CHICAGO IL
10:47AMKens pov:
I grabbed my phone and keys before leaving the class and building . I was beyond tired of people at this point . I drove home and locked my door before grabbing a pre rolled blunt from my pocket .
Ken lit his blunt, letting the smoke feel his lungs and letting the tears flow freely from his eyes . He threw his head back on his smooth black king sized bed . His thoughts begin to flood with the memories of him and Aaliyah arguing .
Ken had always had a crush on Aaliyah every since they were in 8th grade . The summer before his grandma passed away which left his heart broken but unfortunately turned it dark and cold . Aaliyah and Ken got together in 9th grade . He loved her and didn't know how to show it . He couldn't commit to her which caused a lot of arguments between them and eventually the lost of their child . He was aggressive, dominant, commanding , and possessive with Aaliyah which was something she liked in the beginning but grew to hate afterwards .
" boy stop d*mm crying " ken's 17 year old brother Cameron laughed while flickering his bedroom light on and on .
" come on , I got some weed for you " Cameron said ." I'm good ." Ken said . Ken didn't smoke a lot but he only did it when he was stressed with life . He did it to escape his temper which had gotten him in a lot of trouble and bad situations in his life .
" Ken , I need you to eat something baby" kens mom said .
" I'll eat , I promise " he reasoned
Something a lot of people didn't know was that ken had a eating disorder. He didn't have a good relationship with food and a lot of people didn't know that because he never opened up to anyone about it but Aaliyah . He was only 122lbs at 16 . He would eat but wouldn't take more than 5 bites of his food which grew to stress his mother Katherine out ." stop cheating on me Ken , I told you this is the last time . I'm 2 months I don't want to lose the baby because of this Ken . " Aaliyah's loud voice could be heard echoing in kens head .
Another tear fell down kens face . The situation really hurt him . But he would only show it with his actions towards others . Rude and demanding . He couldn't show people what he was truly dealing with . How took his anger out in different forms like football and sex . It didn't help that he didn't have a good relationship with god either .
" here baby " Katherine said as she brought Ken a plate of food which displayed mac and cheese , a piece of chicken , and green beans . And a cold bottled water . Ken said a quick prayer before only taking 4 small bites of his food and throwing it into the trash
Reflections**
The day had been long and exhausting, filled with the usual pressures of school, football practice, and lingering thoughts about Aaliyah. As Ken stepped into the bathroom, he took a deep breath, ready to wash away the weight of it all. The tiled floor felt cool beneath his feet, a welcome contrast to the turmoil swirling in his mind.
He turned on the shower, letting the hot water cascade down his body, steam quickly filling the small space. As the warmth enveloped him, Ken felt the tension in his shoulders begin to melt away. He leaned against the cool tiles, allowing the water to wash over him, feeling both the heat of the water and the chill of his thoughts.
Under the flow of water, his mind drifted back to memories of Aaliyah. It had been a year since their baby had been lost, and the scars still lingered, refusing to heal. Ken had tried to move forward, to bury his feelings under layers of distraction, but moments of solitude often brought the pain rushing back.
He closed his eyes, letting the water hit his face, as if it could cleanse away the guilt and regret that clung to him like a second skin. Images of their happier times flooded his thoughts: laughing together in the park, planning their future, sharing secrets late into the night. But those moments felt like a distant dream now, overshadowed by the darkness of loss.
As the steam filled the bathroom, Ken allowed himself to think about how he had failed Aaliyah when she needed him most. Instead of being her support, he had turned away, drowning in his own fears and frustrations. "Why couldn't I be stronger?" he murmured to himself, the water mixing with the tears that had begun to flow.
After several moments lost in thought, he reached for the shampoo, lathering it into his hair. The familiar scent enveloped him, grounding him in the present. He rinsed it away, letting the water wash over him, wishing it could wash away the pain too.
Once he finished, Ken turned off the water and stepped out of the shower, the cold air hitting him sharply. He grabbed a towel, drying himself off before glancing in the mirror. The steam created a foggy reflection, but he could still see the weariness etched in his features.
He wrapped the towel around his waist and took a moment to collect himself. The reflections of his past and present clashed in his mind—he could either remain a prisoner of his guilt or take the first step toward healing.
As he got dressed for bed, Ken felt a renewed sense of purpose. He wanted to reach out to Aaliyah, to confront the pain instead of hiding from it. They had shared so much, and even if they had been apart, a part of him still cared deeply for her.
Lying in bed, he stared up at the ceiling, the silence wrapping around him like a blanket. The day's weight was still there, but it felt different now, more manageable. He closed his eyes, allowing the stillness to envelop him, ready to face whatever tomorrow might bring.
YOU ARE READING
Secrets beneath the surface
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