Taylor Swift One Shots <3

in summation.

A/N: hey pookies i wanted to write this bc my most recent obsession had been randomly saying 'in summation, it was not a love affair' etc. because i LIVE for that poem so i decided to write smth about taylor writing it. also so srry for my beautiful posting schedule i literally have no homework that i haven't done so i've just been lazy <3

!! UNFINISHED !! 

ALSO TW: joebless and ratty are mentioned multiple times i'm srry but it makes for angst and i actually tried writing it and it's enjoyable ig.

Taylor's POV:

I sighed. So here we were. Writing a poem, a reflection of the past events of my life. A slither of what I experienced in my love with Joe and Matty (😧🥴🤢🤮). 

Sitting at my desk, a coffee cup aligned with one of the old stained rings, a pulled up a pen. A bleak black one. One that the ink tricked out of slowly, leaving patches of white spotted throughout my writing. My sheets of paper were thick. Thick enough that one would assume an artist would use for watercolour. Running my fingers over the texture of the paper, I collected my thoughts. Sorting them into their own groups: Joe, Matty, Songwriting, Life in general. 

Lifting my pen I wrote a heading in somewhat messy, swooping curries letters. In Summation. Flicking my wrist in circles to think, what would come next? Would it be a recount, or something else? Would I be speaking? Would I be storytelling? The words stared at me, what could they mean? 

My pen pressed to the page again.

At this hearing

I stand before my fellow members of The Tortured Poets Department

With a summary of my feelings

A debrief , a detailed rewinding

For the purpose of warning

For the sake of reminding.

I would be writing as myself, The Chairman. Addressing the Tortured Poets Department, reminding, warning...

As you might all unfortunately recall

I had been struck with a case of a restricted humanity

Which explains my plea here today of temporary i n s a n i t y

The words seemed to flow effortlessly, making their way out of a nook or cranny of my mind I couldn't reach. They seemed to fit through the parts of my pen without ink, just squeezing. This would be like the epilogue to The Anthology. I reminder to always be aware of someone who you may not in fact love in the not-so-distant future.

You see, the pendulum swings

Oh the chaos it brings

Leads the caged beast to do the most curious things.

Who is this caged beast?

Do I know them?

Is it me?

My mind ridden with questions only to keep in my mind, I pondered on the thought of what could this beast be. 

Lovers spend years denying what's ill fated

Resentment rotting away

galaxies we created

I remember how I always put off the fact Joe had been somewhat distant when he loved me. Disregarding it. Throwing it to the back of my mind. When it should've been my only thought. Lover was always delusion covered in something fake. Fake love? Maybe. You can never be sure, love is a mysterious thing, catches you by surprise, off guard. 

Stars placed and glued

meticulously by hand 

next to the ceiling fan

Images of the roof Joe and I had decorated all those years ago flooded my mind. Filling every part of my head to the brim. Overflowing. Overwhelming. Nostalgic. Sad. Instinctively looking up a watched the ceiling fan above me spin, the surrounding area containing no evidence but the faint outlines of plastic stars. Recalling how we'd spent hours hand placing many, many stars to the roof. Just to have to deal with taking them down in a few short minutes. My hasty, angsty behaviour caused my nails to nick the roof, tiny dents and scratches that were glittered around the marks.  

Tried wishing on comets.

Tried dimming the shine.

Tried to orbit his planet. 

Some stars never align.

Joe had been introverted. Mysterious in fact, not telling me where he was going until I asked him to share his location. Accused me of thinking he would cheat, but reluctantly agreed.