ALMOST THERE

CHAPTER 30: Who is this guy...

Love & War - Yellow Claw
📖🎧🌧️🌔☄️

I sat cross-legged on my bed, a book open in front of me, but none of the words made sense. My eyes skimmed over the lines, but my brain? It was somewhere else. Lost in thoughts I had no business thinking about.

Shahaan's birthday was in a few days. Yay.

No, scratch that. Not "yay." More like a giant, earth-shattering "GOD! I MISS HIM."

The fact hit me like a gut punch, and I hated it. I hated how he still mattered so much to me, how he'd crawl his way into my mind no matter how much I tried to shove him out.

We hadn't really talked lately, and I knew why. Shifa was always with him. That girl had somehow managed to wiggle herself into every conversation, every hangout.

She was like a human barrier, always around him now, with her annoying laugh and weirdly intense "Shahaan is my best friend" energy.

"Classic Saysha," I muttered under my breath. "Can't even focus on a book without thinking about someone who doesn't even care anymore...or maybe he does...fuck I don't know!"

And Maa? Well, let's just say she had her own way of throwing a wrench into things, too. Both of them—unintentionally or not—had driven this invisible wedge between Shahaan and me. Not that he'd notice. He was too busy being everyone's "best friend."

I threw the book aside with a huff, letting it flop onto the bed like it was the book's fault I felt like this. Maybe it was. I could've used some distraction.

If I can't talk to him, I'll at least send him a gift. Something simple, nothing too... emotional. A safe, no-feelings-attached way to say, "Hey, I still exist. Happy Birthday." Even though everything about him was emotional for me now. 

Great.

Dragging myself off the bed, I started preparing the gift—a stupid task for someone who couldn't even sort out her own mess of feelings. My heart felt like it was carrying a boulder, weighted down by everything unsaid between me and him.

Between me and Maa. 

I didn't even know where to begin with that one. Sure, I had my share of screw-ups, but sometimes I wished someone would get it—get me and maybe even get her.

Sometimes I found myself wishing for something I never had. Like a sibling. Someone to understand how hard it was to juggle this tightrope between family.

Lost in that thought, a sound from outside caught my attention. A truck, some voices. I frowned, looking out the window, and saw...people. New neighbors, I guess. A bunch of guys unloading stuff, boxes, furniture.

Great. More strangers to pretend to be friendly with.

But what really made me do a double take was Raahat. 

Yep. 

Him.

The guy with the emotional range of a brick wall. Standing there, helping them out. His face, cold as usual, stoic like a statue, barely blinking as he grabbed boxes and helped unload things. His actions—surprisingly kind, I guess—were a weird contrast to that icy demeanor of his.

Like, dude, what are you, a robot?

I watched for a minute, completely annoyed by the fact that I couldn't tell if he was doing this out of actual kindness or just because he could. That kind of irritated me. And, okay, maybe I was a little shocked. Or curious.