D-after hearing all of that are you sure you want to continue the chemo
Ta-yea do you think this could get me cancer free again
D-I believe so and this one doesn't keep you asleep long maybe 10 hours then you'll be weak and a little groggy but you will not be sleeping days on end after it
L-that's good
Ta-when does it start
D-we have gotten the chemo for you in a box locked so we will do first round tomorrow but for now just rest take in this information maybe search it up if you want to its called "capecitabine"(I searched it up idk really if it's right don't come for me)
The doctor left and they searched it up watching videos of people having it and how it works
Ta-mum I'm scared when I get it tomorrow can you hold me and I hold onto your hand so I know I'm safe
L-yea of course I will baby
Ta-can I eat something small before tomorrow I want to remember so that it isn't as scary not eating
L-of course
T-hey kiddo how about we get some takeout my treat
Ta-yes please thanks dad your the best Tamara hugged Tim
T-of course kiddo
They ordered and ate the food before sleeping
The next morning they got Tamara comfy in her bed Lucy held her as they prepared for the new chemo they watched one more video then the doctor entered
D-okay are we ready
Tamara nodded
Ta-yea
D-okay so I'll just put this needle in your arm and put a clear plaster over it so it can't come out then there's these three plugs coming out of the tube connected to the needle I'll connect the drug through the middle plug then I'll slowly administer the chemo and in about five seconds after I give you the chemo you'll fall asleep okay
Tamara nodded holding tightly onto Lucy's hand the doctor put the needle in her arm and connected the chemo to it
D-okay are you ready
Ta-yea Tamara held Lucy's hand tightly
The doctor slowly put it in Tamara felt herself falling asleep but it wasn't nice she didn't like she moved panicked on the bed cuddling into Lucy mire as she fell asleep after her eyes closed the doctor said
D-I'll be back in ten hours to disconnect her
He left and Lucy cradled Tamara gently slipping away from under her she sat in the chair holding Tamara's hand as she covered Tamara in the blanket
L-I hope she's okay when she wakes up she seemed really scared and panicked when he first administered the chemo
T-oh come on Lucy she'll get over it
L-seriously Tim cancer isn't something you just get over they keep arguing when Angela knocks at the door
A-why are we fighting
L-Tim's saying Tamara should get over cancer because I said I hope she's okay because she seemed really scared when she was first administered the chemo it's a new chemo it makes her sleep five seconds after being administered and she stays asleep ten hours hours whilst the chemo does it's job
T-since you have nothing good to say about me I'm going to leave for a few hours
L-good come back before Tamara wakes up tho she'll know somethings up of your gone
T-okay I will bye
Tim left and Lucy just sighed putting her head in her hands
A-everything okay between you two
L-no he said if we find out tams terminal he'll leave us and move to another country and before he said he was going to drop her at foster care
A-omg that's so messed up what the hell they chat a few hours until the doctor comes in
D-okay she's ready to be disconnected from the chemo now is time to joining us
L-I think he went to the store or something I'll give him a call hold on
Ten minutes later she re entered Tamara's room
L-he went back home he'll be here in half an hour or so I'll just tell her he went shop I told him to grab her favourite drink and ice cream we can disconnect her now
D-okay she should wake up in two minutes I'll wait here until she wakes up so I can take some blood and make sure it worked a little bit at-least
L-okay thanks Tamara was disconnected a minute later she woke up tears pouring down her face
Ta-m-mum?d-dad? She cried out scared
Lucy quickly pulled Tamara into a hug rubbing her back
L-hey tam it's okay mums here okay dads just went shop quick okay
Ta-o-okay she responded sad
The doctor did the tests and left it had worked a little then Tim arrived with nothing in his hands he stumbled in a beer in his hand Angela quickly rushed him outside
A-Tim what the fuck are you doing
T-I just had a drink okay
A-well until your sober your staying away from Tamara Tim your sick now and if you affect Tamara or her health in even the slightest bit that it makes her unable to heal I will find I will hurt you and I will hurt you bad Tim go home get sober get checked out if your not sick then you can come in go home now
T-okay bye
Tim left Angela re-entered the room
Ta-where's dad
A-he had a drink and I sent him home because he's ill
Ta-okay atleast it's not mum whose ill otherwise I don't think I would be able to get chemo especially not this new one it's scary one second you're awake the next your body is trying to make you sleep but your brain tries to fight it off it feels draining but it's worth it the doctor said it was working at the end of the week Tim still had only just arrived when the doctor came in with results
D-okay so we do have some bad news the chemo worked well on the first day but it hasn't worked as well as we had hoped or thought it would it had taken away only 2% of her cancer cells
Ta-what how you said it would work
D-I know I thought it would so we will be looking for a higher dosage of this drug but if we don't find it in two weeks she will become terminal and we won't be able to help her as much as we can now
Ta-terminal?a-am I gonna die? She asked scared looking at Lucy Tim and the doctor
D-it is possible and slightly higher chance now but I don't think you will if we can get you that higher dosage drug
Ta-okay
L-and even if you were terminal we would make the most out of it okay tam
Ta-can you lie with me again mum
L-of course Lucy lay with Tamara
Tim got up and went to leave
Ta-dad where are you going?
T-to get a drink Tim left
Ta-mum is dad mad at me and you I heard him shouting at Angela yesterday and I heard him before when I woke up from chemo saying he was going to leave me at foster care if I became terminal is that true??
L-it's true he said that but I told him if he wanted to leave he could but I'm not leaving you ever tam okay
Tamara nodded falling asleep
The next day was the same she woke up this time knowing what was to come scared her she lay there in Lucy's warm embrace hoping that it wouldn't be as scary as it was the day before but as she was connected to the chemo the sand rush of panic coursed through her veins as she clung tightly to Lucy she fell asleep then ten hours later she woke up and got the results
D-I have bad news the chemo today hasn't even touched the cancer cells there still the exact same numbers we're trying to find the higher dosage drug but it's still new it only came out a few years back so we'll try our best to get it
L-okay thank you I'll keep her calm until you find something the doctor left the room.
