Evan Buckley

Chapter 11: I'll always stay

Chapter 11: I'll always stay

It had been a week since Shannon had passed, and Buck could see the toll it was taking on Eddie. He was doing his best to mask his pain, putting on a brave face for Christopher, but the cracks were starting to show. Most nights, Eddie would call, and Buck noticed the pattern: Eddie would ask a flurry of questions, his voice a mix of distraction and desperation, as he tried to fill the silence with anything that might keep his mind off the heartache. Buck didn't mind—he liked being the one Eddie turned to, the anchor in the storm.

During their conversations, Eddie shared that his family was coming to town for Shannon's funeral. Buck could hear the tension in his voice; it was clear they were coming not just to pay their respects but to convince Eddie to bring Christopher back to Texas. Buck felt a wave of empathy for his friend. Not only did Eddie have to face the heart-wrenching reality of saying goodbye to Shannon, but he also had to endure the pressure from his family, who seemed to undermine his capability as a father. Buck had never met Eddie's family, but the thought of them made his blood boil. They were either rude or woefully ignorant because Eddie was, without a doubt, the best father Buck had ever seen.

Eddie would talk about how Christopher was handling everything. Buck recalled the day Eddie had to tell Christopher about his mom's death. That little boy was far too perceptive for his age; he understood everything Eddie was trying to convey, even if it shattered his young heart. Buck could only imagine the rage and confusion that must have coursed through Christopher—mad at the universe for taking his mom away yet again. Now, Eddie was left to navigate the aftermath, and Buck could see the worry etched on his face as he spoke. Christopher had taken to locking himself in his room, emerging only for dinner and school. Even at dinner, he would grab his food and retreat, a silent acknowledgment of the pain that filled their home.

Sometimes, Eddie would ask Buck to come over to talk to Christopher. "You just know what to say," Eddie would insist, his voice tinged with hope. Buck felt the weight of that request; he wanted to help, but he was at a loss for how to reach the boy. When he did manage to talk to Christopher, Buck would often find the kid expressing that he didn't want to burden his dad with his feelings. It was a heartbreaking thought for a child so young.

"You shouldn't have to worry about that, buddy," Buck would gently remind him, wishing he could take away the heavy responsibility that Christopher felt. It wasn't fair for a child to shoulder such emotional weight, yet it was clear he had inherited that selfless nature from Eddie. They both cared more about the well-being of others than their own, and that was one of the many reasons Buck loved them so deeply. But he couldn't shake the feeling that they needed to learn to care for themselves, too. For now, though, he vowed to care enough for all of them—if only to lighten the load that Eddie and Christopher were carrying together.

To Buck's surprise, Eddie didn't waste any time getting back to work right after Shannon's funeral. The moment he stepped into the station, he exuded an air of determination, as if the weight of his grief had transformed into an urgent need to dive back into the fray. Buck had expected Eddie to take some time off, to retreat and process the loss, but instead, he walked in as though he were ready to face the world head-on, his posture rigid, his expression set.

That week was nothing short of chaotic. The usual flurry of emergency calls was amplified by a sense of urgency that seemed to pulse through the station. Buck found himself glancing at Eddie more often than usual, his instincts screaming that something had shifted. He didn't want to attribute the chaos solely to Eddie's presence, but it was hard to ignore how the intensity around them felt different. The usual camaraderie had a sharp edge, and it seemed like everyone was working twice as hard to keep their minds off the void left by Shannon's absence.