Never enough(Frerard)

First day

Gerards pov:

High school starts today, what a good thing. That was sarcasm, just in case. That means I need to see my friends and everybody again for many hours daily, masking and pretending as always.
It's not like I don't like my friends, just... I gave up a long time ago in finding a connection with somebody that feels right, like, the typical gang they show in movies  or the friendship cool band members have. I don't know why I feel like this. I love them, but I feel like they don't know me.

-Gee! Come over, Jackass-

Ray says from the table,sitting next to Mikey, my brother. Those were my friends. Mikey was always so shy, but he started to talk more with Ray, so he's now part of the gang. Mikey is a couple of years younger than me, but he's in my same class because he was "too smart" according to teachers and his doctor. I wish I was that smart, or, at least, enjoy like he does. He likes studying and looks interested in everything , I get good grades too ,but studying is sometimes impossible and even depressing to me.

I look back at Ray with a little smile. I start walking towards them , looking at my food tray, debating  wether eating what's on it or not. It's not like I don't eat, but the idea of it looks disgusting sometimes when I'm stressed or sad, like if I was gonna throw up. Then I bump into someone and fall, his tray fell too.

-Shit, I'm sorry,I- Take mine-

I say, taking his tray that was now on the floor. I was afraid to lift my view, as always. I raised it embarrassed.

-Heh-Dude it's fine, no worries-

The guy said , with a little nervous smile, scratching the back of his neck. God , he was hot. Wait, WHAT?!? I mean, it's the only person I've ever seen who looks good in this absolutely disgusting uniform. I felt like blushing a bit, no, I got up, and gave him a little smile.

-Really, I'm sorry, I should've been more careful

I say, God, why am I acting like this?!?. He had some tattoos and both sides of his head were shaved, but a small fringe to one side. He seemed so cute smiling. PLEASE, GERARD, DON'T THINK LIKE THAT! Am I gay?! Well, of course I am, but STILL.

-It's okay, sure you're fine? You're the one who fell

He said , kindly, still looking a bit nervous.I was nervous too. I looked back to the table where Ray and Mikey were.They seemed distracted by the fact that Ray had his hand all over a cupcake , filled with frosting. They were laughing. I looked back at the guy, I needed to start a conversation with him, he seemed so cool.

-So, who are you? I-I mean, I've never seen you around-

"Did that sound rude?!? No, no, it's fine Gee, just, calm down" I tell  myself, trying to calm down.

-Oh, I'm kinda new here, I'm Frank, Frank Iero. You?

Sorry for the short chapter, I'll try to make longer ones.
Hope you enjoyed it!
-Vinny