BURNING DESIRE

Chapter 20

"Fuck winter! He knows! Now you're going to have to explain to him!" Panic laced his words as he paced back and forth, his brow furrowed with worry. Jimmy stepped into the room after tucking Oliver into bed, his expression darkening at Taylor's outburst. "I don't know why you're panicking, Taylor! This is my fucking family I'm about to lose!" The sadness in Jimmy's eyes echoed louder than any shout could. "You left him with Oliver?" I gasped, disbelief washing over me like a wave crashing on rocks. "He was just telling Oliver about fire engines," Jimmy defended himself hastily. "How he doesn't always put out fires but gets calls for cats stuck in trees. I thought it would be okay to leave him for a moment."

"Jimmy," I said softly but firmly, "no matter what happens, you are also Oliver's dad." His gaze faltered as if my words had struck a nerve he hadn't known existed. Taylor interjected sharply before walking away,
leaving behind an echoing silence punctuated only by the distant howl of the wind outside. "Look, Jimmy," he called back from the hallway
"I know you've been there since day one—yeah? But I've come to love that little lad too. And I won't deny my feelings for Winter either!" he shouted before he slammed his door shut behind him.

Jimmy turned back towards me with confusion etched deep across his face. "So you knew he was here when you agreed to take on this role? Is that why you came?" "No!" My heart raced at his accusation; it felt so wrong being painted as untrustworthy when all I'd ever wanted was clarity and love amidst chaos. "I didn't know until the day I walked into that fire station and saw him standing there! It shocked me just as much!" "I would never lie to Jimmy!" The urgency in my voice rose alongside my frustration—a plea for understanding more than anything else. He took a deep breath and ran frustrated hands through his tousled hair—a gesture so familiar it tugged at something deep within me.

"We told Oliver his daddy was lost, Jimmy! And you know from the start I'd never lie to Oliver! We sat down together and spoke to Oliver about this, for fuck sake." " I know I know I just never thought this would happen"
Jimmy admitted quietly. "And now look where we are," Jimmy murmured softly. "What about us now that he's back?" His arms crossed tightly over his chest seemed symbolic of how closed off he felt—not just physically but emotionally too. "I want to marry you." the truth spilling out raw and honest amid our tangled emotions. "I want more kids with you, but you haven't even put a label on what we even are!"

Suddenly footsteps echoed down the stairs—Lewis appeared framed against dim light with arms crossed and an expression carved from stone—a warrior ready for battle rather than conversation. "Sorry to interrupt this lovers' tiff," Lewis said dryly while eyeing both of us pointedly—but then softened slightly when addressing me directly—"Winter? We need to talk." "I'll check on Oliver first," Jimmy mumbled quietly but resolutely before turning away toward their son's room again—with sadness woven into each step he took away from me—as if every inch distanced us further not only physically but emotionally too. "Unless..." He paused hesitantly before looking back one last time at me with vulnerability shining bright in those deep blue eyes... "You want me to stay?" "No—it's fine." A lump formed in my throat as sorrow washed over me; With one last quick peck on the lips—a promise sealed beneath tender warmth—I watched him disappear down the corridor.

"Why didn't you just tell me winter?" he demanded, halting abruptly to face her. His voice trembled slightly—not from anger but from an ache that ran deeper than any physical wound. I stood my ground, arms crossed tightly over my chest. "How? Was I meant to just walk up to you and say hi? How are you? Oh by the way, it's been nearly four years since I saw you—oh guess what—you're a daddy now?" my voice cracked at the end of my outburst. " look I Did try and find you when I found out I tried again after I Gave birth, but all I knew was your name and that you were a firefighter!"

I sighed deeply; "I understand if you want nothing to do with Oliver or if you need time," I said softly, glancing away towards the stairs that lead to where Oliver was blissfully asleep and unaware of all this chaos. "Once filming is over, we will be moving back to America—and then...then you won't have to see either of us again."

"But if you do want to be in his life if we're going to tell him who you really are...please don't break his little heart! Lewis—the boy is happy right now! He has Jimmy." At this mention of Jimmy—a steadfast figure who had filled the void during those long years—I felt a pang of guilt twist within my heart. I knew how much Oliver adored him and cherished their bond. "Jimmy loves him like a father should," I whispered. "He's my son," Lewis said firmly yet tenderly as he took another step forward until we were almost touching. "Of course, I want to know him! I want him to know I'm his real daddy—I want both of you."

Lewis finally takes a seat.
"I can't believe how much he looks like me," Lewis continued with newfound wonder lighting up his features—a mixture of awe and disbelief danced behind those intense eyes as they softened into warmth when he spoke again: "He's my mini version." A laugh escaped me then—a genuine one—as I nodded slowly, feeling some walls begin to crumble between us "Yes...he is definitely a mini-you."

"He seems like such an amazing kid," he added "When I put him to bed He was so interested in what I do." His gaze turned serious again as memories began weaving themselves into thoughts. "What did he say?" I asked cautiously yet eagerly. "I told him if mummy lets me..."—his voice dropped lower conspiratorially—"...I could take him to the fire station and let him wear my firefighter hat and press siren buttons on fire engines!"

engines!"

" you should have seen the excitement on his face. I couldn't stop smiling."
" umm, winter? Tomorrow when Oliver finishes school. Could we maybe take him to the park? Then maybe for some ice cream so I can get to know him.? And he can get to know me?"
" I don't know lewis! Mean, are you sure? You don't want some time to think about all this.!"
" no, I don't need time. I don't need to think that is my son and I want to get to know him.."

"I just want to make sure you know what you're doing and what you're getting yourself into?"
" you know I haven't forgotten that might winter? I think about it all
The time, now I have a son. Winter, I've never been more sure of anything in my life."
"Thank you, Lewis"