WARNING FOR VOMIT AT THE END OF THIS CHAPTER! ALONG WITH SELF HARM AND HATE
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SMG4 woke up with the same tear stained face he woke up with every morning. But he felt different. He touched the top of his head and felt... ears?! 4 jumped out of his bed and ate shit because some part of him got tangled in the blanket. Still lying face first on the ground, 4 heaved himself up, slightly sniffling. His room was dark but he stumbled over to a light and switched it on. 4 turned around and saw his blanket wrapped around a blue thing that looked like a snake. Jumping back, 4 hit his head on the wall and yelped. He felt very clumsy. He knew he was usually clumsy but this was weird.
Rubbing the back of his head, 4 felt something sharp. He felt a stab of terror and crawled to his full body mirror. He slowly stood up before he reached the mirror, his blanket still following him. 4 reached the mirror and looked at himself. He looked completely different! He had small hazel brown cat ears and bighorn sheep horns, with diamond shaped carvings in them. Around his eyes there were frosty spikes, jutting out from around his eyes. He had hazel brown wings with blue tints on the edge of them and his wings were extremely fluffy. Then the blue thing he had seen wrapped in the blanket was connected to him? IT WAS CONNECTED TO HIM?! 4 slowly unwrapped the blanket from... his tail? Is that what it was?
Once the blanket was unwrapped 4 got a better look at his tail... or tails? Three long hazel tails, with a sprinkling of what looked like frost at the end, were around 4. He looked at himself and started wondering how the fuck this happened. He spun around in a circle for a second, still shocked about how this happened. Then he sat down, tucking his legs up close to him, and cried his heart out. First 3 missing, then this?!
My god 4 why are you such a crybaby? SMG4 thought to himself, still bawling his eyes out. This is why 3 left. This is why I don't deserve my friends. I'm not good enough for them. I'm not good enough for anyone! 4 gripped his hair and started to tug on it.
SMG4 rocked himself back and forth, in a small crumpled mess.
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SMG3's tails flicked back and forth as he sat in the forested area, rain dripping down the leaves and onto him. His hair was drenched and his ears were flattened to his head. He tapped his foot relatively on the wet ground and continued to wait for Hollyleaf. God what was taking her so long?
"Sorry I'm late." Hollyleaf's voice sounded behind him.
"Where the fuck were you?" 3 snapped.
"Lucy had me on a later shift, dumbass." she growled, hitting the back of his head.
3 snorted and looked away. Hollyleaf looked at him. "You know you can talk to me right?" there was a hint of worry in her voice.
"I'm fine Hollyleaf! I'm fine." he glared at her. "Anyway, what did you want me for?"
Hollyleaf stared at him with blank eyes.
3 glared at her. "You forgot didn't you?"
"Maybe.." she shrugged and let out an awkward chuckle.
"So you forced me out here in the rain to talk and you don't know what to talk about?" 3 said, his voice getting increasingly angry with each word.
"Hey 3 calm down. I'm just worried about you!" Hollyleaf said, worry increasing in her voice.
"Hollyleaf I'm fine! You don't have to worry about me! Just leave me alone if you care this much!" 3 growled, his pupils turning to splinters.
Hollyleaf knew he was gonna snap in a moment, so she turned around and left without a word. 3 watched her leave before he started to melt down. Tears streamed down his face and he sat down, wrapping himself in his wings. His hands turned into sharp claws and he plunged them into his palms, blood slowly starting to well up from the puncture wounds. He removed his claws from his palms and the blood was slowly rolling down his arms. His breath was shaky as he started to roll up his sleeves and cut his arms.
After a bit he stopped and slowly stood up. He walked away from the main clearing, still having tears falling out of his eyes. He flicked his tail and opened a portal to a floating space island, with a single willow tree on it. He sat under the willow tree and stared at his bloody arms and hands. The cuts on his arms slightly stung but he was numb to the pain at this point.
He knew Hollyleaf knew nothing about this. Whenever she thought he was going to snap, she never meant it like this. She always thought him snapping was him having a... wait, what was it called? He had different powers from the three other Death Gods, he knew that, but his powers were weird. Whenever he was too sad or angry, he would lose it, curl up and wrap himself in his wings. He also looked different too. The Death Gods all had different appearances but the others could always hide it. 3 couldn't do that. His actual appearance wasn't that much different from how he regularly looked. His eyes would turn white and other eyes would pop up on his face and wings, an endless stream of black tears coming from the extra eyes.
That's what 3 looked like right now.
He was still staring at his shaking, bloody arms and sighed. He ran his hands through his hair, staining his hair with his blood in the process. He knew he could just snap his fingers and the blood and cuts would go away. But he didn't. He didn't deserve to be happy. He deserved to be in pain. He knew that 4 was probably thinking that it was his fault that 3 left. 3 wanted so badly to leave the hell hole he lives in and go tell 4 that it wasn't his fault, that it was all 3's fault. But Lucy wouldn't let him. No matter how much she saw him suffer, she wouldn't let him leave. 3 just counted the days, waiting to go back to 4.
3 was still crying but he snapped his fingers, making the blood disappear. After a couple more minutes, he had calmed down enough that he went back to normal. 3 hated how he looked when he was like that, but would he ever tell anyone that? Nope! His problems were his and his only.
He sighed and opened a portal, stepping into it and heading home.
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4 was still very much freaking out in his room. By now he was just lying on the ground, staring at the ceiling. What was wrong with him? His hands were in his hair, gripping it tightly. His vision was blurry with tears and his nose was runny. Sniffing, he sat up. It was nighttime and everyone else had gone back to their houses. 4 thought that they were slowly giving up on him. They should give up on him. He didn't deserve them.
4 got up fully and left his room, walking towards the kitchen. He was really hungry. He hadn't left his room in about a week and when he did leave his room, only because he would die of starvation if he didn't, he would only leave at night. Walking into the kitchen, SMG4 opened the fridge and grabbed a sandwich. He ate it in a couple of bites and started heading back to his room, but not before he started to feel sick to his stomach.
Running towards the bathroom, he knelt down over the toilet and started puking. He felt like he was puking his guts out. After a while the puke started to turn into bile and 4 slowly stopped puking. Sitting back, his stomach felt emptier than ever. He didn't really feel like eating anymore. It was still dark outside and 4 headed back to his room, not bothering to clean anything up. He closed his door and locked it, changing out of his puke smelling clothes. Once he had gotten into something more comfortable, he fell back onto the ground and started crying again.
What was happening to him?
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I gave you two smg4 povs, aren't I kind? so 3 and 4 aren't having a great time. but don't worry the next episode things get better!
words: 1427
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Season 7
FanfictionSMG3 has been missing for 6 months and SMG4 has locked himself away from everyone. The two sad, traumatized gay boys are not having the best time. TW- gore, violence, cannibalism, swearing, self harm, self hate, alcoholism, smoking, abuse.
