sleep away at Camp Wiŋtke

Chapter 24

The following morning dawned with the same gentle morning sunlight that had greeted them every day of camp, juxtaposed with the jarring bright artifical light that lit up the interior of the cabin when a counselor came in to awaken those that werent yet up. The cabin stirred slowly, the rustling of sheets, muffled yawns, and complaints about the bright light punctuating the early quiet. Julie awoke with a start, her heart racing, as if the anticipation of what she might discover had jolted her out of sleep. She lay still, feeling the cool fabric of the nightgown against her skin, her eyes scanning the room, searching for any signs of the transformation she had so desperately wished for. The other campers began to stir, their movements tentative and sleep-laden.

Her hand slid down to her waist, her fingers expecting to encounter the softness of a girl's body, but instead, they met with the familiar firmness of her own. With a sinking feeling, she knew all too well that she was still a boy, her body unchanged. She had hoped so much, dreamed so deeply, but the reality remained the same.

Julie slipped the t-shirt over her head and tugged the jeans up over her legs. The sensation was almost foreign, nearly uncomfortable. For a week she had felt so free, so feminine in dresses, skirts, and bras, and now she was being forced back into the confines of what she had so desperately wanted to leave behind. She did not want to go home and in fact, dreaded returning to her male life.

"Ah, this is better," Terry called as he approached.

"Speak for yourself," Belinda chided her in a friendly tone.

After dressing, the three went to the big house for breakfast. They saw counsellor Amy and unlike all the campers, and most of the other counselors, she was dressed in her usual skort and workout top.

"Nobody sees me as anything but the girl I am," she informed them, responding to their question about why she wasn't in boy clothes. "I'll go back home and continue to live as a girl. I no longer have a 'boy mode'."

"Me neither," Rachelle beamed with excitement, having judt walked up with Daniela. "As of today I'm officially a girl. When I leave here I'll live every day of the rest of my life as a girl. "

Julie felt a pang of longing as she watched the easy confidence with which Rachelle spoke. She wished she could be so sure of herself, so certain of her own place in the world.

This being the morning of departure, the camp buzzed with a mix of excitement and sorrow. Goodbye hugs and teary exchanges of friendship bracelets filled the air as campers and counselors alike said their farewells.

Julie felt the weight of her impending return to the life of Albert heavier with each passing moment. She walked with Rachelle and Belinda to the bus, her feet dragging with the gravity of what was to come. Rachelle, in her usual supportive manner, offered a comforting smile. "Remember, you're not alone," she whispered, giving Julie's hand a gentle squeeze.

"I'll call you," Julie assured Rachelle before she and Belinda boarded their bus. Julie then headed toward her bus as Terry approached.

Julie felt a strange mix of emotions as she climbed up into the bus that would take her home. It was the same bus she had boarded a week ago. Now, as she stepped onto it, she felt like she was leaving a piece of herself behind. The seats were the same, the smell of diesel and dust was the same, but she was different.

Terry bounded up the bus steps, his own gym bag slung over one shoulder. He took the seat beside Julie, their thighs brushing together. "You okay?" he asked softly, his eyes searching hers for any signs of distress.

Julie managed a weak smile, trying to keep her voice steady. "I'm okay. Seriously nervous about going back and facing my parents, now they they know, you know?"

Terry nodded, understanding all too well. "Look, you've got Rachelle, and Daniela, and Belinda now. And me. We're all here for you."

"Yeah, but none of you'll be there when the bus pulls off and it's just me and my parents."

Julie took a deep breath, trying to draw strength from her friends' words. As the bus pulled out, the wheels crunching on the gravel, she watched the camp shrink into the distance, the pine trees and wooden buildings blurring together in a mosaic of memories she didn't want to lose. Rachelle and Daniela waved from their own bus, their expressions a mix of excitement for their new lives and sadness at saying goodbye to the haven they had all shared.

The ride home was a blur of countryside and chatter from the other campers, but Julie remained lost in thought for the majority of the trip. Her mind was racing with scenarios of how her reunion with her parents would go. Would they be understanding, or would they reject her? She knew she had to be brave, to stand firm in her convictions, but the fear gnawed at her stomach.

At one point Julie finally spoke to the other two. "I just want to know you as Terry and Belinda," Julie told the other two when that started talking about whether they should exchange real names along with their phone numbers.

"Yeah, I think you're right," Belinda agreed.

Terry was the first to be dropped off. They all hugged and wished him well. A short time later Belinda's stop came up. Both boys had tears in their eyes as they, hugged, exchanged a kiss on the cheek, and bid one other goodbye.
Before stepping off the bus, Belinda turned around and planted another quick peck on Albert, his lips tingling when Belinda's lips briefly touched his.

"Good luck." Belinda called back as she descended the bus steps.