God-god-god....

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Something heavy stuck my heart, a terrible blow. My eyes widened. I froze. Some kind of coldness crawled within me. My muscles could not move. My heart seemed to alternately stop beating and pump furiously. My brain went numb. I lost control over myself and the echo of that message beat against my eardrums.

I don't remember, I can't recall anything else. 'God ... God ... God ...' was all that came out of me, after which the phone fell out of my hands. I was blank. All that came to my mind was—I need to go home, to my parents.

At the mid-way stop, I got off the bus and boarded a taxi. A different sort of calm had come over me. I wasn't crying.

When, a few minutes later, I opened the door to my house, I saw my parents staring at me wondering why I was so quiet. I stood there staring back at them in response. I was still calm. Then, summoning all my courage, I told them the saddest news of my life.

As soon as mom heard, she gripped my wrist and looked at the pictures of prophets and Gods on our wall in anger. Dad buried his face in his hands. Mom cried, Dad cried and their cries echoed in that room. I was still calm. Or maybe it was a numbness. Nothing seemed to register in my mind. I looked at them for a while and then left them to go into my room. I lay on my bed, pulling the blanket completely over me. I curled up there, squeezing my hands between my thighs.

I cried.

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