TS Albums One-Shots

Moments Like These

"You know, I think this is my favourite seat in the house," Lover mused.

I pulled her closer into me, rearranging the blanket on our laps and the pillow behind her head.

"Why's that, love?" I gently caressed her thigh with my hand, the one wrapped around her.

"The view at sunset. It's gorgeous."

I looked up. She was quite right, the setting sun cast golden rays on the city at this time of day, it was always shockingly beautiful.

"I always wonder how humans can look at this... see an earth like this, and think, who cares about that?" Lover sighed and rested her head on my shoulder. "I'll never understand it."

"I guess they just take it for granted," I replied, resting my head on hers, feeling her scalp through her thinning hair.

"People take a lot of things for granted, don't they?" My wife continued, her gaze pointed straight at the gorgeous setting sun.

"They certainly do," I agreed. The conversation was feeling rather one sided at the moment, but I couldn't care less.

"Money, safety, comfort, health," she picked up my hand and our fingers intertwined. "Hair."

I hummed and nodded.

"Maybe I should steal some of yours," she giggled and tugged at my messy curls, pulling them over her head.

I laughed quietly. "You can have it, my love. If you needed all of it, you could have it."

"Maybe if I wasn't in so deep."

We fell into silence. The only sound filling the air being a soft cricket's chirp from somewhere in the bushes that lined the driveway.

"I wish I didn't take my health for granted as much as I did," the girl beside me sighed after a moment.

I looked down at my hands, playing with my fingers to hold back threatening tears. "That's not your fault, love. Not many are grateful for their health."

"Mm. They should be. You never know when life is going to swoop in and... take everything away."

I squeezed her hand. "You really don't."

"Perhaps that's life's way of reminding people to stay grateful. Perhaps I'm one of those chosen reality checks."

A silent, disobedient tear slipped down my cheek that I quickly brushed away. "That's not it. You're worth more than that."

"I don't know, Rep. It would make sense."

"No it wouldn't, because life would be wise enough to know not to pick someone like you."

Lover thought for a moment. "Maybe it was a lucky dip?"

I let out a slow, shuddering, sigh and gave her a small smile. "Maybe, love. Maybe."

"Are you okay, Rep? You seem really low," her tone was full of genuine concern.

"Lover..." I exhaled shakily. 

Lover sighed. "I'm trying to make these moments count, babe. Just because I have c-"

"Don't say it."

My wife fell silent, her hand gently squeezing mine. I forced myself to take deep, controlled breaths. She was right, of course. I couldn't just ruin these perfect, golden-lit moments with pure sadness.

"We're gonna be alright for now. Aren't we?" Lover smiled softly up at me.

I nodded shakily. She was right. We were going to be fine. Not even life could come between what we had.

"Yeah, we're fine. You're going to be fine for now."

Lover sighed before nodding slightly and yawning, laying her head back onto me. She got tired so quickly these days. I hated it.

About 3 quarters of the sun had disappeared below the horizon now, leaving the last few dregs of sunlight to have their time to shine. Normally, I wouldn't put my time into watching these daily phenomena, but they reminded me of her. And while I could have both, I would use this as much as I could.

An amber monarch butterfly flapped its dainty wings in front of us, putting on a perfect little display.

"I love butterflies," Lover sighed.

"I know," I murmured.

"Do you know why?"

"Cause they're pretty?"

"I'm not that shallow."

"Right, sorry baby."

Lover snuggled into me further. "It's because of what they symbolise. Hope, new beginnings."

"What's cool about that?" I asked curiously.

"They're such delicate little creatures but they hold such a big purpose. They symbolise such a beautiful thing."

"I guess they do," I murmured. My eyes followed the sun as the last of it slipped away. "You'd make a very pretty butterfly, love."

Lover giggled, "You think so?"

"You'd make a pretty anything," I confirm.

"Maybe not in this state," she shivered and pulled the blanket further onto her lap.

"You wanna go back inside?" I rubbed her goosebump dotted arm.

Lover shook her head. "I'm okay."

I hummed quietly in response and cuddled her closer.

The emotional unrest in my mind was at an all time high. It had been all day. I wanted to scream and beg for mercy for my girl, I wanted to punch and kick and shout at every appointment. I wanted to sob until I'd run out of tears to weep, but I wouldn't. No, there was too little time for that.

So I didn't. Until winter, I had. Winter was when I could let it go. But I didn't want to. Letting go would mean losing her too. But it didn't matter. I'd lose her either way.

I closed my eyes and counted out a soft, slow exhale. Every moment with Lover felt like nothing else. It was everything to me. She was everything to me.

After her, who did I have? No one knew me quite like Lover did, no one trusted me like Lover did, and I didn't trust them either.

Soft breaths matched mine, and I realised Lover had fallen asleep. As unfortunate as it was, this was a regular occurrence these days. Always at odd times, but as long as I could see her chest rising and falling, I didn't mind.

I knew we didn't have long left. But moments like these reminded me how incredible our limited years together had been. Her limp body in my arms and soft breaths were all I needed in moments like these, and the ring on my finger would always be a reminder that this beautiful, sweet girl had once been, and would always be, mine.

~~

Well SOMEONES liking her angst at the moment.

Can you tell?