Sempiterno VI (AlanxJeff)

Innocent

Alan

I hated seeing Jeff cry. I hated it more than anything else in this damn world. Seeing his big brown eyes filled with confusion, that expression that said something was terribly wrong, broke me. I knew he was confused, that the lies they had fed him kept him trapped in a web of fear and distrust.

I wanted to get closer to him, but every step I took felt like a chasm between us. When he asked me about our relationship, it hit me hard—because we had never needed words to define what we were. Our love was so natural, so deep, that labels never felt necessary. But now... damn it, I wished we had. If only we had agreed that we were boyfriends, or better yet, engaged, maybe that would've given him something to anchor his memories. Something to hold onto in the midst of all that confusion.

When I told him that if he tried to run again, I would kiss him, it wasn't an empty threat. I craved his lips like a man in the desert craves water. It had been two years since the last time I kissed him, since the last time I held him in my arms, and it was killing me. But at the same time, I knew I couldn't force him. I couldn't make him feel what used to bind us.

That incident in the hallways had affected him much more than I had imagined. He must have felt lost, abandoned. And I, for my part, felt guilty for not noticing sooner, for thinking that giving him space was the best thing after what happened at breakfast.

When I approached Jeff's room around midday and didn't find him, my heart stopped for a moment. The emptiness in the air where his scent should have been sent me into a panic. My mind filled with terrible possibilities: Had he tried to escape again? The very idea gripped my chest like a cold hand squeezing my heart. I couldn't bear losing him again.

I ran without thinking, looking for Charlie. If anyone knew where Jeff was, it had to be him. But when I found him, the worry on his face was enough to tell me that he was just as lost as I was. "He's not with you?" he asked, and those words echoed in my head like a sentence. No, he wasn't with me. Where the hell was he?

Charlie and I searched the mansion like desperate souls. Every corner, every hallway, every room... the emptiness was oppressive, as if the very house was mocking our search. And then, as we walked toward the general living room, I heard Way's voice. "I can't believe it... he doesn't even have a sense of direction," he muttered irritably, his eyes fixed on his computer screen. There was something in his tone, in his casual indifference, that made fury start swirling inside me.

I approached him, feeling my control slowly slip away. "How long have you known where Jeff is?" I asked, but the question didn't come out as a simple reproach; it was an accusation full of contained rage.

Way didn't even look up. "Since he disappeared," he muttered indifferently, as if it were a detail of no importance. That calm, that coldness, made something inside me snap.

"What the hell did you do?!" I spat, fury overflowing in every word. I rarely allowed myself to lose control like this, but this was different. This was Jeff. And Way... what the hell was he thinking?

Finally, Way lifted his cold gaze and stared at me with that distance that always drove me crazy. "He didn't refuse when I told him I'd help him escape," he replied, his tone so detached that it hurt.

"He's confused," I responded, softening my tone slightly. "Too confused by everything that's happened. He doesn't remember anything. We need to give him time. Little by little, I'll convince him..."

"Convince him of what?" Way interrupted. "Why do you have to convince him to stay? You shouldn't need to convince your fated person to stay!"

Way stared at me, but this time his gaze was harder, more direct. "Alan, that's not love. That's not how it works. No one has to convince anyone. If he's yours, he'll know it, even if he can't remember the past. And if he chooses to leave, then... maybe it was never love in the first place."