A Thing Called Love

My Life

POV JULIETTE

I'm nervous. I'm so nervous.

Well, here's the story: I live here in Salt Lake, Utah, since... I was born. My mom is Brazilian and my father... I've never met. I live with her, my aunt, my grandma (who moved to Utah when I was 11) and my adopted older sister, Johanna. They are the women of my life. They're everything to me.

But what really changed our life (for better or for worse) was my diagnosis.

Since I was little, my family knew that I was, you know, different. I made really weird things when I was younger, that I don't like to talk about, but even I noticed that, and I hated myself because I wasn't like other children of my age, who did things that I couldn't do alone, like bathing alone, dressing alone, and many others, like sensory overload and for my stimming manners, that I still have.

Then, at 9 years old, I went to a neurologist with Mom, and I was diagnosed with Autism level 1. At first, we were distraught and a little shocked, because, of course, nobody is prepared to take care of a disabled child like me. But my Mom never gave up on me. She and my family still loved me and fighted so much for my rights, as any parent of a disabled child would do. Since my 13, I do therapy every two weeks, and since then, I'm doing very better. I started to eat new foods, I take my bath alone, I dress some clothes alone (except for brushing and touching my hair when it's wet, because, sensory), I like wearing some makeup, I understand better my feelings, but some things stay the same, like my stims and some manners I have.

But it didn't stop there. At the time I was diagnosed, I was so bullied and suffered the entire time, being called names like "weirdo", "retard", things like that; getting bad notes in my locker almost three times for month, being pranked, being isolated from everyone, and that was so much for me that I started to have anxiety attacks. Then I was diagnosed with anxiety disorder and depression.

That was when I told my Mom what was happening to me and she took me away from there.

And since 14, I started to study from home. It was the great time of my life.

And one of the things that helped me to save my life was movies and songs. Especially the ones from Disney. I know every line and every lyric from heart, and one of my dreams is being the greatest Autistic actress and singer of history, for helping to represent people like me on the screen and outside of it. I want to inspire. But sometimes I think that won't be realized, because I'm so shy.

Anyhoo, some weeks ago, my mom knew that the East High School (YES, the same school that the cast of High School Musical shot the movies!) was accepting new students, she matriculated me there with my permission, of course, and I can't wait to finally begin!

I just hope that everyone treats me okay.