Embracing Tomorrow

Chapter 5

CHAPTER FIVE

I woke up with a mission in mind. I'm planning to visit the site where Dominic is working, bring him some food, and have a talk with him. I want to apologize. I hope he will accept it.

Bumaba agad ako para makapagsimula na sa lulutuin. I'm planning to cook Chicken Adobo, his favorite. Wala si Manang kasi bibisitahin niya ang parents niya; she's a widowed woman with no kids, kaya parang tinuring na niya akong anak. Since wala siya, I'll be the one to cook, kahit hindi ko pa kabisado ang steps.

I opened our hanging cabinet at kinuha ang mga ingredients. First time kong magluto ng Chicken Adobo ng ako lang, kaya I need to be careful.

Habang nagluluto, I can't help but remember those times na pinagluluto ako ni Dominic. Good old days. Remembering our good old days leads to flashbacks of our past.

"Tikman mo, dali!"Masayang sabi niya. Tinikman ko ang luto niyang Chicken Adobo, and wow!

"Ang sarap, Baby!"

"Sus. Ako pa!" Magarang sabi niya. I rolled my eyes and continued eating.

I shrugged off my thoughts and continued cooking. After 30 minutes, natapos din ang Chicken Adobo. I put it in a container, and naligo at nagbihis muna ako.

I'm here on the site where Ms. Camilla Sterling's house is being built. I smiled when I saw that the house is almost done, and Dominic really followed what's on my sketch, which made me feel flattered. Shet, kinikilig ako. I shrugged off my thoughts again and got out of my car.

Hinanap ko si Dom, and after a few seconds, nakita ko agad siya, he's reviewing the blueprint of the house. Without hesitation, I walked towards him.

"Dom," I said shyly. Gulat ang nakapinta sa mukha niya, pero napalitan din ng galit. Hayst.

"Why the fuck are you here?" Mahina pero galit niyang sabi.

"I want to talk to you; I want to apologize," mahina kong sabi habang hindi tumitingin sa mga galit niyang mata.

He sighed and pumunta sa sasakyan niya. I followed him inside his car. "Faster," he said.

"I just want to say sorry, Dom. I was hurt that time, but that is no excuse. I swear my hand did that—"

"Fuck, Valentina?! Ano'ng mga kamay mo?! You're still crazy as ever," galit na sabi niya.

Huminga ako ng malalim and didn't look at him. "I know, Dom. That's no excuse, kaya nga I'm apologizing."

He sighed, trying to calm himself. You're so easy to read, my Dominic. "Did you know that was so fucking embarrassing?" Mahina niyang sabi. Yumuko ako sa kahihiyan na nangingibabaw sa akin. "You slapped the girl who was with me when I knew you had a mental illness."

"What do you mean?" Naguguluhan kong tanong.

He looked at me with pain written in his eyes. "You know I hate people with mental illness; that girl saved me from you." Ouch.

May tumulo na luha, but I quickly wiped it away. "Why, Dom? Hindi naman ako ang pumatay sa parents mo ah—"

"Hindi nga, pero kapwa mo!" I looked away, holding back my tears. I looked down at hinigpitan ang hawak ko sa container.

"P-please accept this," I said while handing him the container. "My peace offering." I smiled while not looking at him. He shook his head and got out of the car. Ouch (2). I also got out of his car na lang. He directly went to the site, while ako nandito pa rin sa parking lot, watching him walk away. Why are you always walking away from me, Dominic?

I saw a trash bin and put the food I cooked for him there. I immediately went to my car at doon ibinuhos yung mga kanina pang gustong lumabas na mga luha. It's been three years, and it still hurts.

While my tears are flooding, I can't help but remember why we broke up.

"Dom?" I slightly said while he's laying his head on my lap. Nandito kami ngayon sa condo niya, watching a movie.

"Hmm?"

I was contemplating if I should say this to him since it's a very sensitive topic to him. Huminga ako ng malalim, trying to ready myself. "Baby, I went to the hospital last week."

Bumangon agad siya and touched my face. "Bakit?! What's wrong?" He asked worriedly.

I smiled at him, "I have bipolar disorder and generalized anxiety disorder." His worried face suddenly disappeared.

He laughed. "Not a good joke, Val," he said, still laughing.

Yumuko ako. "I'm not kidding, Dominic. My mood swings, my extreme worry, my irritable mood, impulsive behaviors," I said without looking at him.

"Valentina, alam mong namatay ang parents ko dahil sa mga mental illness na yan. Don't you fucking joke with me?" I immediately felt a fire in my heart, meaning I'm getting angry.

"Dominic, I'm not the one who killed your parents," I said calmly, even as my heart pounded with anger.

"Hindi nga ikaw, pero kapwa mo naman! You know how much I hate people with mental disorders. They killed my parents; at alam mong hindi sila kinulong dahil sa mental illness na yan."

"But, Dominic, I'm different—"

"NO! Pare-parehas lang kayong lahat, mga baliw! Let's break up." That was my last straw.

I stood up angrily. "What the fuck, Dominic?! You're leaving me because of my illness? Dominic, I got these illnesses from my parents. You should be the one to be my support system!"

"No! Umalis ka na sa condo ko. Looking at your face, I remember the killers who killed my parents."

"Dom naman..." mangingiyak na sabi ko.

I can't breathe. Kinuha ko agad ang paper bag na nasa bag ko. Inhale. Exhale. Breathe in. Breathe out.

I wanted to go to my safe place. I drove to The Enchanted Cup while crying. Luckily, I'm safe.

I parked my car, and before I could go in, nakita ko si Ate Ara na may kausap na lalake. I don't know who the boy is since nakatalikod siya sa glass door. Wala namang boyfriend si Ate Ara, ah?

I went in at Lumapit Kay Ate Ara. "Ate!" Her serious face turned into a shocked and happy face.

"Val! OMG!" She stood up and hugged me. But before I could hug her back, the man looked at us, and to my surprise, it's my new psychiatrist.

Atticus?

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Contains errors ;)
sweethannie_