Playing for Keeps

BallPark

Jack POV:

"I have late shift tomorrow, so I won't be on. Don't miss me too much" I joke to Lily while I am putting the groceries I ordered online away.

"Sorry, won't have much time to do that, my friend Tanya is dragging me to a baseball game, don't ask me who is playing because I know nothing about baseball" she says as I hear her ruffling through a drawer. "But Tanya is on a mission and there is no stopping her when she has made up her mind."

"On a mission, sounds serious. What mission is she on?" I ask as I feel my heartrate picking up. Her being at tomorrow's game is making me sweat. I know she doesn't know who I am outside, in the world that has put us both in terrible situations, but I will know she is watching me play or at least in the same building as me and that alone makes my heart race.

"On a mission to find me more dates, she thinks I need to go out more. And I do, it's just that.." she hesitates. "Yeah?" I ask hoping she is feeling the same as I am and she is braver than I am and actually vocalizes it. I knew that I was falling for Lily and that I could no longer deny it a few weeks ago when she went out on that date. When she texted she was on a date I saw red and felt irrationally angry. The rest of the night I found myself pacing until it hit me, I was jealous. It wasn't until she texted that she was home that I calmed down. A week after I nonchalantly asked when their second date would be and she said it just didn't work out, which made me feel happy. 

"I am ready, I really am but I don't want to meet someone that way, I know I don't put myself out there enough to find someone naturally. I don't know whatever. I am going and hopefully at least get one date out of the whole thing." she laughs at the thought of it. I, do not.

"Hey, well my friend has two tickets he isn't going to use and it is close enough to the field that you can smell the players" I say because I have two tickets I usually sell online because I have no one to give them to. This is my opportunity to finally see her, in person, the girl I have been crushing on even though I am afraid to verbalize it.

"Ah, it's fine Tanya got tickets already from her brother."

"Ask her, tell her it's third row by the home base, she won't say no to that." I insist, because I am not going to miss this opportunity. Will I probably play like shit? yes. But I will play like shit regardless knowing she might be seeing me, even though she won't know it's me. "Just ask, I rather you have a good first experience, and hell you might find your guy in the nice seats" I say trifling because hell I hope she doesn't find a guy in those seats.

"Yeah, let me text her and I will get back to you" she finally responds.

About an hour later she texts that Tanya does in fact prefer the front row seats to the nose bleeds. I tell her I will send her the tickets via email and smile at the fact that I will finally put a face to the girl I have been talking to for the last couple of months.

We come out to start warming up and I can't shake out the nerves I feel. I had a mild panic attack yesterday thinking about it. What if she isn't what I imagine, not that I have a specific preference but I have been crushing on this girl and last night after the panic attack ceased I decided I would muster the balls to let her know.

"Dude, why are you so jittery? You haven't been like this in a while" Scott asks me as we step out to the batting cages. I have shared that I met someone with Scott but I have not told him how, where or that I have no idea what she looks like.

"Lily is coming to the game today." I say "I feel fucking out of it. I can't stop thinking about fucking up or getting hit in the balls and her seeing that."

"Well that is extreme, but damn you really like this girl. I thought you said it was casual?"

"I don't want it to be. Hell I'm all in man, and shit its nerve wracking." I pass the saliva that has accumulated on the back of my throat.

"Man chill, I am sure it will all go well and you will be able to profess your love after the game. Now please snap out of it"

We go get ready and an hour later we come out to the dugout. I stand on the side looking out to the crowd trying to not make it seem like I am looking for someone. I spot the seats and see they are empty. I get off the side and go start prepping, when Scott yells "She here bro?" from the other side, and everyone turns to look at me. What the fuck man. I shake my head and pretend to tie my shoe when Boe asks "A girl coming to see you? WOOO, we thought you were still in the slumps man." They all surround me while I shoot Scott a sharp look and he looks over with sorry in his eyes. Too damn late man. I can feel myself getting red because I know what is coming up.

"So tell us about her man" Tyler ask first, followed by a unison Yeah.

I sigh and look up, because I have to give them something or else they won't let this go. Reminder to scold Scott about this. "It's new, nothing to tell. If this turns into something, which I hope it does, all of you will be the first to know" I smile and get up to get water because I need to get out of that huddle.

"Well, it looks like we have a girl to impress you hear!" Scott yells and claps his hands to motion that the questioning is over.

I hop on the side again and look at the seats, and they are no longer empty. There's two girls occupying them, both beautiful but the the one on the left is just gorgeous. She has chest length curly light brown hair, heart shaped face with large hazel eyes and a button nose. She is smiling, a kind harmonious smile that feels like it's illuminating the ballpark. I pass saliva as I feel my heart thudding in my chest, not allowing me to hear the chatter around me. Shit I need to know which one is Lily and fast, what if she is the girl next to her with long black slick hair and a mischievous smile and I am here staring at her friend.

"Ty pass me my cell yeah?" I tell Tyler motioning to it. "She here man?" he asks as he passes me the phone.

"I think so, give me a minute" I reply as I unlock my phone. I will send her a check up message and whichever girl picks up her phone, I will know it's Lily.

U there already?

I hit send and turn to look at them, waiting to see which one takes out her phone. I can feel my heart trying to come out of my chest, and if there was any doubt in my mind I have fallen hard for this girl it dissipates. After what felt like hours but was only a few seconds, the girl on the left rummages through her purse and takes out her phone. I see her read the message and her eyes twinkle as her smile grows bigger, brighter. I feel the blood in my body fall to my feet with confirmation that the gorgeous girl is Lily.

She elbows her friend who reads the message , looks at her and gives her a little shove. I can feel my smile growing because hell that makes it seem like what I am feeling is reciprocal. She begins to type out a response, but her smile is blinding. A few seconds later my phone dings and I look down at it.

yes, thank you for the seats they are great. 

Now stop bothering me, Tanya is on the hunt and I have to approve before I end with an octogenarian

and with that, she brings me back to the realization that if I don't do something quick, she can slip through my fingers.