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One evening, the atmosphere in Shubman's hotel room was a mixture of quiet excitement and the soft sounds of Hyderabad's night filtering through the windows.
The team had the next day off especially after their loss against England in the first test match and Shubman and Supraja were getting ready for their long-awaited date night, something they had been looking forward to for weeks.
Shubman was in the adjoining room, fumbling with his cufflinks when his gaze drifted to a small notebook lying on the corner of the bed.
He'd never seen it before, at least not open like this, with the pages slightly crinkled, like it had been thumbed through often. Curious, he picked it up, the cover simple, unassuming, with a faint floral design on the edge.
"Yeh kya hai?" he murmured to himself, flipping it open casually. But as his eyes scanned the words, the blood drained from his face.
The pages were filled with writing in Supraja's familiar scrawl, but the content was unlike anything he expected.
"I don't know why he's still with me... I don't deserve this love. I don't deserve him. My body, the way I look... it's a fucking joke compared to the girls he could have. Why would he even want me? I mean, look at me! Sometimes I feel like I'm a charity case."
Shubman's throat tightened, his heart racing as he read further.
"I'm not beautiful. I never have been. Every time I look in the mirror, all I see are my flaws. The extra weight, the acne scars, the glasses. He deserves someone better. I wonder if he's noticed how insecure I am... fuck, I hope he hasn't. But how long can I hide it? How long before he leaves?"
He flipped to another page, his hands trembling slightly.
"I thought I'd never find love. I thought I'd end up alone, and maybe that's what I deserve. But then he came into my life, and everything changed. Still, sometimes I feel like I'm tricking him into being with me. Like he's too good for me."
A wave of emotion crashed over him as he realized just how deep Supraja's insecurities ran, how much she doubted herself, and how blind he had been to it all this time.
Just then, he heard her voice from the bathroom. "Shub? You almost ready?" she called out, her tone light, unaware of the emotional storm brewing in the next room.
