Tormented

Chapter 17

I laid in my bed unable to think about anything else other than way he kissed that girl in front of me. The same girl I know he slept with at that party a couple of weeks ago. It hurt. I know it shouldn't. He made no promises to me, but after everything that happened with my mum I thought maybe things had changed. I allowed myself to hope he would be different, but I guess that was my mistake.

When my phone buzzed for the hundredth time I ignored it. Since I walked out of school my phone had been bombarded with texts and calls from Sarah. I just didn't want to talk. I wanted to be left alone to feel to numb ache in my chest.

My mind goes back to four o'clock. I couldn't believe his nerve when he turned up at my door to work on our new assignment after what he did. The way he looked at me. He knew. He knew he fucked up.

It felt so satisfying when I got the slam the door in his stupid face, luckily for me mom was in the kitchen, so I didn't have to explain to her why I was slamming the door in someone's face. I don't know if I would have had the restraint not to blame her, at least partly for the role she played in the whole thing.

I stared off into the darkness of my room with my duvet pulled all the way up to my neck as I cocooned myself, while I threw a pity party for one.

Just as I was about to doze off I heard a noise. Like something tapping the glass of my window. But I ignored it, only imagining who it would have been. It wasn't until I heard something crash into my room when I jumped from my bed flicking the light on.

'What the fuck are you doing?' I shouted at Benedict, quiet enough not to wake my mother... although that bang probably would have already done the job.

'You were ignoring me.' He tells me as he lay on my bedroom floor having just fallen through my bedroom window.

'Do you not think there may be a reason for that? Get out, now!'

'I... I can't. I wanted to see you.' He slurs.

'Have you been drinking?'

He doesn't respond, he just shrugs his shoulders while he lays on the floor, not even attempting to get up.

'You can't be here. My mum will kill you.'

'Then we'll just have to be quiet.' He tells me as he told his finger up to his lips. 'Ssshh.'

'This is not happening.' I say to myself. 'This has got to be a nightmare. You're not really here. I'll wake up any second...'

'I'm as real as they come babe.'

'Eh, don't call me that.'

'Why not?' He asks, using my bed to pull himself up from the floor, before he drops down on it.

'You know why.'

'Do I?...'

'If you don't then you have more problems then you realise.'

'I didn't do anything though... she kissed me, alright?'

'Convenient.'

'Please Char.' Benedict pleads from the bed.

'Leave.' I tell him in one word.

'I can't.'

'Why?'

'I almost broke my neck climbing up here, I'll die if I go back down that way.'

'That's a shame. It was nice knowing you. Now get out.'

'I supposed I could go out the front door?' He suggests with a smirk on his face.

'No... my mum can't see you.' I tell him.

'Guess I'm staying then sweetheart.'

'You can sleep on the floor then. Get off my bed.'

'Why? You wanted me to fuck you in it the other night.'

I cringe at the use of that harsh word. He was right. I was more than ready to have sex with him despite everything he'd done to me, but that was Friday night and with today burned into my mind I didn't want him to touch me.

'Well a lot has changed since then.'

'What if I promise to keep my hands to myself?' He winks.

'Will you?'

'Maybe, come and get into bed and find out.' He says as he taps the empty space next to him.

'You're impossible.'

'It's why you love me.'

'Yeah... right.' I scoff. 'Move over.' I tell him as I stand at the edge of the bed seeing all the space behind him.

'Can't, no room.'

'Are you kidding, look at that tiny space. You're not spooning me all night.'

'Why?' He pouts. 'Worried you won't be able to control your sexual desires?'

'Oh don't worry, there's no chance anything will happen tonight.'

'And to think I risked my life, climbing up that trellis...'

'I didn't ask you to.'

'But you're glad I did.' He speaks for me as he slides over mere centimetres.

I lay down next to him, keeping close to the edge. I was still angry with him, but there was the tiniest part. A very very small part that kind of found this... cute.

'Want to help me take my jeans off?' He whispers into my ear.

'No, just go to sleep.' I say flicking the light off as I settled into the bed.

I felt him fidgeting in the bed next to me, practically shaking the bed as he struggled to pull his jeans off, but there was no way I was going to help him... not straight away anyway. But before I could flick the light back on I heard the thud of his jeans hitting the floor before he stopped moving.

'I'm sorry.' He says into the dark.

What was he doing to me? What was he even doing here? Why was he drinking, especially on a school night?

'Char?'

'Hhmmm.' I hum.

'Can you... can you hold me?'

'What?'

'Just for a minute?'

I rollover to face him. Not sure I'd heard him right.

'You want to cuddle?'

'Only for a little bit. I need to know you forgive me.'

'I don't remember saying I had?'

'Please Char.'

My body moved of its own accord toward him. I wrapped my arm over the top of him when he pulled me even closer to him, pressing me against his chest.

His cologne invaded my senses along with the stench of whiskey. It was strong and it was all I could smell, but I found myself not minding as I rested my head on his chest.

His arms snaked around me, holding me in place as if he was worried I'd pull away at any second, but I didn't want to. I was relaxed while being held in his arms. I felt... safe. I didn't want this to end. I wanted to stay awake and just enjoy it while it last, but after a while sleep took over my body, letting me dream of something nice for the first time in a long time.