My Safe Haven

Chapter : 17: A Promise of Forever

Warning:- This chapter contains: emotional distress/trauma, past abuse/assault, PTSD/anxiety, intimate relationships, emotional vulnerability, nightmares/flashbacks, emotional distress/crying, emotional vulnerability, brief anxiety, vulnerable conversations. Reader discretion is advised.⚠

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Thoughts are in italic...

Aviraj's POV

After tucking Saras into his bed, Aviraj hesitated to join him, he felt unsure, prompting Saras to look up with teary eyes. "You don't want to touch me anymore," Saras said, his words more statement than question, filled with conviction. Aviraj's panic intensified. No, Saras shouldn't think that. He couldn't let Saras think that.

He quickly slid into bed, reassuring Saras, "No, love, that's not why I hesitated. I just wanted to give you space." Gently caressing Saras's hair, Aviraj silently pleaded for him to believe. Saras's silence reignited Aviraj's panic, but then Saras locked eyes with him and whispered, "What if I want you? Here, with me, always?"

Aviraj's heart skipped a beat; that was all he'd ever desired.

Composing himself, he replied, "You wanting me is all I've ever wanted. I'll stay with you, as long as you want." He promised. "Preferably forever." Saras's soft chuckle was all the affirmation Aviraj needed. "Then stay, please, forever," Saras whispered, and it melted Aviraj's heart. Aviraj pulled him into a gentle cuddle, "Of course," he whispered back.

As they drifted off to sleep, Aviraj knew they needed rest. Samridhi and Aarsh would join them for dinner, and he didn't want those sharp kids to sense their agitation.

Holding Saras securely, Aviraj drifted off.

Time skip...

Aviraj woke to painful whimpers. His hands were empty; Saras was supposed to be beside him. Alarmed, his eyes snapped open. He frantically scanned for threats but found only Saras, writhing in pain, small pleas escaping his lips.

Realization dawned: Saras was having a nightmare.

Aviraj cautiously backed away a bit, slowing his breathing to calm himself. Him panicking wouldn't help Saras. After he gathered himself, he approached Saras calmly, gently shaking him by the shoulders. "Let go... Don't want to... Let go," Saras muttered, and grabbed his wrist in his daze, his grip on Aviraj's wrist tightening almost painfully.  Saras's heavy breathing revealed his fear, but he lay still, his voice laced with restraint. "Tamas, let go... Not your property," he whispered urgently, fear seeping into his words. Aviraj's eyes watered, but inside, he seethed with rage. If he ever found Tamas, he'd break him limb by limb.

He shook Saras harder, and Saras's eyes snapped open, revealing bone-chilling terror. Those petrified eyes locked onto Aviraj, unwavering. Saras was wide awake, but the air around him was thick with caution.

His grip on Aviraj's wrist tightened, likely to bruise, but Aviraj didn't dare move.

"This is real," Saras whispered.

"It is," He reassured, repeating it to calm Saras's fears.

"You're real," Saras said again.

"I'm real," Aviraj affirmed.

"I'm back..." Saras added, hesitation creeping into his tone.

Aviraj cradled Saras's hand, still clutching his wrist, with gentle care. "You're real, this is real, I'm real. You're back, safe and sound, away from that nightmare." Saras's tears finally broke through, rolling down his cheeks. Aviraj pulled him into a wordless embrace. Saras buried his face in Aviraj's neck, silent tears soaking his skin. His hold tightened, his face buried in Saras's neck, inhaling his calming scent. He was scared himself. He harbored a secret fear: failing to rescue Saras from his nightmares without causing harm. Worse, he feared failing to be Saras's safe haven.