The Boon of Alon

CHAPTER THIRTY TWO

The first thing Suthi says when she sits next to me in Rev's old seat in the archive is, "It went better this time."

"Thank the gods," I say. "Learn anything?"

"Maybe." She pauses. "He talks really slowly, doesn't he?"

"Yeah. I like it, though. More time to think about things."

Suthi shakes her head. Ferdah—a rider I've barely seen so far, but I guess Gred is elsewhere today—eyes us, but starts talking, so our conversation pauses there. It doesn't resume at lunch, presumably because Lemi and Jeddin are with us, but she fidgets through the whole meal. Either there's something she wants to tell me about her morning chat with Yrite, or she knows I'm going to ask.

Immediately after lunch, she grabs my arm and pulls me after her—I barely have the chance to shrug at Lemi as we leave the kitchen—and doesn't let go until we're outside and halfway around the monastery.

"I don't want to train right after lunch," I say, trailing after her as she continues towards the shed.

"No, I—I just didn't want to be overheard," she says. "The archive is too quiet."

I guess so, but you can also pretty easily hear if someone else is in there—there's often a rider or two doing their own research when I'm doing mine. Suthi stops at the shed and surveys the space around us—empty, probably because it's windy and cold little specks of maybe-snow, maybe-rain fill the air. It's not a pleasant place to chat, and it won't be pleasant training in an hour or so. It's only barely tolerable when she pulls me into the lee of the shed, where the wind is less and the snow falls atop our heads instead of into our faces.

"Yrite was, um..." She leans against the shed and frowns at the mountain above us. "You were right. Once I told him the truth, he was...nice. And...we talked a lot about...what it means to be a rider."

"That's good..." I say slowly. She's working up to something.

"I think, being a rider is a lot like being a Knight was, except helping people is the point instead of an afterthought. He helped me figure that out."

I nod encouragingly. She glances at me, grimaces, and looks back at the mountain.

"He also agreed that I should tell you stuff about me," she blurts. "My past, I mean."

"Ah." But since she still looks like she's holding her breath, I figure there's more coming. "You don't have to try to tell me everything at once, you know. You can just tell me things as you're comfortable. Like last night."

She nods, and the look she shoots me is more grateful than terrified this time. "I—yeah, I will. Thanks. But...I think it's better I at least get the hardest stuff out of the way first? I mean, you kind of, you told me the hard stuff for you too, already, right? About your boon and the—rebels attacking you and all that, right?"

"Uh. Yeah." I guess those qualify as the "hard stuff." The painful stuff. "I don't think I told you my parents sold me to my circuit manager, but uh, now you know."

She stares at me. "Gods have mercy, Della."

"Sorry. Wasn't trying to get you off track."

She shakes her head. "No, I just...you just said it. I—I think I'd rather climb that than talk about this stuff." She gestures at the sheer rock face where the training field abruptly becomes a mountain. It does not look remotely climbable.

"Why?" I ask. "I get that it's a lot harder for you than it is for me, but...I dunno. What are you scared of?"

She grimaces. "He asked me that, too."