize over and over for putting Kaia through that. Kaia could only respond with, "Its okay. You didnt know."
The court system was awful. They wanted to take Kaia, Makenzie, and Buddy from Kaia's mother for neglect. They never where taken though.
Julian was proven guilty on a non criminal charge, which meant he had to file as a sex offender but did no jail time for it.
Kaia started cutting in the seventh grade. First it was small, no blood. But they got bigger and deeper as the years went on.
While laying on her bed Kaia hears them. Or at least, her. Hearing voices, and not knowing what to call them, Kaia named them.
This one was Ana.
''Its almost dinner, Kaia. Are you going to break and eat like the fat ass you are."
Kaia sighs and shakes her head. Suddenly her moms smiling face is at the door.
"Kaia darling. Its dinner time." Her mother says in a sweet tone.
"Thank you, Mom but im not hungry." She replies with a smile.
Her moms face fell slightly and it broke Kaia's heart.
'Be strong Kaia. You don't want to be fat anymore. Remember?' Ana's voice says.
"Okay, but if you get hungry you know theres food." She says and shuts Kaia's door.
Kaia sighed and closed her eyes falling into a dreamless sleep.
(Sorry about this chapter. Its kinda a filler so hopefully it will get better! Love you guys!
-Starlight)
