Gifts and roses..-*

Chapter 23 -

Giyuu hadn't managed to get a single word out. His mind had frozen, and by the time he finally snapped back to reality, Sanemi was gone, leaving him standing there with the limp bouquet clutched in his hands. He stared down at the flowers, his eyebrows nearly reaching his hairline as he tried to process what had just unfolded.

Sanemi... apologized? Sanemi? Of all people?

He blinked once, then twice, as if to check whether he was awake.

Sanemi's words replayed in his mind, but they felt distant, distorted. He tried to piece it together, but it was almost too absurd to process. Sanemi Shinazugawa, the man who had never admitted a fault in his life, the one who treated him like he was the dirt on the bottom of his foot... had shown up at his door, vulnerable and exposed, just to apologize? And on top of that- give flowers?

Even though Sanemi was gone- he could still feel his pulse racing, his fingers numb as they gripped the stems. It was like the air had been sucked out of his lungs, leaving him light-headed. His legs felt rooted to the ground as if the shock had drained him of any strength. He wasn't just shocked- he was absolutely flabbergasted.

'This is unheard of,' he thought, the idea rattling in his skull. 'Sanemi doesn't apologize. He doesn't... care.' But the more he stood there, glancing down at the wilted mess in his hands, the truth of it began to settle in.

He stared at the bouquet, trying to focus his eyes on it, but everything still felt like a blur, adrenaline doing him no favours right now. Some of the flowers were barely hanging on, a chaotic mess of ragged petals and crooked stems, as if they had barely survived whatever journey Sanemi had taken to collect them. Yet, in the middle of it all, one vivid blue flower caught his eye, standing out like a beacon amid the disorder. He raised his hand and gently brushed a finger against the bright blue petals, appreciating how velvety it felt against his skin.

'He picked flowers for me...' Giyuu's thoughts were tumbling over each other in disbelief. He hadn't just apologized; he had gone through the trouble of finding flowers for him. Sanemi cared enough to do this? His head spun, the edges of his vision swimming. 

'Maybe I'm just overtired.' He thought numbly 'This has to be a trick from the lack of sleep.'

But then again, he could still feel the brush of the petals against his fingers. It was all real.

Sanemi had stood there, disheveled and sweating, with his usual scowl twisted into something else- something raw. There had been bruises, dirt streaked across his arms, and- were those bee stings? Bee stings, for crying out loud?  It was as if he'd fought the earth itself just to bring these flowers.

He'd gone through all that to apologize? Giyuu blinked again, feeling his heart lurch uncomfortably. He could still picture Sanemi's face in his mind- furrowed brow, awkward, his voice struggling to find the right words.

It didn't add up. He had never seen Sanemi so genuine. He had seen him angry, seen him smug, even seen him bloodied and half-dead, but sincere? Vulnerable? 'That's not him... right?' He couldn't fully grasp it. The apology, the discomfort, the sincerity- it didn't align with the Sanemi he had known. And yet, he couldn't shake the weight of those words. They clung to him, lingering.

Sanemi had meant it this time. It made all the difference. Giyuu's throat tightened, emotions he wasn't prepared to deal with swirling uncomfortably in his chest. Could it be that Sanemi actually cared afterall? Was there genuine remorse behind his words? The notion felt so alien that Giyuu almost rejected it outright, but it lingered, tightening around his thoughts like a vice.

He had never expected this, yet here he was, clutching a bouquet, a damn bouquet, from the same person who had once looked at him with such disdin in his eyes. Each thought tumbling into the next like an unstoppable tide. Was he supposed to feel relieved? Angry? Grateful? The apology had cracked something inside him, something he thought was long dead- a spark of hope, maybe. But it was fragile, like the petals in his hands, and he wasn't sure what to do with it.

Why now? Why handn't he given up? The strangeness buzzed in his head. His body ached- not from anger, but from the sheer force of disbelief. He didn't even know how long he'd been standing there, staring blankly at the flowers as his mind ran in circles.

His jaw clenched, tension rippling through his neck and shoulders. The entire situation felt like a cruel trick, he could feel the strangeness of it all tightening around him like a noose, suffocating, pulling him under.

'Maybe... maybe he's trying.' The thought crept in, hesitant and quiet. Maybe Sanemi was trying to change, to make things right. But could Giyuu accept it? Could he even start to consider forgiveness? After everything? He shook his head slightly, trying to dispel the weight of his own thoughts.

His fingers tightened around the flowers. They were real. Sanemi's words had been real. The apology had happened.

But what was he supposed to do with all of that?

Did he leave so quickly because he was embarrassed? The whole encounter had been so awkward, so painfully stilted, it didn't seem implausible. Sanemi had practically shoved the flowers at him and bolted before Giyuu could even react. That flustered look on his face- the tension in his voice as he stumbled over his words... it was almost laughable, but also bizarrely out of character.

Sanemi, embarrassed? Giyuu stared down at the flowers again, feeling a faint tug of something akin to amusement, though it was quickly swallowed by the lingering shock. It was so unreal- the same person who bulldozed his way through every confrontation without a second thought, actually awkwardly fumbling through an apology and then getting embarrassed about it?

Sanemi had been so uncomfortable, like he was balancing on a tightrope, trying not to fall into the vulnerability he clearly despised. Giyuu had never seen him like that before, but now, as he pieced it together, it almost made sense. The quick exit, the rough shove of the bouquet- it had all screamed of someone desperate to escape before they showed too much.

Apologising and being embarrassed, Giyuu thought, shaking his head slightly, a small, incredulous smile tugging at his lips. It was as if everything Giyuu had known about Sanemi had been flipped upside down in a matter of minutes.

Giyuu steadied himself with a deep breath before turning to reenter the building, his fingers still clutching the uneven bouquet. He looked down at the flowers, unsure of what to do with them.

It wasn't hard to tell that foraging wasn't Sanemi's forte, by the sheer state of some of these flowers. But despite this, you couldn't deny the effort behind the bouquet. It was clear that Sanemi had had trouble figuring where to find them. The flowers might have been far from perfect, but they still spoke volumes concerning how much he was trying.

And yet, doubt lingered. Giyuu couldn't afford to be too trusting, not again. Sanemi had already hurt him once- it wouldn't be unheard of for it to happen again. His instincts told him to stay guarded, to protect himself from being hurt all over again. There was still a wound that hadn't healed, a part of him that recoiled at the idea of letting Sanemi in. He had been hurt so deeply, he never wanted to feel that ever again.

But something about the way Sanemi had stood there, the words he had forced out... they didn't feel like lies. There was sincerity in his voice, a vulnerability Giyuu hadn't expected. The flowers- despite their wild, mismatched state- was a gesture that Sanemi had never made before.

For now, Giyuu decided to hold onto his scepticism as he placed the flowers in a spare vase. Why was he even keeping them? He could hear the nagging voice in the back of his mind urging him to toss them aside, to not let himself be swayed so easily. After everything that had happened, it felt almost wrong to hold on to the bouquet.

And yet, there was something stopping him from discarding it, something about the way Sanemi had shown up at his door, awkward and raw. It wasn't forgiveness- far from it- but it was something.

Kinda short? 😭😭😭😭