Gilded Obsession

Chapter 11

I can't believe I almost had to lie to her tonight.

She saw my scratches and she asked about them. I did not want to lie. With her, I don't do that. With her, I need to be truthful. Luckily, she guessed that it had something to do with my martial arts and I didn't confirm that that's what happened, but I didn't deny it either. That's the closest I am willing to fly near an actual lie. And even this omittance of truth I feel guilty about. I want to tell her the truth. However, I know she's not ready for that yet.

I can't just tell her that it's self-defense wounds.

Not my self-defense. Self-defense wounds from the asshole I took out earlier today.

I had become distracted, thinking about whether my Goddess was doing okay the night before her first final, and it had caused me to lose a bit of skin.

All in all, it wasn't too bad, however, now my precious angel had seen and almost suspected. And it took me longer than usual to clean my DNA from under his nails.

On the bright side though, my Goddess noticing the scratches had caused her to be near me for a while. She was practically sitting on my lap as she nursed me back to health. It showed how much she truly cares about me.

It also ensured that I got to spend some additional free moments with her.

And most importantly, it allowed me to tease her just a little bit.

There hadn't been a need for me to take off half my shirt the way I had, however, I wanted to see her reaction when I did. She had stared at my chest before – in my dress and shirtless suit – so my expectations had been high. And she didn't disappoint. She never does. She never could.

Her reaction confuses me though. Because she claims that she's only into men – and I am not generally one to question a self-established sexuality – however, I saw her pupils dilate and her breathing hitch, then quicken ever so slightly.

To me, those are not reactions stemming purely from aesthetic appreciation. But I must be wrong.

I can't believe I got to hold her hand tonight though. More than once as well. And what I can believe even less is how giddy that simple fact makes me feel. It's a hand, for goodness' sake. I had slept with countless women, yet this particular woman could make my heart speed up by a simple touch of her hand. Embarrassing.

It also didn't bode well for my obsession and the path it was turning towards.

My own body's reaction to an innocent touch like this was concerning to say the least. However, I am still proud of myself for my self-control, because I did not kiss her tonight. Not even when I had many opportunities to do so. And I really, really wanted to.

That's one line I won't cross though. I will not kiss her first. Not unless she asks for it. Sigh. The pipedream. I am not delusional enough to think it will happen, but I have yet to lose hope. And even if we never kiss, she is still mine.

--

I watch her on camera every night she works at the bar now. I purposefully plan my little outings around her work nights and if that's not possible, I make sure to have the camera footage pulled up on my phone. That way, I can check up on her, slice a throat, and check up on her again.

I know I probably shouldn't, but it's the only way I get to see her. Besides, she is working at my bar, therefore I am entitled to make sure everything at my bar is going well.

It's easier to control my rage at people flirting with her when there's a screen separating us though. So, that's something.

She finished her final exams last week and she let me know both went well. I knew they would, because my angel is amazing.