Prologue

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I wouldn't necessarily call myself a nerd.

I don't think I fit the made-up criteria. But I guess if the only options are "Popular" and "Nerd", I'd probably pick Nerd. Sometimes it feels like that's how most people see it, you're either a popular kid or a loser. It's such a stupid way of looking at things.

I tend to keep to myself. Besides small talk, I don't really talk to people outside of those I already know. Not because I don't want to. I think a few people at this school aren't terrible, I guess the situations never line up. And I'll be damned the day I go up to someone I think is cool and be the one to initiate the conversation. It's actually shocking when someone remembers my name. (And it makes me feel awful when I don't know their name)

Sometimes it feels like I'm invisible. I can walk down a hall and most people won't notice or care. A part of me likes it. I don't have to worry about holding up appearances and talking to people I don't like. But it's also kinda lonely. I'm not obvious of the fact that some nerds at this school would kill to be invisible. And I'm not obvious to the reason why.

Not having to deal with Max Jägerman.

Sure, the occasional name-calling was a given and he might have shoved me into a locker at one point but that was more of a case of wrong place wrong time. Other than that Max doesn't really bother me and for that I'm grateful. I've seen the way he treats some of the people at this school. Like a stereotypical jock from an 80s movie. It's honestly crazy that he hasn't been suspended yet. I suppose that's what he gets for being the star player on the football team. But because Max Jägerman leaves me alone it means everyone else leaves me alone too. Other than that one time in freshman year but that was just people spreading rumours.

Sometimes I wish I put myself out there more. Made more friends. It doesn't matter at this point though. After all, I'm a senior, I graduate in June and I'll be leaving this school. I'll probably never talk to 99% of people at this school after graduation anyway. I mean, realistically how much could the next few months impact my life?


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Author Notes:

I literally finished writing this in the waiting room before my therapy session lol

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