//chapter fifty-two
• the laughter of Icarus*tw: light mentions of SA & r#pe
read with care.
TWELVE HOURS PRIOR, Andrew had a lot of regrets, mostly because he thought he was going to die. And currently, if there was any advice he could give someone, there'd be a lot of it. For one, you're going to be 17 for only 365 days. And you could die at 18. When your sister asks if you want to sleep in her bed, say yes. One day she'll be in a hospital bed and there won't be enough room to make up for right now. Stop cancelling plans; go out and use your legs while they work.
You're guaranteed nothing.
Stop denying affection. You'll never be able to love someone as a teenager at 35. Someone, many someone's, are going to tell you they love you. Don't keep quiet because you've been told it's too soon. If you love them, say so. Be brutally, painfully honest.
Go out and change the world. Be a little more like Kie. Fight for peace, equality and change. When you're 70 and can only watch the news all day you don't want to see the same issues will going on when you had every chance to fight it.
Stop romanticizing the "I don't need anybody" and "I don't have feeling" attitude. It's easier to make friends in high school than in nursing homes. Embrace feelings and intimacy. Don't apologize for caring and don't let anybody make you feel guilty for caring even if it's one sided.
You're only a teenager for 2,555 days and then you're 20. Life never slows down. Bones become fragile and break, people die, and hearts become weak.
With every atom in your body, live right now.
The best kind of people are the ones that come into your life, and make you see the sun where you once saw clouds. The people that believe in you so much, you start to believe in you too. The people that love you, simply for being you.
The only trick of friendship, is to find people who are better than you are-not smarter, not cooler, but kinder, and more generous, and more forgiving-and then to appreciate them for what they can teach you, and to try to listen to them when they tell you something about yourself, no matter how bad— or good—it might be, and to trust them, which is the hardest thing of all. But the best, as well.
The once in a lifetime kind of people.
Sarah was thirteen the first time she cried over a boy. That day it rained so loud that Tannyhill crumbled every time they moved. They made soup so hot it burned their throats then drew tears on cheeks with thick black permanent markers and danced until the floorboard creaked. Which is to say, Andrew's bones still carry the memory of that night in them.
Kie's a composition of a person. She likes borrowing novels from the library, but she forgets to read them, and her favorite chocolates are KitKats but she's boycotting Nestle so she won't buy them. She hates the taste of coffee but she drinks it for the aesthetic, she dreams in French, and can't read music but she can play guitar. She learnt to sew from old magazines, she says she doesn't believe in astrology but she's defensive if people insult it.
YOU ARE READING
MR. I HATE YOU ──ᴊ. ᴍᴀʏʙᴀɴᴋ
Hayran Kurgu𝐦𝐫. 𝐢 𝐡𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 ᵇᵒʸˣᵇᵒʸ ʲʲ ᵐᵃʸᵇᵃⁿᵏ ❝"𝙄... 𝙛𝙪𝙘𝙠𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙝𝙖𝙩𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪." "𝙁𝙚𝙚𝙡𝙞𝙣𝙜'𝙨 𝙢𝙪𝙩𝙪𝙖𝙡, 𝘾𝙖𝙢𝙚𝙧𝙤𝙣." "𝙂𝙤𝙤𝙙." 𝘼𝙣𝙙𝙧𝙚𝙬 𝙖𝙜𝙧𝙚𝙚𝙙 𝙖𝙨 𝙝𝙚 𝙪𝙨�...