FINDING 12 | BOYS OF TOMMEN

apologises and acceptance

This morning, I woke up to at least 30 messages from Connor, and no fewer than 10 missed calls. I'd ignored them all, having slept through his frantic attempts to reach me. He knew he messed up. He had to.

Now, at 10 a.m., he's sitting on the edge of my bed, shoulders slumped,his jaw slightly bruised, apologizing for leaving me to walk home alone last night after Biddies. The memory still lingered,I'd felt more hurt than afraid. How could he just let me go like that?

"I'm sorry," he says, his voice low and filled with regret. His eyes meet mine, wide and earnest, as if he's searching for any sign that I'd forgive him. "I was drunk and clearly not in the mood. It won't happen again."

I sit up, hugging my knees to my chest, staring at the rumpled sheets as if they might give me answers. Could I believe him? Drunk or not, he'd made the choice to leave me. He didn't even seem to care then. It was only now, in the light of morning, that he's realizing what he did.

"Really?" I ask quietly, not looking at him, my voice barely above a whisper.

"Yeah, I promise, baby," he insists, scooting closer to me on the bed. "I've been beating myself up over it. I was a dick and I'm sorry."

His voice cracks just a little. He sounds sorry. Genuinely. But last night... the way he shrugged it off, slurring that he'd "see me later". I shake my head slightly, my mind racing. Does he even realize how that made me feel? How unsafe, how disregarded?

He reaches out, hesitating before resting a hand gently on my arm. "I should have been there for you. I know I messed up. Please... let me make it right."

I bite my lip, my heart torn between wanting to believe him and the gnawing doubt that he might do it again. "What if you just... do it again?" I ask, finally meeting his gaze. His expression softens, a flicker of guilt washing over his face.

"I won't," he says firmly, almost too quickly. "I swear. I'll never let that happen again. You mean too much to me."

I let out a slow breath, the tension in my chest easing just a little. As much as it hurt, as much as I wanted to hold onto that anger, I knew I didn't want to lose him over this. Deep down, I could see he was genuinely remorseful. It wasn't the first time he'd messed up, but he was always quick to own it, to try to fix things.

"Okay," I say softly, looking at him with tired eyes. "I believe you."

His shoulders relax as if the weight of the world has just been lifted off of them. He pulls me into a gentle hug, his arms wrapping around me. "Thank you," he whispers into my hair. "I won't let you down again.. I love you."

"Love you too."

I rest my head against his chest, still unsure but willing to give him another chance. I just hoped this time, he meant it.

———————————————-

We'd been lounging in bed all morning, the soft hum of movies playing in the background, talking about everything and nothing, just like always. The sun streamed in through the curtains, and the heat of the day started to seep in, making us restless. That's when we decided to head out with our friends, needing fresh air and a little change of scenery.

After a quick shower, I slipped into a white summer dress that floated just above my knees, paired with my favorite white trainers. Feeling refreshed and ready for the day, I stepped out of the bathroom.

"How's this?" I asked, twirling slightly as Eloise gave me an approving smile. She hopped up from the bed, her eyes lighting up.

Eloise was dressed perfectly for the hot summer day. She had on a bright pink spaghetti-strap tank top, the fabric clinging lightly to her skin, with a subtle glittery sheen catching the sunlight. Paired with it were low-rise denim capris that hugged her hips, a thin belt with a chunky buckle around her waist.She wore white platform flip-flops that gave her a little extra height, the kind that made a soft slap with every step. Around her neck hung a simple, silver heart-shaped pendant, and her wrists were stacked with colorful jelly bracelets, clinking softly as she moved.

Her hair was pulled back into a messy bun, a few strands left loose to frame her face, giving her that carefree, effortless look. She looked like she'd stepped right out of a teen magazine, with her large, oval sunglasses perched on top of her head, ready to be pulled down at any moment. It was the kind of outfit that screamed confidence and summer fun, totally in line with her bold, take-charge personality.

"Oh girl, you look gorgeous!" she gushed, practically bouncing. "Now come on, Podge told Connor they're already at the beach—Jesus, she looks lovely, doesn't she, Connor?"

Connor, sitting across the room with his face buried in his phone, barely looked up. He muttered a quick, "Yeah, she does," before his attention drifted back to whatever was on his screen.

I tried not to let the sting of disappointment show, but I felt it. I thought maybe things had changed in the past 24 hours. I thought maybe he had changed, but clearly, I was somewhat wrong.

Eloise, noticing the shift in my expression, stormed up to him with that fierce look she gets when she's about to make a point. She yanked the phone from his hands, her eyes blazing as she towered over him. "Hey!" he shouted, annoyed, reaching for it.

"Compliment your girlfriend, now," Eloise demanded, her voice sharp and unyielding, the kind of tone that leaves no room for argument.

Connor glanced up, confusion flashing across his face. "I did," he grumbled, huffing as if the world was asking too much of him.

"That was half-arsed!" Eloise shot back, crossing her arms, daring him to say otherwise.

I couldn't help but smile at her, my fierce, no-nonsense best friend. She was a queen, through and through, and at that moment, I loved her even more for standing up for me when I didn't know how to stand up for myself.

Connor walked out of the room, his mood hanging in the air like a cloud, but the second the door shut behind him, I turned to Eloise, and we locked eyes. I shrugged, the ridiculousness of the whole thing settling in, and before we knew it, we both burst into fits of laughter, the tension completely forgotten.

"Lads, right?" she managed to get out between her giggles, wiping away a tear as I made my way toward the door.

Just as I reached for the handle, I felt a sharp smack on my arse. I spun around, half-surprised, half-amused.

"Hey!" I chuckled, giving her a mock glare as she rolled her eyes with a grin, the playful sparkle in her eyes impossible to miss.

"If we weren't best friends, I'd definitely marry you," she teased, her tone half-serious, half-joking.

I laughed, shaking my head. "Honestly, same."

—————————————————

Everyone was messing about as the fire crackled in the middle of the beach, its warm glow casting flickering shadows on the sand. The sound of laughter and music blended with the soft crashing of waves in the background. I sat beside Joey, sipping on a bottle of water while he took swigs from his beer, his eyes on the fire but his mind clearly somewhere else.

I turned to him with a sly smile, my voice light but loaded with intent. "So, Joseph Lynch... why is my boyfriend sporting a bruised jaw? You wouldn't happen to know anything about that, would ye?" I asked casually, taking another sip of water as I raised an eyebrow.

He glanced over at me, trying to play it cool, he quickly shook his head. "No idea, O'Connor. Why?"

I leaned back, the smile growing as I watched him squirm slightly. "Oh, no reason," I replied, keeping my tone innocent. "Just wondering, since Aofie's car didn't roll back until what—2:30 this morning? And she was in bed way earlier than that." I watched his reaction, the corner of my mouth twitching in amusement as he shook his head again, trying hard to look innocent.

"Mm-hmm," I hummed, unconvinced, watching him with that small knowing smile that said I wasn't buying it. He could act all cool, but I knew exactly what had gone down.