Why am I here?? ~Dean Ambrose

~~35~~

Janessa's POV
"I'm sorry Dean..." I whispered while I grabbed my blade. Dean is out at a WWE conference.

He doesn't know I have been cutting again, he thinks I'm okay... I'm not! Due to what happened with his parents things have gotten worse... I feel as if I'm not worth his love.

I sit in on the ground in The hotel we are at whilst we are in Cincinnati, my legs are crossed and my blue hair is covering my naked back, I have just gotten out of the shower and I didn't want to put clothes on. I look down at my body, my mind is flooding with horrid things about myself and I can't help but break down in tears. What's wrong with me? Why am I so ugly? Why am I so fat? Why can't I be like all the other divas, beautiful and slim? Are some of them.

I look in front of my legs, there lies a razor, something that could take away all the pain. I pick it up and study the cool metal blade. It is old, the one I keep on my bracelets in case I need it. Dean hasn't noticed I am wearing my bracelets again, I keep them hidden in hoodies and long sleeved shirts.

I can't stop myself, I pick up the blade and put it to my wrist. I just hold it there, then... It slides. I push down hard, hard enough to break a vein. I start bleeding out, the door breaks open and Dean comes in, somehow he knew. I look at his face and whisper.

"I'm sorry! I love you!" Before I'm out like a light.

Dean's POV
I ran over to Janessa, Roman came with me, just in case I was in need of assistance with her. She was dead, lifeless!

"CALL 911 NOW!" I yell to Roman, he calls, I pick up a blanket and cover her body, I pick her up and start running to the hospital, the ambulance meets us half way and they pull her in, they put her onto the stretcher and start dressing her wounds whilst they drive.

"She's still alive, but she's dying fast! Hurry up the truck!" He told the driver.

"She's dying?" I asked with tears in my eyes. He nods his head.

We soon arrive at the hospital and they bring her in, she's still alive at the moment, but they say she won't last much longer.

"Baby, I can't loose you! Please wake up!" I said as they stopped her bleeding.

*BEEEEEEEEE-P*
I hear and I start crying! She's dead, she died!

The doctor takes the difibrillator and yells clear as he touched them to her body, they repeat this process two more times and still no life!

I cry and walk over to her.

"I love you Janessa! I can't live without you! Please come back to me baby!" I say, nothing happens I lean in, and I bring my lips to hers.

Seconds later I hear, *BEEP, BEEP, BEEP* a healthy heart beat, and she is kissing me back.