"What if?" A Levihan and Eremika story

Chapter 1 - "What am I to you?"

"Mikasa...what am I to you?"...
Those words echoed in Mikasa's head. She couldn't tell him, could she? I mean now's her chance. But it's so out of the blue. What if he doesn't even like her back? What if she's just a sister to him? What if she's just a girl that he saved 8 years ago? She couldn't tell him. Could she?

...
Eren wiped away his tears as he looked up to the moon. The air was chilly against his face as he listened to the people below him chatting amongst each other.
Mikasa panted as she ran up the grassy cliff to reach Eren.

"Eren!" She shouted breathlessly as she caught up.

"What are you thinking? Did you forget we're undercover in enemy territory and you're their number one target?! Everyone's been out looking for you!" She snapped, concerned and annoyed at him for wandering off. He still stared at the people below as more tears fell down from his Emerald eyes. She stopped talking and let out a tiny gasp as he wiped his tears away.

She stood next to him and saw that he was looking down at 2 familiar-looking young boys who were waving at him.

"Is that the boy from the market? Did something happen here?" Mikasa asked urgently. Earlier that day one of the young boys had stolen from them.

"No. Nothing yet." Eren replied in a dull tone.
"What does that mean? Is this-" She asked him, confused, but dreading the answer.

"These people are refugees who lost their homes in Marley's wars. They're like us. The world they knew before suddenly ended. Everything they had was taken...and the freedom they enjoyed is long gone." Eren looked down on the people; most of them were in tents due to being homeless. Mikasa stared at him, trying to read his facial expressions. He looked pensive and lost.

He turned to look at her, making eye contact.

"Mikasa. I need to ask you..." They stood just less than a foot apart from one another, staring into each other's eyes.
"Why you care for me as much as you do?" He asked her, still in his dull tone. Mikasa wanted to answer. But when she opened her mouth all that came out was a pathetic breath.
"Because I saved you... back when we were little kids, or is it more because you see me as family?" Mikasa was taken back, her mouth hung open, no words able to escape.
"Mikasa... What am I to you?" He asked her, practically whispering, his face was bare, but his eyes were desperate. Mikasa's cheeks flushed a dark shade of red. She stared into those green eyes of his; they were squinted and hurt. He was in pain.
Her mouth shook as she tried to speak.

"Well..." His hopeless eyes didn't leave hers. Her dark beautiful eyes were wide open.
"You're my uh..." She couldn't get the words out. Why couldn't she get the words out? He looked so distraught like he knew she'd say the wrong answer. But she was lost for words. A lump formed in the back of her throat. She swallowed. And put her hand on her chest. Her breathing was even and her hand trembled.
"Y-You're not family, Eren, you..." His head raised slightly and his eyes widened. His face went warm as he felt his cheeks turn pink.

"I want... I want...I want us to live together. I don't care where just somewhere. I wish it could be forever but...5 years is better than none. Right?..." She asked, she smiled, and her eyes welled up; she stood closer and grabbed his hand. He gently squeezed it. But he looked down; he couldn't face to look at her expression.

"I want that too Mikasa. I do but... Do you really think we could leave everyone? We don't know how many of them would perish on Paradis, we'd have to spend the rest of our lives running, and so would they. And after I die, you'd be on your own. You wouldn't be able to have kids, and all of our friends could die. Armin, Sasha, Historia..." He took a shaky breath as he continued to speak.
"Even if they survived the war, you'd all slowly die out due to old age. Just so I can live a little bit longer? I want them and you to live long and happy lives. I can't take that away just for me..." He finally looked at her, tears brimming in his eyes. Her dark eyes were bloodshot and filled with tears as she looked up at him. He couldn't face the guilt he was feeling from looking at the pain in her eyes. So he looked away again and began to move his hand out of her grasp. But she increased her grip and moved it closer.