Can I Lean On You | Finley & Harlyn #2

Chapter 22

Finley

"Fin! It's been...way too long!" Max exclaims as soon as the video call connects. He has new glasses, and he's cut his hair since we last called. I think I might cry.

"I know." For a moment, I just stare at him. And he just stares at me. When I finally swallow down the lump in my throat, I say, "I miss you."

He smiles at me. "I miss you, too." And then his eyebrows draw together in the middle. "Are you ok? You look like you haven't slept in days."

God, why does he know me so well?

"Uh, yeah. Everything's fine. Just a lot going on, I guess."

I try to distract him with questions about Dana and work and his roommates and his parents. And it works for a while. He'll talk about Dana all day if I let him. But then he stops between anecdotes and squints at me.

"What?"

"You're being very quiet." He looks at me over his glasses. "What's on your mind?"

"It's everything I've already texted you about."

"Yes, but that was texting. Now we're talking."

I roll my eyes but start talking. It's Max, after all. Max knows all my oddities and has dealt with my anxiety for longer than most people. So, I let it all out. I rehash the whole thing at Harlyn's work and everything that happened the week after. I told him about it after it happened, but he's right. It's different saying it out loud. And then I move on to Fran moving out and the possibility of Harlyn moving in. Or at the very least, a new roommate.

"You don't happen to want to move to England, too, do you? There's a room available."

Max grins. "I'll think about it and get back to you. I think Harlyn should go for it, though. You two living together but not like...living together would be kind of a good trial run, you know? For both of you."

I had the same thought, actually. The thought of fully moving in with Harlyn - sharing a little studio somewhere with one bed - while conceptually amazing, brings a whole lot of terror with it. We're definitely not ready for that yet. But sharing a house? Having our own rooms that we can go to if we need space? Still close? That sounds...kind of nice.

I'm not sure I can tell Harlyn that or have that conversation. Tiptoeing through that decision without saying the wrong thing would be my worst nightmare.

"Yeah, it would."

"You guys have talked about it, right?"

"Yeah, we talked about it a few days ago. I told him it was up to him."

I know, logically, that we should talk more about it - boundaries and expectations. But as soon as he asked my opinion the other day, the thought of voicing my opinion felt like the most terrifying idea in the world. What if he didn't agree? What if the boundaries I proposed were too much for him? What if he doesn't really want to move in with me, but he's being polite? And if I said I wanted him to move here, would it freak him out and push him away?

"That's it? That's all you told him? All you talked about?"

"Yes."

"Fin, that's -"

He's interrupted by a knock on my door.

"Come in!"

Harlyn is shoved unceremoniously through the door by Elly. "El, chill."

"You weren't moving fast enough," Elly informs him, skirting around him. "Finley, your boyfriend's here, and it's time for movie night."

Max's eyes light up on my phone screen. "Elly!"