Whispers of an invisible girl

Chapter 1 : A lonely Summer

The salty air of summer should have been a comfort, but to Celeste, it only made her feel more isolated. As she stood on the edge of the old wooden pier, the crashing of waves against the posts below felt like distant echoes----sounds that reached her but didn't truly touch her. The sun hung lazily in the sky, casting an amber glow over the water, a scene that felt nostalgic, even though she had nothing to be nostalgic for. 

Every summer was the same. The town came alive with tourists, laughter, and friends gathering on the beach, but Celeste always found herself on the outskirts of it all. It wasn't that she wasn't invited to join, but she always felt like she was watching life happen to everyone else, like a movie she couldn't fully participate in. She could see the joy, hear the laughter, but no matter how close she got, it all remained just out of reach.

Her phone buzzed in her pocket, pulling her from her thoughts. A text from her best friend, Mia, who had been a constant presence in her life since they were children. 

''Bonfire tonight at the beach! Everyone's coming. You in?''

Celeste sighed, her fingers hovering over the screen. She knew what that night would be like-Mia would be there, surrounded by their group of friends, talking, laughing, but Celeste would once again feel like the outsider. The thought of standing by the fire, surrounded by people who knew her name but not her heart, filled her with dread. She couldn't bear the small talk, the pretending, the feeling of being so close to people yet so far away in spirit.

''Maybe,'' she typed back, her hesitation clear. She didn't want to disappoint Mia, but she wasn't sure if she had energy to pretend tonight.

As she slipped the phone back into her pocket, she wrapped her arms around herself, even though the evening warmth didn't warrant it. The sensation of being alone was heavier in the summer, when the world seemed to come alive for everyone else. For her, it was a constant reminder of the emptiness she felt. 

Waling down the pier, Celeste kicked at a small piece of driftwood, watching it skitter across the weathered boards. The last remnants of the sunset were fading, leaving behind a pinkish hue in the sky, but it did little to lift her spirits. The end of another summer day, where nothing really changed.

But somewhere along the way, that magic had disappeared. Now, the same sand felt coarse beneath her feet, and the ocean waves sounded more like a lonely song than an invitation to play. The world had kept moving, but she had somehow gotten stuck, lost in the space between who she was and who she thought she was supposed to be. 

Celeste's parents never seemed to notice the change in her. They were always so busy with work, their lives consumed by the restaurant they ran on the other side of town. They saw her at dinner, asked her about school, and offered support in the generic ways parents do. But they didn't see her sadness. No one did.

Sitting down at the edge of the pier, Celeste let her legs dangle over the side, her eyes following the rhythm of the waves. She wondered why she couldn't just feel what everyone else seemed to feel----why happiness seemed like something she had to chase, only for it to slip through her fingers. She didn't know how to explain it to anyone, not even to Mia, who was supposed to be her best friend. Maybe she didn't know how to explain it to herself.

The sound of voices in the distance caught her attention. She glanced over her shoulder and saw a group of teenagers walking around the beach, carrying blankets, coolers, and guitars. They were laughing, completely unaware of her presence. They looked like they belonged together, like they were part of something bigger. Celeste felt a sharp pang in her chest---a mixture of longing and resignation. She had never known how to be part of that kind of group, to feel like she truly fit in anywhere.

Her phone buzzed again. Another message from Mia.

''Come on, don't be weird. Just say yes. It'll be fun.''

Celeste bit her lip, her heart heavy. Mia didn't understand---she never had. To Mia, everything was easy. She floated through life effortlessly, always surrounded by people who adored her, She didn't know what it was like to feel invisible, to be present but unseen, like a ghost haunting her own life.

They sky was growing darker now, the last silver of sunlight melting into the horizon. Celeste stood up slowly, her body feeling heavier than it should. She took one last look at the ocean, then turned and began walking back towards the town, her footsteps echoing on the pier. 

''Maybe tomorrow,'' she whispered to herself, knowing deep down that she'd probably say the same thing tomorrow. And the next day. And the next.

Summer was supposed to be a time for warmth, joy, and connection. But for Celeste, it was always the season when she felt the most alone.



"I got that summertime sadness"
"Wish I was dead"
"Kiss me hard before you go"
"I just wanted you to know"
"Sometimes I get lonely"
"I miss you, I miss you"

:summertime sadness by Lana Del Ray: