Crossing States

Chapter 14

The days that followed Ethan's confession felt like a blur to Luca. He had spent every moment avoiding their dorm room, choosing to study in the library, hang out with acquaintances, and even take long walks around campus to escape the weight of the storm inside him. The memory of their argument, followed by Ethan's heartfelt admission, played on repeat in his mind, making it nearly impossible to focus on anything else.

Luca's thoughts were a tangled mess of confusion and guilt. He replayed every moment they had shared, the laughter, the late-night talks, and even the awkward silences. Each recollection felt like a revelation, and he found himself drifting back to the warmth of their childhood friendship. How had he not seen the signs before? The way his heart raced when Ethan laughed, the comfort he felt being near him, and the way their conversations seemed to flow effortlessly, all of it had been right in front of him, yet he had pushed it away, too afraid to confront the truth.

Sitting in the library one afternoon, surrounded by the musty scent of old books and the quiet murmur of students, Luca's mind wandered back to the countless hours he and Ethan had spent together as kids. Climbing trees, building forts, and sharing secrets—he remembered the unbreakable bond they had forged. It felt as if the past and present were colliding, and he was caught in the middle, teetering on the edge of realization.

"Why am I avoiding him?" Luca muttered under his breath, the question echoing in his mind. He knew why, of course. The fear of what admitting his feelings could mean for their friendship loomed over him like a dark cloud. What if he didn't feel the same way? What if things became awkward between them? The thought made his stomach twist in knots.

But deep down, there was a nagging sense that he had been denying his own attraction to Ethan. He had dismissed it as nostalgia or an innocent friendship, but now that Ethan had laid his feelings bare, Luca couldn't ignore it any longer. Each moment they had spent together felt charged with something more—something beautiful, yet terrifying.

After a particularly grueling day filled with classes and study sessions, Luca found himself standing in front of the dorm room door. He had promised himself he would talk to Ethan, but the fear held him back, paralyzing him. He took a deep breath, recalling how vulnerable Ethan had been in that moment, how he had risked everything to confess his feelings. It was time for Luca to confront his own emotions.

As he finally pushed the door open, the familiar scent of their shared space enveloped him. Ethan was sitting on his bed, staring at his phone, seemingly lost in thought. The moment their eyes met, the air crackled with tension. There was a moment of hesitation, both of them waiting for the other to speak, but it was Luca who broke the silence.

"Ethan," he said, his voice steadier than he felt. "Can we talk?"

Ethan looked up, his expression a mixture of hope and anxiety. "Yeah, of course. I... I'm glad you're here." He put his phone aside, sitting up straighter, as if bracing for whatever was about to unfold.

Luca took a deep breath, his heart racing. "I've been avoiding you, and I'm sorry for that. I needed time to think." He paused, searching for the right words. "When you confessed your feelings, it shocked me. I didn't know how to react."

Ethan nodded, his gaze unwavering. "I understand. I didn't want to put that pressure on you. I just... couldn't keep it to myself anymore."

Luca felt a surge of gratitude for Ethan's honesty, but the weight of his own feelings pressed down on him. "I've realized something over these last few days. I've been in denial about how I feel about you. The truth is, I've liked you for a long time now." The words tumbled out, each one feeling like a release. "I was just scared to admit it."

Ethan's eyes widened, a mix of surprise and relief flooding his expression. "Really?" he asked, almost breathless. "You feel the same way?"

Luca nodded, his heart pounding. "I do. I've been trying to rationalize it, to convince myself that it was just friendship, but I can't ignore it anymore. There's something special between us, and I want to explore that."

A smile broke across Ethan's face, lighting up the room in a way that made Luca's heart swell. "You have no idea how happy that makes me."

"But I'm still scared," Luca admitted, his voice softer now. "I don't want to ruin what we have. Our friendship means everything to me."

"It means everything to me too," Ethan replied, sincerity lacing his words. "But I believe we can navigate this together. We don't have to rush anything. We can take our time and figure it out."

Luca felt a weight lift off his shoulders. The fear that had been choking him began to dissipate, replaced by a sense of clarity and excitement. "I'd like that. I want to see where this goes."

As the rain continued to pour outside, they shared a tentative smile, the warmth of their connection rekindling in the midst of the storm. Luca felt a sense of awakening, as if the clouds that had shadowed his heart were finally parting. He was ready to embrace his feelings for Ethan and see where this new chapter would take them.

"Let's start fresh," Ethan said, his voice filled with hope. "As friends who like each other."

"Yeah, I like the sound of that," Luca replied, a smile breaking across his face.

As they settled back into their routine, the atmosphere in the room shifted, lighter and filled with the promise of new beginnings. Luca felt alive in a way he hadn't before, and he knew that this was just the beginning of a journey he had long been yearning for.

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