When Love Break Ties

Chapter 37: Nathan's Final Decision

Nathan sat alone in his small apartment in Tokyo, staring out the window as the city pulsed with life below him. His mind was far from the bustling streets and bright neon lights that had once fascinated him. Instead, his thoughts were consumed by a single, agonizing question: How had everything come to this point? The question hung in the air like a thick fog, impossible to ignore. For months, Nathan had been teetering on the edge, caught between his love for Abby and the growing strain of his relationship with his family. Now, it felt like that edge was crumbling beneath him.

Abby had been his anchor when he arrived in Japan. Her energy, her intensity, her passion for life—everything about her had pulled him in, like a powerful current he couldn't resist. But as time went on, that same current started to drag him away from the shore, further from everything he had once held dear: his family, his values, his roots. Now, as he sat in the dim light of his apartment, Nathan knew that he was faced with a choice. A choice that would define not only his future, but the man he wanted to be.

Nathan's phone buzzed, breaking the silence. He picked it up, already knowing who it was before he even glanced at the screen. Abby's name flashed in the glow, but he hesitated. Their fights had been escalating for weeks now, each one a little sharper, a little more painful than the last. The latest argument, though, had been the worst. It had cut deep, exposing wounds neither of them had been willing to fully acknowledge.

He couldn't avoid her forever. With a resigned sigh, he answered. "Hey."

"Nathan, we need to talk," Abby's voice was sharp, laced with frustration, but also exhaustion. They were both tired—tired of fighting, tired of pretending everything was okay. "Can you come over?"

Nathan paused, glancing back out the window. "I don't think I can tonight, Abby."

The silence on the other end was deafening. When she finally spoke again, her voice was quieter, but no less urgent. "Nathan, we can't keep doing this. We're falling apart."

He swallowed hard. She was right. They were falling apart. But he wasn't sure if it was something they could fix anymore. "I know," he said softly, his chest tightening. "I've been thinking about that a lot."

There was another pause before Abby spoke again, this time with a hint of vulnerability that made his heart ache. "What does that mean?"

Nathan rubbed his eyes, trying to find the words he'd been avoiding for days, maybe even weeks. "Abby... I don't know if I can keep doing this."

Her breath caught on the other end, and for a moment, neither of them spoke. The weight of what he'd said hung heavy between them.

"I love you, Abby. You know that. But... I've changed so much since we got together. And I'm not sure it's all been for the better."

"So, what are you saying?" Abby's voice cracked, and Nathan could hear the hurt, the disbelief in her words.

He stood up, pacing the small room. "I'm saying that I've lost myself, Abby. My family—" he stopped, struggling to articulate the turmoil inside him. "I've pushed them away for you, and I don't know if that's what I really wanted."

"Your family never accepted us," she snapped, her frustration bubbling to the surface again. "They don't understand us, Nathan. They've never understood me."

"It's not just about that," Nathan argued, feeling a wave of guilt. "It's about who I've become. I don't talk to them anymore. I don't even recognize myself sometimes."

"And whose fault is that?" Abby shot back, her voice now filled with bitterness. "They're the ones who manipulated you, made you feel like you weren't good enough. I showed you what it was like to stand on your own two feet."

Nathan winced. "Maybe you're right, but they're still my family. And as much as I've tried to distance myself from them, I can't just erase them from my life."

Abby was silent, and Nathan could almost hear her steeling herself for what was to come. "So, what do you want? Do you want to go back to Manila and be their puppet again? Is that what you want, Nathan?"

Her words stung, but he knew she wasn't entirely wrong. His family had been controlling, and there had been times when he felt like he was drowning under their expectations. But Abby had taken that resentment and amplified it, shaping his worldview until he could barely tell where her feelings ended and his began.

"I don't want to be anyone's puppet, Abby. I just... I want balance. I need to figure out how to be a part of my family without losing myself in the process."

"And where does that leave us?" Abby's voice was small now, almost pleading. "Are you saying you're choosing them over me?"

Nathan closed his eyes, feeling the weight of the decision pressing down on him. "I'm saying I need to go home, Abby. I need to reconnect with my family and figure out who I am outside of this relationship. I don't know what that means for us."

Abby let out a shaky breath. "So, that's it? After everything we've been through, you're just going to walk away?"

"I'm not walking away," Nathan said softly. "I just... I need space to think. To figure out what I really want."

Abby was quiet for a long time, and when she finally spoke, her voice was barely above a whisper. "I thought you loved me."

"I do love you," Nathan replied, his throat tight with emotion. "But right now, I need to love myself enough to figure this out."

There was nothing left to say. Abby hung up without another word, and Nathan stood there, holding the phone in his hand, feeling the finality of their conversation settle over him like a cold, heavy blanket.

He sat back down, staring at the blank pages of his notebook on the desk. Writing used to be his escape, his sanctuary. Now, even that felt tainted by the conflict inside him. The words wouldn't come. His thoughts were too scattered, too conflicted.

Nathan knew he had made the right decision, but that didn't make it any easier. He had always believed that love could conquer anything, but now he wasn't so sure. Maybe love wasn't enough when it came at the cost of everything else that made you who you were.

He picked up his pen and scribbled a few lines, unsure if they were for his writing or just for himself:

"Sometimes love means letting go, not because you want to, but because you have to."

Nathan knew that returning home to Manila wouldn't be the solution to all his problems. His family was still complicated, still overbearing in ways that frustrated him. But they were his family, and he owed it to himself—and to them—to try and rebuild those bridges.

As he sat there, the weight of his decision settled more firmly in his chest. He didn't know what the future held for him and Abby. Maybe they could find their way back to each other, or maybe this was the beginning of the end. But for now, Nathan had to follow his own path, even if it meant leaving behind the one person who had meant the world to him.

With a deep breath, Nathan stood up and began packing. It was time to go home.